Tuesday 30 December 2014

Dutch DJ illustrates high status attraction

“Life doesn’t give second chances in entirety, but what it does instead is offer opportunities to resurrect past mistakes, regrets, embarrassments and misdemeanours.”

If you have ever spent more than a few seconds of your life wondering why certain mediocre, or even ugly, DJs appear to effortlessly attract women to their attentions within your local town or city, you most definitely won’t be alone.  This subject first came to my mindset when I ventured out in bars and clubs in Derby before I could legally take a sip of the stronger stuff.

I always remember how it appeared to be a running joke back then with regards to how ugly DJs tended to be.  In retrospect, not that many were actually ugly per se.  They were just simply not blessed with good looks, so the idle male jealous reaction when viewing a man of this kind with a more than blessed looking woman is to identify him as being grotesque.  By and large, these “music maestros” were average in physical attractiveness.

This “averageness” stacks up in logical terms.  Less than 1% of men can be categorized as very good looking in facial terms, and many of these with handsome features are lacking in height or body profile impressiveness.  Then bear in mind that, if I was to base it on my home city, there are no more than a dozen men in a position of worthwhile venue DJ profiles in comparison to the other 10,000 guys out that weekend night.  So the probability of finding a physically blessed DJ is going to be extremely remote.  With absolute isolated exceptions taken on board, no ego and attention seeking woman dating a DJ will convince me otherwise.

As a fan of electronic music, I came across this link during a bitterly cold winter afternoon the other day.  The DJ is Martin Garrix – an 18 year old kid from The Netherlands.  The venue in Alkmaar played host to the annual gig in late April this year that was labelled SLAM!Koningsdag 2014.  Of course, I’m only telling readers from Holland what they already know about their nation’s “King’s Day” and this respective festival. 

The demographics seen in the crowd are what you would expect at a social event of this kind within an audience aged predominantly 16 to 21.  Even more predictable was the gender split, and their relative position within the many tens of thousands.  What you see is common to any social gathering where high status men are present.  It is clear to see that >95% of spectators at the front are female, even though an estimate of fewer than 20% of the total capacity belong to this gender.  Other young women scattered around could be seen on their lapdog boyfriends’ shoulders.  This is a sight to me – men allowing their female partners to “show off their worth to the world” at a leveraged height above ground level – that acts as a pathos as much as it brings amusement. 

The majority of the crowd (>80%) were your typical clueless beta male followers who would be there more for the low chance of pulling girls than the music offering.  This is a lesson in itself for all mankind, but especially teenage boys/early 20s men with time on their sides to learn the most.  A 1:5 girl/guy ratio is never easy at the best of times, but you are pretty much wasting your efforts throughout a timescale where female eyes, tongues and sometimes even vaginal juices are transfixed onto one so more powerful than you.  Even men accompanying their girlfriends will need to accept that she will spend the whole hour or so wishing she was with him and not you.  The truth may hurt, but the truth can allow you to lean on perspective, know women for what they are, make wiser decisions and choose smarter actions in the future.

With reference to this gig where Garrix is the star of the show, but in general terms too, this is why DJs (or high profile men of similar status) attract women in a way a boy off the street could only dream of:

Modern day media exposure 

Like never before and growing year on year, our eyes cannot avoid magazines, TV programs, information on celebrity earnings and internet exposure on the rich and famous lifestyle.  All this manifests in making that little brain of ours wish we were in their shoes.  Men can be guilty of these habits, but needless to say women, who have a stronger urge of self-entitlement and lower inclination to pro-act their life onto a higher step, are the sex who see it through both greater envious and infatuated thresholds.  So when they are in the presence of male high status, women find it hard to control their attraction onto the focused man.

Male power

This video offers no greater example to how a DJ is portrayed with power in the face of onlookers.  Within a crowd of near on six figures, Garrix is the conductor of the orchestra, and he pretty much has every one of them on a string.  Even low profile local DJs playing in front of mere hundreds or dozens have this same relative greater strength.  Women love powerful men of all kinds, and this can be seen in any company you work in where the main director may be skinny, lanky, spotty and socially awkward, yet female attraction onto him cannot be concealed. 

In fairness to Garrix, he is a very decent looking young man anyway.  Sure, he may be a bit short and lack any true stand out physical presence, but he would attract a reasonable number of young women his age without any high profile.  But place all this on a powerful plate, and a dish is served that represents a true babe magnet to women of various age brackets, but in particular girls of similar age to him.

Male pre-selection and importance

Women also love pre-selected men who have full confirmation that other people – women and men alike – desire to be in his company.  So 11 footballers playing in front of thousands of attendees have full proof that people admire them.  An overweight chief executive making a speech to a hundred folk in the work canteen is worth far more than any of the younger or better looking male counterparts during those few minutes.  One single man spinning tunes on a laptop to 100,000 music gatherers negates any quality that other men attain within the close environment.

Female leveraged social proof and self-importance

Nevertheless, none of the above points come close to the uncontrollable needs that the female mind obtains in terms of a required level of social proof and self-importance elevation.  Being a self-centred, self-obsessed and self-conscious creature to planet earth, if a woman can grasp onto a man’s status standing, this allows her inner perceived importance grade to jump above any of her close friends and foes.  This factor alone is worth far more to her than the attraction onto the high status man due to his popular profile.

Never has a need for social validation been more important to a woman than the modern day.  Granted, it has been there for numerous generations from our past, but social media sites have simply compounded this beast to another league.  Because what was once more subjective can now be objectified and quantified.  If a woman has a picture taken with someone so well known, and likewise she receives more “likes” and comments than her female rivals, she can convince herself that the life she lives is that much better than anyone else.  And when all is said and done, this is a woman’s primary mission – to believe she is living the best life possible and one of more importance and drama than others.

Q-tip 1:
Look at many of the young women in the crowd, and you will notice how they are naturally looking up in the direction of the DJ.  Then notice how they are in fact as, if not more, interested in the big screen above.  A primary thought is for them to be spotted on the screen, and a secondary motivation is the DJ himself.

For a moment, imagine Martin Garrix has finished his set and passed the “ones and twos” onto a female DJ.  This is what you could expect from the same audience:
  • The majority of female spectatorship (especially those at the front) will now be even more transfixed onto the big screen.  Very little admiration will be projected onto the female DJ, although a degree of fake “go girl” chants could be the occasional hearing. 
  • A small minority of women in the crowd will be more genuinely supportive towards the DJ.  This is typical of women who are less self-obsessed and in need of female role models to give them inspiration in life.
  • If the female DJ is incredibly hot, watch for the irritable expressions on the faces of >90% of women in the crowd.
  • If the female DJ is hot, the men in the crowd will stay in hope of as many big screen shots of her as possible.  They will only be interested in her beauty, and not her talent, status or wealth.
  • If the female DJ is nothing more than average looking, the male audience will have no interest in her as an act, and they will stay only in anticipation of openings with girls in their vicinity.

Q-tip 2:
Men are sexually aroused and attracted to the hottest women.  Only when physical beauty is of parity do other female desirables have much bearing.  Women are most sexually aroused by the hottest men, but they are more attracted to men who can place many other things on the table.  The most beneficial items men can place on the table to attract women are status (mainly social, but occupational too), wealth, confidence and attitude (in that order of importance).

Caveat 1 to the above:
The beneficial items in order of importance stated are applicable to attract a woman, but not necessarily to lock down a woman.
Caveat 2 to the above:
The beneficial items in order of importance stated are applicable to women above the age of 23.  For women under this age, place wealth to the back of the list, and the status (still most important) is heavily weighted towards social profile as opposed to occupational position.

As I couldn’t have written this post without April’s spring day that happened in The Netherlands, I think it is only moral of me to give my two pennies of thought from what I have experienced with their good natives.  Within the UK, and possibly beyond too, Dutch people are somewhat stereotyped for being opinionated, arrogant, over-confident, moody, outspoken and up their own backsides.  A former work colleague of mine said they should be given the benefit of the doubt, adding that their liberal lifestyle makes them designed to be this way.  There is also a consensus that Dutch people speak better English than the English themselves.

From my interaction with those who dress in orange, whether that has been within their own border parameters or in Spanish surroundings (similar to Brits, their rubbish Northern European weather leads them to far warmer climes on any given opportunity), I have always found their genuine nature as a breath of fresh air.  As a person who prides himself on honesty, absent of egoism and agendas, I would take this kind of character any day of the week over someone who wouldn’t say boo to a goose or is forever frightened of consequences.  I mean, Louis Van Gaal has barely ever smiled during the few months he has been at Manchester United, but his dry sense of humour, honest words and lack of trepidation to upset people makes me piss myself.  Bring us more people like him…

But more relevant to me is the good ladies of Holland.  With fewer inhabitants and colder weather, they are essentially not as striking in number or glamour as Spanish or Italian women, or even as impressive in percentage terms as Portuguese or Greek women, but there is still one almighty decent benchmark if you take the time to study them.  Even on the video link, there were more than enough cute birds and some hot ones to keep me entertained.  When I consider The Netherlands is only a quarter of the population that sits in the UK, why is it that a smaller country like this can churn out so many more eye catching women?  If you have any answers, please forward them over to my British female compatriots.


Happy New Year to you all, and here’s to a fortuitous, prosperous, but ultimately healthy 2015.



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