Tuesday 25 May 2021

Do some women like bald men?

 

“The most stupid question is the question you never asked,

and the question you don’t know the answer to.”

  

It is a topic you might find yourself hearing amongst female groups, or indeed mixed groups – do women find bald men physically attractive?  Like anything else involved in women’s emotional verbalization and genuine physical attractiveness in men, you should do these two things:

1)    Watch what she does, ahead of listening to what she says.

2)    Analyse her body language when she speaks about her predilections.

As someone who has gone full circle with hair on head prominence, I am in a reasonable position to assess it from both sides.  Prior to six months of aggressive chemotherapy, I possessed a full head of hair without the slightest sign of it receding.  This may sound an obvious statement as a young man, but I’m sure anyone knows at least one man in their life who started to lose his hair as soon as his early twenties came about.  By the time I was into the final month (ironically, it started to slowly grow back prior to the final chemo session) of chemotherapy, I effectively looked like a man who had lost most of his hair on top, and who had opted to shave it.  No longer than three months post chemotherapy completion, it was pretty much back to its previous length, texture, and colour.

How did women receive me on both scales?

The year before diagnosed with cancer, I was at a sweet spot in terms of my physical attractiveness peak.  I was still partly fresh faced as a late teenager/early 20s man, but not too much in the way of a “pretty boy” vision (as one woman I dated pointed that out a couple of years prior).  What I didn’t have as much then, in comparison to post cancer, was as high degree of confidence, self-assurance, and couldn’t give a crap attitude to what people think of me.  I had countless women give me the eye, but I can’t help but confess to, back then, not dealing with every situation with efficient and productive response.

Throughout the six months of chemotherapy was much more complex to evaluate.  To start with, there wasn’t too much change.  The hair loss didn’t come to fruition until about a month into the treatment, but naturally far fewer women noticed my presence (apart from those who may have wondered why I looked different).  After the first month, I may as well have been invisible to most women I didn’t know personally up until the final day.  Ironically though, more than a few women at work, who previously never engaged with me before chemo, were much more engaging and proactive with me.  At the time I thought this was down to nothing more than their concern and sympathy.  In retrospect, I believe it was more down to me looking much more vulnerable and attainable to them.  For the record, I had it shaven after about two months (in truth and hindsight, I should have taken this approach before the first session).

A couple of weeks after my final chemotherapy session, I went on two nights out prior to Christmas approaching.  I hadn’t been out at all for six months in this context.  By now my hair was starting to look like a man who had opted to shave it with a full head of hair (hence the hair follicles had grown back), although, whilst looking younger than myself of receding hair look, I looked five years older than my usual stylish hairstyle look. 

The first night out surprised me.  I went to Germany (Stuttgart) with a friend for a football, Christmas market and beer weekend, and the first night I noticed quite a few women giving me eye contact.  The following weekend I was back in Derby.  It was the night I met my longest term (albeit on and off) girlfriend still to this day.  She looked stunning, yet I had to look behind me to check that she was in fact looking at me.  We joked for years that, considering I was clearly not looking my best, the calibre of men in there must have been pretty dire in order for her to find me the best catch!  In hindsight once more, and I did allude to this with her once or twice (to which, obviously, she both denied and tried to bypass the subject) that perhaps the fact she was looking at a man 10% to 15% less physically attractive than her was what appealed the most.

Three months after chemotherapy, and with negligible differences to this day, I have never had so many women check me out.  This can be women a young as their late teens to women in their 50s.  A lot to do with this is developing into a more rugged and handsome look (even though I don’t think I’m as good looking as I was prior to cancer), but the greater part, I firmly believe, is because I carry my demeanour in a far more confident, assured, and assertive manner.

Q-tip 1:

Women are far more attracted to a man’s positive body language and confidence than his physical allure per se.  A good-looking man with minimal confidence, who can’t look people in the eye and carry himself with self-assurance, can only go so far with the numbers of women who will find him attractive. 

So, do women like bald men?

The question remains then, what percentage of women prefer bald men (or at least have no preference either way) if all else is equal?  As always, other than intrigue I hold truly little validity to what women say or any internet poll where they can hide behind their lies, however this one link did stand out as a highlighted search.  I offer you the below snapshot to the findings:

“As women get older, they find men with clean-shaven heads more attractive. 44% of women 35 to 44 find bald men attractive compared to only 19% of women 18 – 24. As a majority of men tend to really start losing their hair a little later in life, this is very encouraging.”

The answers from the three female age groups (18 to 24, 25 to 34, and 35 to 44) in the study most likely reflect what you would find in the real world, with perhaps some intricate fibs on their parts. 

18 to 24 women

Even though I go down on record as stating at least half of women in this age range still prefer to be with a man who is less physically attractive, I find that most women in this age range still want their man to look good.  If it is the general consensus (and truth) that a man looks better with hair than without, then the vast majority of women in the younger years will not find bald men attractive.  In simple language, a young woman then is still inclined to go for a less physically attractive man, yet she will seek a less physically attractive man with hair on top.  Nearly half of women, therefore, aged 18 to 24 find bald men unattractive.

35 to 44 women

I’ve jumped to elder age range for a reason.  The study shows that, give or take a percentage or two, women finding a bald man attractive or unattractive in the female age range of 35 to 44 is a direct inverse to the women aged 18 to 24.  Whereas nearly half of young women find bald men unattractive, close on half of women aged 35 to 44 do find bald men attractive.  Only one in five older women find a bald man unattractive, so they say…

25 to 34 women

As always, I find this age range of women (and even more so if it is 24 to 32) the most complex.  The more complex a man finds a woman, the more likely it is because she lies the most when sitting in this age bracket.

According to the study, only 25% of women aged 25 to 34 find bald men attractive, whilst 41% find them unattractive.  Interesting.  I find that women in this age range, over and above the younger and elder female age ranges as illustrated, tend to seek out uglier men (uglier in respect to themselves) more than any other timeframe.  If I’m right, based on my steely eyed observations, yet only one in four women find a bald man attractive, you can only conclude that most the vast majority of women aged 25 to 34 do want a less physically attractive man, but they desire him to be uglier in attaining a full head of hair. 

Conclusions

This would be my conclusion to it all, amalgamating the findings with the reality and lies.

·       Nearly all young women (18 to 24 in this case), given the choice, prefer men with hair - irrespective to whether they want him to be less physically attractive in an overall sense or not.

·       Women aged 25 to 34 do prefer a man with hair than without, however they hold the greatest need to be with a man who is less physically attractive.  Consequently, some women in this age range will still contemplate a man without hair on top, and a smaller segment will even actively look for a man without hair due to his lower appeal to other women.

·       More women aged 35 to 44 will be open to dating bald men, but the percentage (44%) of women declaring they find bald men attractive is, in the main, a fib.  What they are really saying is, due to their (women post 34) reduced options in the sexual market, is they would bring down their physical standards in men in order to have that male companion.

A final thought

Irrespective of what women say on the subject of men with hair on top or not, and as stated above this often has to be taken with a pinch of salt in terms of the truth and reality, probably the bigger issue here is what men themselves would like.  In essence, I doubt there is more than 1% of men out there who prefers his bald head in comparison to when he had a full head of hair.  He will most likely prefer his shaved bald look to receding look (and so he should), but that’s not the question here.

If so many men were happy with their bald head, then there wouldn’t be this whole hair growth obsession you now see with both celebrity men and everyday men.  All I can say is, and Wayne Rooney is a classic example, that I’m yet to see a hair growth/transplant process that has made a man look really good.  Granted, it may marginally make him look better than the bald image, but does it really make up for the expense, time, sacrifice, and hassle to go through with it?

Q-tip 2:

If you have a physical deficiency as a man, this can be more than compensated by non-physical desirables which women are attracted to.  A man blaming his physical deficiency as the reason he can’t find a woman is the same dynamic as a woman claiming she cannot find a man because her expectations are too high.

 

Acknowledgements

Prim & Prep

Wednesday 12 May 2021

Avoid at all costs

 

“A vision of authority protrudes external admiration.

 A vision of nerves creates external repulse.”

  

There are certain visions of men that bring about an emotion in me which is balanced between sympathy and disgust.  An example could be, for want of a better one, when you walk past someone who is wearing a clearly cheap cologne, yet it doesn’t hide the fact he hasn’t washed his armpits in a couple of days.

Unless you have been living in a cave for the last few years, pretty much any adult in the world will recognize the man in the above video.  Welcome to the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom – our very own Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson (Boris Johnson to you and me!).

As far as status and profile is considered in the United Kingdom, it gets no bigger or influential than the Prime Minister.  The key word here is status.  There will be many businessmen, actors, sports stars, entrepreneurs etc who are far wealthier than BJ, but they wouldn’t be as well known.  Ask any adult (and most adolescents) who the random aforementioned celebrity or similar is, and only a percentage (depending on who he or she is) will be able to tell you.  Show a picture of Boris Johnson to this same group of people, and pretty much every single one will know it is him. 

Of course, without knowing him personally, I really like Boris Johnson on face value.  It’s been a tough time since he took over the realms, most notably guiding us (with a lot of good decisions compared to other countries) through the national epidemic and global pandemic.  He comes across as a genuine, decent, likeable and approachable guy, and that is my kind of person.  A lot of idiots working in middle/senior management or directorship - who think they are the bee’s knees basked in arrogance, self-importance mentality, and bully boy approach (because they have nothing other than their profession to stand out in life) – should take note. 

I even said to someone the other day that if Boris joined us for a pint, it would just be like him being one of the lads and he would easily blend in with the group and amusement.  My friend said that we would probably even talk more sense than him – a comment that made me chuckle but was perhaps a bit harsh.

Dreadful male body language and demeanour

Unfortunately, on this occasion, I need to pick on his act above to spell out how awful it portrays him.  A vision of this kind radiates neediness, nervousness, insecurity, supplication, jealousy, a lack of trust in being with a better-looking female partner, and a downright deficiency of confidence in his own existence, calibre, and sought-after status to other women.

Someone like Boris Johnson, even with the ridicule he would sustain for holding onto his fiancĂ©’s arm, can get away with this due to his Prime Minister label.  Many women would even give the “It’s so cute” crap because it shows how much he loves her and is protective of her.  Wrong.  Love and protection of a woman should not be construed as all the negative verbs illustrated above.  Love and protection are easy offerings to give a woman, effortless in their nature, but commanding, assertive and assured in her recipient mind.

Not to be confused with this previous post, a man should always strive to be in a position where his female partner, irrespective to whether it is his (new or long term) girlfriend, fiancĂ©, or wife, is the one uncontrollably and subconsciously (even unconscious to a point if in bed during the night/early morning) taking his arm, hand or otherwise.  When it is the inverse situation – him grabbing her – then there are only murky waters ahead at worse, or at best she puts up with it based on her ego being a bigger priority than her heart.

Q-tip:

Be the man who only grabs his female partner’s hand when she is in a potentially vulnerable external scenario (hence a crowded environment), or when a dominant approach is required (hence towards the bedroom). 

A final thought

Some of you may be wondering why Boris Johnson would get away with this poor act of kind in relation to any other (non-famous) man off the street.  A longer explanation of this concept will be given in another post, however for now, I’ll simplify it in the way of how (post 23 years of age, and some younger too) women prioritize their requirements in what a man can offer them:

1)    Her survival (hence a man’s economic status producing a better life for her)

2)    Her ego/self-importance (his profile/status accordingly raising her status)

3)    Her sexual needs/inclinations for fulfilment (fundamentally picking the men who arouse her the most)

Obviously, Boris ticks the top two very highly.  Again, a more elaborated illustration of this female selection criteria awaits in a future post.


Acknowledgements

www.youtube.com

Monday 3 May 2021

The vision of a lonely woman


“People don’t seize moments.  Moments seize people.”

(Boyhood, 2014)

  

As regular readers of this blog will have worked out long ago, I’m not the most forgiving or compassionate when it comes to women’s situations in life on a general basis.  I believe they make a rod for their own backs, mostly and metaphorically.  

Nevertheless, on occasions my compassion, thoughts and consideration do stretch beyond the normal stingy offerings, especially when it appears like a woman is struggling in life.  This male concern tends to increase in a direct lineage with female age, and this makes sense.  As women get older, they become less desirable to men.  As they become less desirable to men, they usually become friendlier and more approachable.  As they become friendlier and approachable, it is a natural inclination for a man to be friendly and engaging in return.  Unlike women who are aroused and attracted to men acting like jerks/bad boys, men are less attracted to women who act like bitches and a basically unpleasant human being.  Most women fail to, or refuse to, get this easy concept in their heads.                            

The anecdote

In this post written a few months ago, I documented meeting an attractive young woman where it appeared to have promise in where it could lead.  To clarify straight away, it didn’t lead to anything.  There were a few reasons why: 

·       First, with UK lockdown announced measures extended for at least another few months post our interactions in January, there was no opportunity to meet.  This naturally, on both her and my part, deflated the enthusiasm in text language.  If you can’t get sexual, there really is no place to go.

·       Second, I still get the feeling she had some kind of “ex” on the scene where, whilst not her boyfriend, didn’t allow her to fully commit her mind to me.  I always had the feeling I was kind of her next lined up guy after this one finished.

·       Third, my liking towards her as a person incrementally decreased every day for the approximate four weeks we kept in touch.  Whilst she most definitely came across as potential girlfriend material when we met and spoke, her games, disappearing acts (in text terms) and attempted apathy (most likely contrived rather than natural) started to piss me off.  Over time, she came across as a time waster and, quite frankly, someone who had her head in the clouds and came out with a lot of crap.

Once she didn’t reply to my final text around middle of January, I wrote this off as something that will 99% chance not ever come to anything.  It actually came as a relief, as due to not being able to see her, I would never have been able to totally know whether her apathetic demeanour was one of not being that interested, or conversely being very interested but vainly attempting to act otherwise to keep her pride and ego intact.  These are the things only truly known when you see a woman in actuality.  

Post lockdown

The first Saturday morning after gyms reopened, as I walked through the male changing rooms into the gym area, she miraculously came out of the female’s equivalent at the same time.  Coincidence or planning on her part?  I looked at her and the first thing that struck me was how much weight she had lost.  I hate to condemn women for this, especially considering how most women have put on weight during the closure of gyms and similar, however her nice curves had transformed to a skinnier frame not as much to my liking.  Her skin was also incredibly spotty.  She mentioned, most likely to justify why she wasn’t looking too great, how she had been out the night before on cocktails.  Strange that, as I don’t know of many people, let alone women, who would attend the gym at 8am after a night on the booze. 

We walked down to the weights area, but the voice inside my head had no inclination whatsoever to talk for long about the interim period or anything else.  I was fortunate that my first planned exercise was at the near side of this area, to which she said (with enthusiasm) that she would see me later.  I rattled on with my workout, and never went to see her.

The following Saturday, she was working out around the core body area which is situated where I was to wrap up that day.  After I had completed my workout, I felt obliged to have a quick chat.  She never asked me anything about myself, and all content was about her job, her friends, her planned vacations, and a (friend’s) wedding in the summer.  That aside, as she spoke there wasn’t a part of my penis that ran away with my mind.  I had lost pretty much all my sexual attraction onto her.  I made a final comment to finish the conversation, and I walked off.

The following Saturday, she walked in and commenced dead lifts about ten yards from me.  I noticed she had her hair tied up, but enough to indicate that her hair had been trimmed from waist/lower back length to shoulder length/2” past shoulder.  That’s an eight to twelve inches off her once long, brunette style. 

Q-tip 1:

I fully appreciate sometimes women need to shorten their hair length based on mitigating circumstances, and some, once kids come along, will do it through conscious choice due to the reduced time it then takes to get ready each morning.  Nevertheless, a woman who reduces her hair length by a significant margin will, by near absolution, lose a pronounced degree of her physical attractiveness.  Any honest man would say the same.

The lonely look

I can tell a lonely look in a woman’s face when I see one.  I can also detect one that reflects frustration in life.  This woman couldn’t hide either.  No amount of social media posting about how dramatic, busy, fast-paced, popular and sociable her life is will conceal the reality that goes on inside her head.

I sympathise for these kinds of women – like her at the heart of this post – because I have, by and large, found myself in romantic involvements with girl’s girls (women who are more into girl gatherings than having a boyfriend all the time) than homely girls (women who seemingly are never without a boyfriend in life).  This is despite the latter outweighing the former by, based on my estimations and experiences, a 10:1 ratio.  Girl’s girls love the life when there are plenty of female social options.  As explained in this post, the last year, and the medium term here on in at least, isn’t a great place to be this woman.

The usual scenario of female friendships groups

The problem for girl’s girls is, as strongly implied above, they are only as happy as the women who accompany them.  In any given female social - whether genuine friendship, convenience friendship, or fake friendship – the chances of all women belonging to a girl’s girl character is near on impossible.  Even looking at it optimistically from her perspective, a group of eight women would comprise of this:

·       1 nr dedicated girl’s girl

·       2 nr single girls who will, at that particular time, will be indifferent about meeting a potential boyfriend

·       2 nr single girls who are actively on the lookout for a boyfriend.  They aren’t too keen on girl gathering longevity, but they do like to stay in touch for drama’s sake

·       3 nr women who have boyfriends, and rarely go out with the girls 

Like I say, this is the girl’s girl optimistic scenario, and it will most likely be between the ages of 18 to 22.  Beyond this age range, and the boyfriend inclination and likelihood of a woman only increases. 

With this in mind, the chances for a girl’s girl to have constant, consistent and regular female gatherings is very slim over a long timeframe.  Simply put, most women prefer the validation of a boyfriend showing he loves her, no matter how mediocre or low quality the man in question may be. 

The good news for girl’s girls

With all this said, there will almost always be a safety net for a girl’s girl to fall into.  By sheer nature of subconsciously being (or consciously choosing to be) a girl’s girl, the vast majority of these women will belong to the most alluring segment of female physical attractiveness.  It is exceedingly rare to find a woman who is a girl’s girl to be <7.5/10, and far more often she will be >8/10. 

On the other side of this dynamic is their preference in men.  Girl’s girls will typically have high demands in male quality criteria (usually based on his wealth and status, but sometimes on his physical attractiveness level too), however as we know, there are far more attractive women in the world than high quality men in supply.  In sheer mathematics terms then, a high percentage of girl’s girls would be left waiting forever if they only settled for men at the highest end of male sought after calibre.

However, over time a woman will reduce her demands once the female group starts to diminish into numbers barely more than herself, and the irritation of being single for too long, simultaneous to her female friends broadcasting how great their male partners are (broadcasting that will rarely be as true or objective as they claim it to be), will lead to her looking at the next tier below in male offerings.  If still unable to locate a male suitor in that tier, she will reluctantly look in the tier below. 

If typical said girl’s girl is the usual 7.5/10 to 8.5/10 in physical attractiveness, there will be a huge pool of men for her to select from.  As most men (75% as a conservative estimation) will fall into mediocrity (not just physical looks, but most other metrics too) in male sought after terms, this will manifest as an end concept of seven or eight men out there for every single girl’s girl.  Some of these men will be single anyway, but even most men with girlfriends would ditch their better halves for an opportunity to be with a hotter woman.

Q-tip 2:

Only marriage will stand in the way of most men ditching their lesser looking female partners for the opportunity with a much hotter woman.  Absence of marriage, there are very few consequences he needs to consider.

A final thought

You will hear a lot of women bemoan the circumstance that the reason they are single is because they can’t find a man.  You can call bullshit on this claim.  What she is really saying (without having the courage to say it) is that she can’t find a man (at that particular time in her life) who meets the criteria of her demands and expectations.  

Any woman of 7/10 (And I’d even go as low as 6.5/10) or above should never have difficulty in finding a man once she grasps the reality of life, expectations, and the sheer gender number comparisons as explained above.  If she is single, and she consequently holds a grudge with life about it, she needs to take a closer look to home.

If any woman below 6.5/10 is single, she has a more justified reason to complain about being single for too long.  In this case, she faces the unfortunate circumstance where the majority of men are simply scouting for something a bit better.  There are still plenty of men out there for her, she just has to be realistic to the kind of men who will commit.