Women with high self-opinions

 

“He who holds the money holds the rules.”

  

In truth, such is the escalation of social media sycophancy and supplication received via both suck-up men and female peers, that it should be no surprise to any man with two eyes and decent judgement that the average female self-opinion has increased in line on a year-on-year basis.  It’s a sorry state of affairs if you ask me – oversized female self-opinion over and above any mere sign of humility genuine humility – but it is a compounding implication of life which isn’t leaving us any time soon.

Not that I’m going to be a total hypocrite here.  I have gone down on record within this blog, and I have said in words to many people, that somebody’s self-opinion of themself needs to be marginally higher than their objective (hence what they have to offer in real terms) value.  If it goes below the objectivity mark, then you run the risk of not fulfilling your potential.  However, if it goes too high above the reality of your offerings, a person will likely live day to day in waiting for something that will most likely never happen.

The pros and cons of women with high self-opinions?

There can be two main schools of thought in assessing this:

·       From a negative standpoint (and this will apply to most men), a woman with a high self-opinion will hold very high expectations of what a man should offer and provide for her.  In this case, it is accustomed that these women never think the average man is good enough for her, and she ends up settling for a man who cannot offer what she believes she deserves, or she goes for a man she loves for what he is (therefore his money, status and assets) rather than a man she loves for who he is (hence his physical attraction, personality and charisma).

·       From a positive standpoint (which applies to a small minority of men), a woman with a high self-opinion doesn’t just go for any man in order to satisfy her validation and attention needs.  Whilst these women do have high expectations which are much more leveraged than the average female benchmark, the plus point is that a high percentage of high self-opinionated women will not have received more pricks in her than a dartboard.  Whilst >99% of women will always want to be with a man who is less physically attractive than her, you will conceivably find that a small number of these women (around 20%) may, at least at a younger age, not be as resistant towards men of equal physical attractiveness in gender relative terms.

A recent anecdote

Around last October, an attractive long haired redhead walked in the gym who I had never seen before.  I doubt she was any older than 22.  She was, for me, the perfect height of around 5ft 5”.  A very nice figure, pale skin, and a couple of upper thigh tattoos which I’m quite partial to.  Her face was cute if not stand out.  Anything above an 8/10 in overall physical attractiveness would be too generous in my humble opinion, however a 7.75/10 may be seen as too harsh.  In other words, she was 8/10!

What was noticeable, perhaps after I had seen her for a few times, was that she walked with an air of authority which is rare for women I see these days.  Most women walk with poor body language – head down, shoulders slightly slouched, insecure feel, self-conscious, on the phone to avoid any human eye contact etc.  Whilst this redhead still did the familiar female head down looking at phone concurrent to walking thing, her stride was forceful and one that radiated a degree of confidence in the environment that existed.  Most probably fake confidence, but still a portray which could convince most naive and experience lacking men.

I’d seen her glancing in my direction on nearly every occasion she had been in the gym over those first couple of weeks, and one morning she was training on the next machine to me.  I struck up conversation, but it was transparent early on that her awkward demeanour translated to the high end, simultaneous to her confidence moving a step backwards.  It was clear she didn’t want to talk for long, and she concluded that she needed to crack on with her workout.  I walked off, although she did manage a smile at me as I did.

Over the next six months, the image of high self-opinion traits carried on as explained above.  I continued to see her looking over at me on numerous occasions, although on the rare times we passed each other I can only recall once when she looked me in the eye and smiled.  There was one day when I had no choice (due to a lack of room) but to perform my lunges so close to her stretching exercises.  I remember wearing a nice cologne that day, and it was amusing that another woman I had history with was looking on from five yards away. This was comical on two fronts, as not only could I sense the redhead enjoying the proximity between us, but the other woman is the kind of female who, after time getting to know her, is clearly someone who gets a kick out of fantasizing over a man she likes sexually pleasuring (most likely in a rough and aggressive manner) another hot woman.

There were also two occurrences when I was waiting for a lift on Monday mornings whilst dressed in my work clothes.  On both instances, the redhead walked out when I was there with further attraction in her eyes.  When she drove off, I couldn’t help but see the flick of the hair attraction clue in the mirror as she went by.

As harsh as this sounds, she drives a terrible clapped-out car.  It must be the worst car on the car park.  It is obvious she is a university student due to the times I have seen her leaving the gym, which also explains the beaten-up vehicle ownership in conjunction with a verbal articulation level that is above the average woman in there.  Poor in monetary terms, but reasonably clever you could say!  I’ve been a student myself…

With all this considered, I decided that I would soon have another chat to her when the situation best arose.  That situation came about just last week during a Saturday morning.  In my mind I knew this was likely more of a short-term sexual satisfaction objective (perhaps on her part too).

Well, whilst nothing is a surprise to me when it comes to women’s emotions, receptiveness, attitudes and psychology, it’s fair to say that this time she was even less engaging than the time before.  It wasn’t even worth striking up a second topic with her after a few seconds.  Once again, if ever any further proof was needed, that a woman being sexually attracted to a man is rarely enough to make her pursue with him on an intimacy basis.

Q-tip:

Never let a knock-back put you down.  A knock-back is often a by-product of your worth that situated you there in the first place.

A final thought

As nothing more than my will at looking at reality over what may seem like sour grapes, I think the hasty snub on her part may have been significantly assisted by the following factors:

1)    Even most women aged <24 still prefer a man who is less physically attractive than themselves.  Even at my relatively mature age, I’m pretty sure the vast majority of people would still say I’m 8/10 to 8.25/10. 

2)    As an interchangeable reason to 1), the last couple of weeks (prior to approaching her) in the UK had seen a lot of sunshine.  On the day I approached her, I was probably as tanned as I would be from a summer's week in southern Spain.  She is quite pale if the truth be told (although in the past it appeared she wasn’t a stranger to sunbeds).  This factor most likely added a little bit more inferiority in her mind.

3)    She drives an old-hat car, whilst I drive one of the better cars on the car park.  Although a woman undeniably prefers a man of higher status in wealth and asset terms, it is plausible to believe this gap is once more too wide for her comfort levels.

4)    Going back to a couple of weeks ago when we were working out very close to each other, I sensed it was her most fertile week back then.  In retrospect, it would have been far more productive to talk to her then in comparison to a couple of weeks later when she was back to menstruation phase.  My bad, I guess…

A final, final thought

In conclusion, women attaining high self-opinions are generally not great girlfriend material.  If they are not great girlfriend material, you can bet your bottom dollar that they are not good marriage material. 

Occasionally, especially for the most sought-after men, women with high self-opinions can be beneficial from the perspective of their low notch count, loyalty, and the unspoken knowledge that they chose you because of your male quality metrics. 

Finally, even the very high self-opinion of a woman will not be a weaponry strong enough to ease her insecurity and inferiority when faced with a man who acquires a longer sword than her, so to speak.

Women have little emotional balance

  

                                                You don’t have to run faster than the bear.                                                                            You just have to run faster than the guy next to you.”                                         (Jim Butcher)

  

Whilst you will still come across a small minority of women in the Western world who radiate a positive and optimistic demeanour in your social observations, the sad reality is that the large majority discharge a vision of negative presence.  You would like to think that in the last few weeks where it has been extremely hard to ignore the saddening and sickening images seen in Eastern Europe, people will have used these scenes as a way to appreciate what they have in life and to see their own problems in true perspective.  Unfortunately, perspective is an alien word to most.

With the exception of women on nights out when they place a mask over their emotions (although some women still look miserable in these places too), the common sight I see – whether it be in the gym, in the workplace, walking the street, in the supermarket etc – is a female with an expression of misery, seriousness, and a look of attaining the world’s problems on her shoulders.  Even as one of the least compassionate people out there, I still sometimes have a level of sympathy when I see this.  When all said and done, I sincerely only hold desires for good people to be happy.

Why the long face, sweetheart?

In truth, this “misery” should be seen for what it is in real terms.  Yes, sometimes it can be a woman who is just naturally miserable, but far more common is that it is not misery per se.  The reason you will see women, in particular younger women (aged 18 to 30), looking so downbeat is a by-product of the self-consciousness within themselves.  Self-consciousness, and her twin (but not identical twin) sister by the name of insecurity, bring about an uncontrollable, subconscious and defaulted disposition to constantly possess a long face.

Although I can recall many miserable looking women as far as my memory allows, there is no doubting in my mind that the general female occurrence of looking miserable (to reiterate – because of her self-consciousness) has compounded year on year for the last couple of decades.  But why has this been the case, you may be wondering?

Granted, no scientific reasoning can be given as far as I can locate (scientific studies based on female/human emotion are generally a waste of time anyway, such is the reliance on a person’s honesty for validity and credibility), however if you want my two pennies on the main causes, I offer the following:

·       Social Media (Facebook and Instagram mainly).  This has manifested an obsession to try and be popular, combined with a constant conveyor belt of seeing other physically attractive women – whether that be women in their social circles, or celebrity women they follow.  When someone is persistently reminded of numerous popular and attractive women out there, it can only result in said woman looking on in frustration and concern to her own level.

·       Female competition.  With more women than ever using aids to look more physically attractive than they naturally are – whether by the use of make-up, cosmetics, surgical enhancements, or photoshop improvements – once more women are always wondering who is over their shoulder in respect to another woman stealing the show. 

·       Celebrity lifestyle exposure.  Whether it be the woman in the celebrity spotlight via her own right, or the woman in the arms of a celebrity and wealthy man, any random woman not living this life (hence >99.9% of women) will look on in envy of what could be.  Rather than appreciate what we have, the human mind, and in particular the female mind, is channelled to think of what we do not have.

·       Frustration in their own life.  Most people are in jobs they gain very little satisfaction with or liking for.  This applies to men as much as women, but on the basis men have greater perspective than women, women will become more bitter about this predicament.  Likewise, most everyday people are not living the high life in their social time.  Once again though, men generally require less thrill and change up, in comparison to women who need drama, gossip and excitement to broadcast to others.  When women are, usually, on the wrong side of both circumstances, disappointment in life is a hard face to conceal.

·       A shortage of male quality.  As life becomes harder for ‘Average Joe’ to make ends meet, the gap between female expectancy in life and the feasible providing level of the average man has become wider and wider.  A woman who holds standards too high (standards higher than her physical attractiveness can offer men) in men will either stay single and lonely or, more likely, settle for a man who will never be the man she truly wanted to be with.  When this occurs, she ends up resenting both the man she is with, and life.

·       WhatsApp groups.  Not dissimilar to the first explanation with regards to social media, WhatsApp or similar facilities have also been a detriment to women’s happiness.  The Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO) and need to be popular will nearly always rule a woman’s mind over making logical and sensible decisions, but the simple truth is that women now can barely go a few minutes of life without looking at what is going on, and who is living a more exciting (although usually exaggerated in excitement) existence.  Imagine also how much bitching must go on in these female WhatsApp groups.  This can’t lead to too many smiles, that’s for sure.

So, in essence, all the above offers a clear reasoning to why a woman lives most of her life in worry, frustration, envy, and negativity.  This is in place of what it should be - happiness, optimism, positivity, and appreciation of what she has in life.

The flip side of misery

Nevertheless, what you will often find (for men who are brave enough to interact with women they do not know personally) is a woman who plays the total opposite role to what you saw when she had her head down when she walked past you, or when she was in continual viewing and typing of her phone when stood or sat near you.  A fair proportion of women will likely ignore a man if he did try to interact – either by walking quickly away in the street or pretending she can’t hear or see you in vain attempt to hide behind the headphones she is wearing – but some women will interchange in conversation, such is the greater urge of some male attention.

When she does (kindly!) stop still or take her headphones off for a minute or two, it will be no coincidence if she starts to talk a lot about herself.  In the immediate interaction, this is a good thing (as opposed to a woman just giving abbreviated answers) because it will ease the pressure on you to produce ceaseless topics to talk about.  The chances are she will ask you next to nothing about yourself, but don’t let this dissuade you early on.

In this period of responding to your questions, the strong likelihood is that her answers will derive in a form of presenting how exciting, popular, positive, busy, dramatic, and fast-paced her rollercoaster life is.  Most men (including my former self) can often be a little disheartened when this occurs, as they will believe she has very little time for him should they be a couple, but with experience you will soon start to realize that this exaggeration does not align with the reality. 

Q-tip 1:

An easy formula to use when assessing an exaggerating woman is this:

A woman’s verbal execution, divided by 2.5 = The actuality

This formula can be used in both the positive and negative language she uses, by and large.

And this over expressing of her lifestyle can be an education to abide by when dating or in a relationship with her too.  The big advantage you have when past the interaction base is that you can now see the misalignment with your own two eyes, as opposed to reading between the lines of what she is telling you.

How does a man deal with it all?

Ultimately, the only way to ever be relaxed with this female extreme behaviour is to be the cool, calm and collected cucumber around her.  When she is down, listen to her, but know that nine times out of ten she will not be as depressed as she makes out.  As the statistics back up, more women threaten to commit suicide, but more men go through with committing suicide.  I think this tells its own story…

On the other hand, whether it be in the immediate or post interaction, fathom that her overstated life preoccupations are not what she verbalizes.  Much of the time she is telling you how occupied, rapid and sought-after she is will, but in practice, it will be less than half the amount she claims.  Much of this time will be spent watching TV on her own.

A final thought

With all this said, if a woman is using made-up excuses to not see you due to the bullshit reasons as explained above, the facts of the matter are it is one of two things:

1)    She is testing you in the early stages to see first how clingy and needy you are, and second, how much you have going on in your life too.

2)    If she does this on more than two occasions (and two occasions is the allowance as an absolute maximum - if nothing but to cut her some slack if she is, in the unlikely event, telling the truth), make no more contact with her other than respond if she messages you.  The strong likelihood is she is not serious about taking things further.

Q-tip 2:

When a woman genuinely needs you, listen to her, and give constructive, honest and compassionate thoughts to her situation.  When she claims she is so busy and popular, treat it as water off a duck’s back, in addition to playing fire with fire in discretely showing you are equally up to your neck in it in this respect.  A woman is more attracted to a man when fighting for his time, and her heart is repelled when comprehensive to him striving for her time.