Sunday 18 March 2018

Women just cannot get on together

"Fakeness cannot cloud irritable inner feelings"

If ever you need living proof to illustrate why women are just simply not designed to amicably get on in groups where competition for attention is at stake, just take a look at this:

One is clearly antagonistic towards not being the centre of attention, another likewise but concealing this irritability better, one feeling discomfort but there for the ride, and another really trying to convince the audience (and herself) that she is so so happy to be part of this magical group.

Needless to say, who is the most comfortable, gleeful, relaxed and amicable?  You got it - the centre of attention herself!

By the way, if you listen to the lyrics it yet again smacks out language that doesn't reflect real life in terms of women's emotional habits and deliverables with men. The words would leave the naive bystander (as most people are) to think that a woman is so strong in the face of a man who, in her view, hasn't treated her right, and she has "moved on" so decisively. 

In real life, you will find that when women post messages or verbally broadcast how "over" they are or how much he has lost a prized asset princess, they are in actuality not over him at all. Contrast this to the usual course of events where the woman has dumped a man because she is bored or he no longer has anything left to other her life path - hence with boring nice guys - and I don't see her shouting from the rooftops towards how easily this chapter of her life has been tackled. She will say nothing, as in truth she is totally indifferent towards the man, just like she was indifferent about him in the majority course of the relationship.

So songs like this are reflecting the rare occasions when a woman dated a sought after popular jerk who did treat her badly. They just conveniently don't tell you they go running back to these men, such is the fear of being instead with a mundane beta male that most men are.

As a man, never allow yourself to be washed in by crap within lyrics of this nature. For every case where a woman has been treated badly by a jerk, there will be half a dozen occasions where she manipulated, lied to, and used the perennial nice guy. Leave the washed in brains to the teenage girls, and God help us older women too, who these records are produced to market attract.


Female age related challenges

"Don't be afraid to be the odd one out.  Often this person is the smartest out there."

Reader Bryce left a comment on the back of this previous post from WCMD:

Hey Vinay,

Long time no hear from, thanks for all the advice you have given. I started a new job a last year so I've been focusing on that mostly.

Are you still doing Q&A? If so, I have a few questions.

1. I find that being a good looking guy at work comes with challenges, such as teammates being mean and trying to make it look bad, managers do this too especially when they are on the younger side. Did you face any of those challenges and how did you overcome them?

It's similar to one of your posts where you mention joining a group but guys don't like the competition.

2. How did you build you apathy that leads to edginess? Basically how to not give a f#ck?

3. Also in your previous posts, you mention that some of the women you dated were very attractive, I interested in learning how to build consistency with higher quality woman. I am 28 years old now, so I don't hang around females who are in their lower 20s as often and not to mention I find them annoying sometimes...probably because I'm getting older. 

My response:

Hi Bryce,

Good to hear from you and hope all is well? Apologies for the late reply. Generally speaking I am working crazy hours which has put the blog to one side. But always happy to help:

1. I have absolutely suffered this scenario on many occasions, especially considering I live in a country like the UK where there is a culture to look after the "Great Underdog" and condemn uniqueness. The best way to overcome this predicament is to not abide by the normal lapdogs in the company, and just be yourself. Go by the "those that mind don't matter, and those that matter don't mind" mentality.  Say this to them if it comes up in conversation, as it will be amazing how quickly they shut up (as ultimately this is you DHV'ing) them. Take any negative comments or body language they project onto you as a true back-handed compliment.

2. I built the "what's the worst that can happen" mindset into me. Obviously going through a number of tough stages in my life enabled easier adaptation to this thought process and execution, but you can do it too.  It's essentially the portray of outcome independence. Who's going to shoot you if you don't abide by what they want? Also, acknowledge that women like men who run with apathy, and see this character as the carrot at the end of the root.

3. If I'm brutally honest, the vast majority of top end quality (which for women is primarily judged by their looks) were, and still are, below the age of 24. I find it difficult to convince women above 23 (and even more so 25 or older) in time constrained moments that I'm anything more than a player. They ultimately assume a guy like me can have any woman he wants, therefore as women aged 24 to 32 are in some place between wanting to settle down with a future husband/father or currently in that position, they will look but not touch guys like me - with isolated exceptions.  This is why the most receptive women to very good looking men are under 24 or over 33. The young girls go with their hearts and sexual impulses, whilst the older women are in boring and unhappy relationships - and looking to cheat. The mid 20s to early 30s females are the most desperate to pin down the man who will marry them, even if this means being indifferent towards him in sexual and impulsive terms.

But this doesn't answer your point directly as much as it breaks down the barriers I perceive you to be encountering. If, as I suspect, you are on the lookout for attractive women In their late 20s, your best bet is to find them via a social (real life, not Internet) network, or less preferably in the workplace. This allows them to see your personality, and a gives them a level of reassurance that you're not just a pump and dump kind of guy. With all this said, I'd still screen for mature minded early 20s girls or women no older than 25 if I was in your position, simply because I can assure you that if you go for a woman same aged or older than you, her looks will dwindle much faster than yours. As much as you may love her as a partner and person, there will be an uncontrollable resentment on both parts in the future. Your resentment will derive from the fact you could have sex with more physically attractive women, and her animosity will manifest because she sees her male partner (you) as the younger looking and more attractive member of the relationship.

Hope this helps.