Saturday 27 August 2016

Female ageing causes female bitterness

“See a smile, and see an optimist. See a smirk, and see a realist. 
See a frown, and know an eternal bitter and twisted pessimist.”

It was a cold winter Monday morning in the gym queue five minutes before the opening hours of 6.30am.  The doors leading to the reception are always closed and usually locked, therefore the half dozen eager (or just short of time) people waiting for the opening make small chit chat inside the foyer area.  To be honest, I find most people at that time slightly annoying, but I guess I can’t be too critical as it suits my lifestyle convenience to train at that particular early hour.

There is this one woman named Sharon, and she either goes by herself or, most commonly, with her 60 year old plus mother.  Some could say this is really sweet – a daughter spending so much time involving her mum in a social environment – and as a man who has a great relationship with his own mother, I totally adhere to this, but the reality is Sharon has no friends, and in truth, no life outside of work.  Sharon is in her late 30’s, and although thin, she is looking every year of her age.

Quite a few of my buddies at the gym had heard first or second hand that Sharon fancied me.  It made me chuckle early last year, as she found out that I was going to Australia on my own.  She put two and two together and found five, assuming all had gone wrong with my girlfriend at the time, and that I was single.  Two things wrong with this thought process: One, I was still with my girlfriend who was more than two full grades above Sharon in physically attractiveness, and 12 years her junior.  Two, I wouldn’t date Sharon if she was the last woman on earth.  Porn would be more satisfying and far less hassle.  The lack of reward in relation to the hassle to go with it would be a no-brainer to never venture there.  Any man with options should think and act in the same way.

Although she is a clever, ambitious, hard-working and articulate woman who you could say holds all the non-visual attributes in equating to a great long term girlfriend, and she is good to talk to in so far as you can have a decent conversation with (something very rare with most women), there has always been this chip on her shoulder kind of approach that cannot be concealed to a person who is half clued up on listening ability, body language, and observation of human behaviour.  In fact, she is probably very evenly balanced – with a chip on both shoulders.

Any woman with no female friends, who spends more time with her mother than anyone else, who works seven days a week, who is admitting of being self-obsessed with money, and who doesn’t even go into her company office at all despite being given the licence to work from home, in my cynical view has huge personality disorders.  It just isn’t the norm, and although I’m an advocator of not following suit and refraining from being a servant to social conformity, this is a couple of steps too far.  It only draws to bring about a human being who cannot accept people for who they are, and who cannot take the high road when times get tough or they collide with people who push them off track.  You don’t have to like someone or even get on with them to still use them to your advantage

Back to the gym queue.  When I got there marginally after the two of them, there was only another old chap waiting.  In the reception area (which is not usually entered) stood a skinny, cute girl in her early 20’s talking to the receptionist of similar age.  They were giggling and most likely talking about weekend drama that was predominantly fiction and partly true – as most women that age do, and should be taken with a pinch of salt.  When the receptionist let us in, Sharon and her mum decided to have a go at the cute girl, in quite aggressively informing her she shouldn’t be waiting where she was situated. Big deal!

The cute girl took it well at first, just smiling in disbelief of what had been said.  Shaz and Mum went for it a bit more, to which the cute bird hit her with the killer punch:
“I haven’t come to the gym to get in an argument with an old woman.”
That was gold dust to me, hiding my laughter, but the mum pointed out how disrespectful she had been.  Sharon, needless to say, pretty much echoed every word her antagonizing mum spelt out.  Then the receptionist got involved, trying to diffuse the situation by some words to the effect that her dad knew the two of them.  “You know nothing about us!”, replied the mum.  The receptionist tried to convince them she was only making small-talk to cloud over the friction, but the bitter gruesome twosome were having none of it.  Quite frankly, it was pointless, needless, bitter, and twisted.

The instigated hostility they showed in aiming at the cute girl’s alleged queue hopping had absolutely nothing to do with their accusation reasoning, and everything to do with being jealous and bitter of a younger, fresher, hotter woman in their peripheral vision.  You will see this all the time.  Yes, by and large women do become friendlier and easier to talk to as they get older, but this is through necessity – due to decreasing attention they get from loser men - more than any other subsidiary factor.  But this “friendlier” and more engaging nature is not to be mistaken with becoming bitterer, and nothing epitomizes this undeniable occurrence when younger and hotter same gender rivals are within their striking distance.  This is all the more noticeable when men they are attracted to are within the same breathing space to all parties as explained.

This tale of events can be seen throughout the female age food chain.  Mid 20’s girls who have had a few years going out on the town may vanish once they start to see late teenage and early 20’s rivals appear in greater number.  Late 20’s women in the office will not take kindly to the company employing a young, good looking woman who will take much of the beta male attention away from them.  The 30’s women will know they have less power with men (even mediocre men) than they possessed five or ten years ago, and they may contrive a pregnancy to mitigate his straying eyes, and hands.  Women in their 40’s and beyond don’t improve much on this velocity of bitterness, until they finally accept the fight is no longer worth fighting. 

Compare this to men.  I have seen some older men look at me with hostile, jealous and bitter expressions, but this is also pronounced with men of similar age or younger too.  Widely and generally spread though, there will be far less of this negative emotion shown by older men onto younger men, sometimes even to the point where the older man looking on is reminiscing of you to what he once was.  A na├»ve younger man could draw to the conclusion that the older man is gay, but the more likely justification is he sees in you what he once saw in himself.

But more relevant to this is the fact that men, whilst not happy with getting older, fatter, balder, greyer, saggier or wrinklier, do not suffer as much from physical ageing, and the deficiencies that naturally form with age, in terms of attracting the opposite sex: 
  • For one, the vast majority of women don’t want a man as physically alluring as them, so if you take a female physical attractiveness average of approximately 6/10 (applicable to women aged from 18 to 40), this leaves plenty of older men being able to secure a half-decent woman.  They should, even with excess weight added to all the aforementioned physical slides, be able to grade up in looks terms by a fair margin. 
  • Second, as has been said many times before, a man’s physical appearance shortcomings can be disguised somewhat by other non-visual factors – mainly status and wealth – but by many other aspects women find desirable too.  
Six months after her initial hints towards me (now around September time), Sharon asked if I was going away again.  I told her “we” were going to Venice and Florence next month.  Her face dropped quicker than a lead balloon.  A month or so later one of the other receptionists had to enter the foyer, where we waited, to switch off the fire alarm.  With no conscious intention for Sharon to see, I looked at the receptionist’s fine ass as she bent down.  Sharon caught me looking.  She, and her mum, have never been as warm in conversation since those two events…

A final thought

A decent percentage (although still a minority) of women in their mid 30’s to late 40’s, and sometimes older still, do go searching for younger men.  You can blame the need for social proof due to social media, or the odd cougar movie, but at the end of the day it is what it is.  This younger man seeking dynamic is also apparent with women in their late 20’s too, although not as common because a woman at that age is in a better position to tie down a male provider of similar age or older.  In any case, if they secure this younger man he is usually of low calibre. 

A woman ideally desires to be with a man who is wealthier and higher status than her, but the vast majority of these men will be with younger and hotter women than the older woman who is pursuing him.  This leaves a woman past her physical beauty prime to seek out differing motivations, and it often coincides with her being that bit more advanced in her own career, earnings and assets.  This differing emotion often manifests in a psychological need to feel young, beautiful and special, in counteracting the back of the mind doubts that the best days are behind her.  By finding and locking down a man who is a few years her junior, the front end results can paper over the cracks of inevitable later frustration.

This later frustration is portrayed in the way of her projected blame onto the younger man for being too immature, poor, selfish, uncommitted and unambitious, but deep down she knows the true frustration is the voice within that criticizes her own current predicament.  It’s difficult and even alien for her to admit to poor choices derived from the past, so she has to blame someone or something else.       

Saturday 20 August 2016

Good looking man facing challenges and tribulations

“The most successful salesmen are the ones who win work through their mistakes.”

It is always a bit of a running joke or, more so, obliviousness to the happenings when a top end god gifted looking man faces frequent obstacles in finding a woman he finds attractive who will date him.  Women will be more comprehensive, even if silent or denying on the topic, to why this illogical scenario occurs.  Men (outside of the <1% of men it is consistently happening to) are pretty much lacking total understanding to this possibility, because they think women are only looking for the richest, most famous, and best looking men.  As stated many times on this blog, the latter is most certainly not the case.  

Regarding this subject, reader Bryce puts a question to me based on the challenges he faces being a very good looking man (assume last word should read "me"):

What if you're rated 9-11 in looks? (Not my own judgement but others over the years). I find the really attractive avoid me, but younger women 6-8 flock to my 

My response:

My first query would be with the 11/10 grade some third parties have said you are rated at?  Not the over-scale number as such, but any man with unblemished and perfect looks would surely be snapped up as a high profile model, and this can then lead to high status beyond the profession of just walking down a catwalk or any other clothing exploitation.  With this in mind, I’ll go on the basis you are a 9/10.  Bear in mind that, on my relative rigorous marking with respect to physical attractiveness (for both men and women), I place the likes of Enrique Iglesias, Sean O’Pry and Cristiano Ronaldo as 9/10 to 9.25/10. 

The above first paragraph to my response is worthwhile, because it hints at the two rules of thumb that women seek out in a long term male partner:
·         Women want a man who is less physically attractive than their own female equivalent physical looks grade.
·         Women want a man who is of higher status (both socially and occupational) and wealthier than their own equivalence.

The reason I believe it is critical to understand the two magic desired factors are because, in an ideal world, a woman finds a man who ticks both boxes.  This “ideal” man is firstly that delegate who she still finds an urge to have sex with, but visually she steals the show when out in public together.  By no mean coincidence, this man will be 10% to 15% less eye catching than her.  Secondly, this man has a higher profile than her in social and professional terms, with the wealth facility to give her a better life. 

What this ultimately means is as follows, with minority exceptions:
  • A woman above the age of 23 will choose an average looking man with a good job over a good looking man with an average job.
  • A woman under the age of 23 could go either way on her choice based on the above two options.
  • A woman of any age will always take an average looking (and probably even ugly) famous man over a very good looking man who fulfills a “normal” job.
  • All else equal, a woman will choose a man less physically attractive than her in comparison to a man who is as, or better, looking than her.
  • A woman will, in majority cases, choose a good looking man with high status over an average looking man of lower status.

The pertinent and highlight point is the last one.  This is why the likes of Iglesias, O’Pry and Ronaldo would never have any problems finding top class women.  Sure, they may get rejected by one or two who have egos and trust issues bigger than their hearts, but most women will take oversight to this due to what they have to gain.

A woman’s principles, preferences and inclinations are all thrown out the window when she is placed in a situation that could benefit her life, even if it means going against the tide of normal service.  This is why you can never take anything women say on emotional topics seriously or on face value.  They all have their price, or timing desperations

Advice to Bryce

As I can relate to first-hand, your dealings align, to a certain extent, with my experiences.  That is: Cute women are often more positively responsive to advances from good looking men than hot women. 

However, I would change the parameters somewhat.  As you documented, I also think that a decent share of cute women between 7/10 to 7.75/10 are open to taking things on with men better looking than them, but where we differ is my view that anything below 7/10 results in widespread antagonism, hostility and jealousy that belongs to them feeling too inferior.  Also, I don’t find that lower end hot women (8/10 to 8.5/10) are very fond in being with an 8.5/10 to 9/10 looks rated man, such is their accustomed greater comforting feeling in historically being with above average looking (7/10 to 7.75/10) men.  Women from 8.75/10 upwards are then more receptive, because a very good looking man isn’t instinctively out of her league when she is dolled up.  Nevertheless, such is the world we live in today that most women at the top end of female hotness think they can score a famous man, many of them keep waiting beyond the point where their peak beauty has been reached and the slide has commenced.

In terms of numbers, you have to bear in mind that although 90% of women will not want to date you, there are still many more cute and hot women that sit in the world than men of your looks bracket.  So for every one man as good looking as you, there will be 30 to 40 women ranging from cute to hot (mainly cute it has to be said).  So although you will get a lot of refusals, 3 to 4 of them (out of the 30 to 40) will take you on.  Not great odds I accept, but still better than being invisible like most men are, or being taken for a sucker.  Good screening and character judgement will assist you.

With regards to strategies, I throw these at you:
  • Whereas average looking men are better off being proven by female pre-selection, a very good looking man needs to show a level of attainability.  The “I’ve just come out of a long-term relationship” line is the best quick fix method, as it shows you can hold down a relationship without presumption your current girlfriend (if you told the target women this was the case) is much hotter than the woman you are hitting on.
  • Whereas average looking men can get away with a level cockiness, a good looking man showing this same barometer reading will reap negatives.  This is because a man with blessed top end male looks is already hanging on the edge of god-like figure perception with women, therefore a level of modesty is required.  This isn’t to be mistaken with not looking or acting confident, but it does mean a fine balance should be met.  A woman once said to me that women want a nice guy - who is cheeky.  I think there is some truth and logic to this.
  • Whereas an average looking man may attract women through a more moody and distant demeanour, a good looking man needs to portray what I explain as positive approachability.  This most definitely is not walking with a smile wider than the Pacific Highway, but a mild smirk should be sufficient.
  • No negs are allowed.  Negs are for men hitting on women who are noticeably better looking.  I’ve tried negs before, and not once has it done me any good.  A very good looking man using a neg opener on a cute woman will allow her little brain to think you are taking the piss.  Fine for men who need to make a mark on her, but not for men who already have. 
  • Use situational openers.  Make it a genuine question that forces her to talk on neutral basis.  Make sure she doesn’t just talk about herself, but make sure even more that you don’t do the same.  Get her to know you have an element of likeability, attainability, commitment and modesty.
  • Similar to pre-selection, be careful how far you take this.  Your target woman will expect you are a playa, and can consequently take your pick of female existence.  Whilst women’s sexual organs are attracted to men who appeal to many other women, their egos don’t like this circumstance.  Basically, a woman will give an average looking playa more leeway than a good looking playa.  In essence, neither confirm nor deny your playa ways if she brings it up.
  • In their bizarre and innate character build-ups, many women are attracted to average looking men who have cheated on women in the past.  Again, there is a need for an average looking man to prove himself.  Even if you have acted out past infidelity, as a good looking man (who isn’t famous) you need to illustrate being a faithful prospective partner.  I often use words along the lines that I’ve enjoyed my single life phases – hence slept with many women during these times – but once in a committed relationship I have never cheated on anyone.
  • Mingle in bigger cities.  The bigger the place, the more glamorous (although granted, the more status and attention seeking) women there are.  These women are more open-minded, and they will at the very least be more engaging and easy to talk you.
But if there is one last piece of advice I’d give you, it is to not feel resigned to the reality as explained.  You still need to approach every woman as if each and every one of them will say yes to you, and if she declines, it is her loss and no skin off your nose.  If you have the attitude of resignation due to the predicament in making women feel like you are out of their league (btw, I’m speaking out loud generally, not about you personally), you may as well be a man who thinks all women are out of his league. 

Saturday 13 August 2016

How a beta can become stronger

“Life is a simple concept.  It’s only people who make it complicated.”

A reader makes a few interesting points on the back of this previous post:

Hello Vi Nay,

I have really enjoyed your post, the story about Bunny and Ben is definitely fantastic ! You said : « If a man doesn't hit her emotional buttons early on, it isn't going to ever happen. Chemistry isn't something that you wake up with out of the blue.». I agree with these words but as you know a woman or girl can't get any chemistry with beta male because a beta male looks unattractive, his obvious lack of confident, his betattitude (beta manners) are immediately detected by the girl he tempt to approach. As you said a girl will only say yes to a beta male if she doesn't get the attention she desires with an attractive alpha male around her. My question is : You seems to say that a girl get chemistry only with an
attractive man = alpha, on other side the chemistry in a natural feeling no one can't create it, so : HOW a beta male can hit a girl emotional buttons early ? For me, a beta male will always suffer until he gets conscience that his manner to value a good looking girl immediately high value than him will make him unhappy and treated like shit in the future. Without acting like alpha is impossible for a beta to hit a girl emotional buttons early. What do you think about that ?

My tips (with additions to the response I gave him):

If a beta male insists or persists in staying beta, or he refuses to change even with knowledge to how the world and women work, he will forever make the same mistakes and sustain the failures and rejections that accompany the consequential choice that these characteristics produce.  Enough said...

The way a beta can enhance not just his fortunes with women, but life generally too, is as follows:

  • Put on some muscle.  Not in a beefcake way, but enough to stand out above the average guy.  This more dominant body frame will cloud some of his mediocre facial projection, and make women find him more instinctively attractive.  Unless he has very high status, a man without a presence is a man who radiates zero attention onto himself.
  • Dress more stylish and unique.  Similar to the body frame, women's eyes will project more easily onto him as opposed to the invisibility he once attained.
  • Smell good.  Not many men wear a classy eau de toilette on frequent occasions.  This is mainly due to fear of releasing moths from the wallet, but partly due to fear of what other men will think.  Who gives a crap about what other men think?  Not me.  Wear it daily, but purchase a few in refraining from predictability.  I can assure you that six to eight sprays of a good fragrance will leave a smile on women’s faces when they encroach onto your vicinity, and as a ramification they will find you more sexually arousing than just a soap and water combo.  A man smelling good and fresh can somewhat conceal his lack of physical allure.
  • Maximize your career profile, without compromising other appealing factors.  I’m a great believer that, generally speaking, the more ambitious a man is in work, the less ambitious he can with in his outside work life (as ambition usually comes with working longer hours with more stress involved).  Nevertheless, a good job that arrives with high occupational status and earnings undeniably attracts just about every woman with a pulse.  Bear in mind though that a man with money is only as good as his game, to the point where too much money – and the over expenditure he distributes on his loved one – will actually repel her over time.  Why?  Because she never had to work hard to please him. 
  • Get involved with a social proof group, no matter how local to the environment this is. Even a beta male - looking, acting and dressing in exactly the same way as always - will attract women far easier when he belongs to a "popular" group. Women, especially young women, love male high social status, and hanging out in a well-known gathering will not only open many more opportunities with women, but it will make him far more appealing to them.
  • Treat women like crap. An extreme view I know, but far more advantageous than treating her like a princess.
  • If the above jerkiness brings about too much self-guilt, at least develop a mindset of "women are easily replaceable." This adapts a far more efficient attitude onto women and life, and the female mind and sexual organs are uncontrollably attracted onto an apathetic viewing.
  • Portray positive body language and confidence.  Illustrate this every day, and everywhere.  It is far easier to learn and deliver non-verbal demeanour than to become a natural verbal executor (if speaking doesn't come naturally to you). Remember that women, and people generally, notice and focus on body language and tone way above the content of words. Use it in the ratio that benefits most.
  • Eradicate bad habits and actions from your character portfolio.  Walk with stand-out posture rather than slouched shoulders, a hood over your head, and big earphones on.  Negative posture reflects a lack of confidence, but it is emblematic of high insecurity and self-consciousness.  These habits belong to women, but women can get away with it due to primarily and almost solely being judged on their looks in time constrained moments.  Men can’t get away with it, because they are judged by women far more on attitude than physical looks.  There are times to go toe to toe with women – and replicating what they do - when it comes to the mind games, but acting in body language terms like a woman is accustomed to do so is a no-go zone.
  • Learn interaction strategy (aka game).  Work out what makes women tick emotionally, and use it accordingly to enhance your attractiveness and noticeability when approaching or interacting with women.  Nevertheless, don’t go overboard with game and learn too many role play openers.  Less is more in this case, as it can border over to a man trying too hard.  Women see through this, so a teaspoon in these instances trumps a tablespoon.
  • Study red pill concepts.  The world isn’t perfect, no matter how we may desire it to be, and nothing epitomizes this more than women’s choices in the men they are attracted to.  Further realize that even when women make logical decisions, it is often down to being boxed into a corner (hence having fewer options than before, or an urge to settle down) than a natural attraction onto the chosen man.
  • As a by-product of interaction strategy and red pill, learn about female emotional psychology in the form of blogs like this one.  Don’t expect learning tools on bookshelves to help you out, as this literature is predominantly written by male suck-up lapdogs, feminists, or ego-seeking women.  They won’t give you the truth or objectivity.  Once you work out women, and their mentality, decisions, and physical decline, you will be in control of your own destiny.
  • Have thorough comprehension that your overall average physical attractiveness – as >95% of men will fall into – is actually an advantage rather than a show-stopper.  This is all the more relevant in terms of your mediocre facial features.  All else being on parity, women prefer to be in relationships with men who are less physically attractive than they are, and this includes cute and hot women.  Don’t think that every average looking man alongside a much hotter female partner is a professional footballer or a millionaire.  The numbers just do not stack up this way.  The majority of these men are just run of the mill earners.  With this in mind, strive to grade up by 10% to 15% (or more) on your own objective rating.  If you think you’re a 6/10, a 7/10 cute chick is more than attainable.  A 7/10 looking man should be with a 7.5/10 looking woman at least.   
  • Finally, force it upon yourself to think like nobody is watching you.  Rejection, failure, shortcomings, and trepidation of how people respond to you would almost entirely be erased if you were the only person in the environment when acting out the relevant moves.

It’s unrealistic, although not impossible, to tick every box above.  For example, I have never held desires to belong to a high social proof group, despite knowing this would have given me easier and more opportune avenues with cute and hot women.  I guess this is partly down to having less necessity due to having a unique look and character, but mainly due to, from my experience, knowing that men in the local popular groups are generally unintelligent and up their own arse guys who are not enjoyable to be around.  Whilst I may criticize perennial nice guys in their dealings with women, I would take their company any day of the week over a well-known jerk who just so happens to know a few decent women.

But if a man can look to improve his overall existence by abiding by even just a few of the points given, he will unquestionably be much better off than before.

I’m from the camp that believes beta males are often afraid to stand up to a woman due to fear of upsetting her, throwing away any chances of getting laid, or just downright sympathy when the tears roll down her face in a cry for help.  So if you are one of these men, allow me to throw this one at you:

When a woman reaches her 90th birthday, possibly not far from her final days, she will be looking out the window in her rocking chair and reminiscing over all the past men in her life.  If totally honest due to no longer having to conceal the lies that brought about her survival, she will know that the male hearts she broke - and the lies, manipulations, contrived strategies, and a lack of contrition that accompanied it - would outweigh the nasty infliction she received in return.  Simply put, she used far more men than men who used her.

Saturday 6 August 2016

Do what you want to do

“Pessimism is evil, dangerous, and no benefit to anyone. 
And when you feel like it has struck, the only option is to take the high road.”

If I could give only one advice phrase to a young boy venturing into the world of the unknown (apart from the great line of: “Don’t listen to what women say, but watch what they do”), it would be: “Do what you want to do.”  Purists will of course claim this mentality is too selfish to get on in life, but a purist belongs to the mainstream mass male or female group who never tell the truth in how the world goes round.

The recent Brexit referendum, in my personal situation, is a case in point to explain why I feel this way.  I’d like to think I’m a pretty smart, sensible and pragmatic person who knows how to balance life’s enjoyments without compromising my responsibilities.  I work hard, put money away, seek advice on financial growth potential, and basically it all manifests into a medium to long term profitable future plan.  Then poof, a verdict of this kind, after all the many years and hard graft to get there, sends you tumbling many steps down the ladder.  The foundations are still strong, but the structure has been wobbled.  Much of this now needs to be re-built, although I have to confess that the immediate personal negative repercussions have somewhat been wiped out for now.  But that’s my problem…

I’ve had some heated debates about the whole Brexit debacle with those who chose an exit path from Britain’s involvement in the European Union, but it is time to move on.  If you’re dealt an ugly hand, you’ve got to play with what you’re given.  Nevertheless, if there is one good thing I can take from it all then it has only further reinforced my mind that I shall choose the time to hang up my working gloves, do what I desire to do in between now and then, and take a back seat somewhere more enjoyable.  This is many years from now, but it will be the date I set.  If I don’t set it, and stick to it, outside influences will only take me off path.  And this isn’t even accounting for any external forces of uncontrollable nature that may come before.  I appreciate this possibility as much as anyone.

Your decisions made with friends will be tested.  It will be easy to think that you always need to go along with the crowd in fear of missing out or being less appreciated down the line, but neither will happen, certainly not in a drastic or hold back way, if more than a couple of times you take the road you want rather than the one they sway you towards.

Family is another item similar to friends, although you should form a stronger loyalty here, even though the younger man’s mind will lean towards your male buddies.  If family members are giving you as much as what you return, keep this equilibrium in the subconscious mind.  If they give less, you give less.  If a certain member goes the extra yard for you, do likewise in return.  Always look after your mother and father, but equally do not get emotionally dragged into thinking you have to give too much.  At the end of the day, it was their decision or poor planning that evolved for you to be here, and not your choice. 

And of course, onto the favourite topic – girls and women.  Nothing epitomizes abiding by the “Do what you want to do” phrase more than with girls and women you become intimately involved with, or those you allow yourself to be infatuated with.  There is hardly a woman out there in this spectrum who will not put herself before you, and it’s no coincidence that the minority who are or have been performing this act – of placing her man first - are with men who are putting themselves first.  It’s kind of ironic, right?

Whether this is gifts, money, future plans, college destinations, long vacations she plans to take (often without you), evaluating how much time you spend with her or your friends, your expenditure should never be greater than her likewise exertions.  She has to know in her own mind that she is investing in the relationship as much, if not more, in spite of verbally telling you she loves the things you always do for her.  She will love them more, and be more gratifying of them, when they are exceptions rather than the norm.

Because, women will tell you all the things they visualize as the movie-made perfect boyfriend.  That is the boy who opens doors for her, treats her like a princess, spends time, money and endless endeavours to please her, kisses her rosy ass, acts like she is the only girl in the world, and the one who would put his own life on hold for her.  Ensure you do the opposite, with isolated deliverables of the aforementioned.  The reason women love a man is because they have to work for his love.  The man who gives it too easily, too blatantly, too much, and too soon, is the man who they become bored and unappreciative of.

So in summary, put yourself first.  Don’t be frightened in being alone for more than ten minutes.  Don’t be anxious of losing one or two friends, or girlfriends, along the way.  Don’t feel the need to be predictable, and in turn be challenging and unique.  Don’t broadcast your life on social media, or worse still, post pretty kiss ass messages to women about their relative profiles.  Be mysterious, where women strive to find out more about you.  Don’t look too happy in being anywhere, but equally throw in good time smiles and positivity.  Be as confident as you can be within your natural character.

But if one last piece of advice could be given, in priority to any of the above, it would be to not care about what people think of you.  I’m a firm believer that, in assistance with uncontrollable nature of ageing, women look older than men in general terms at the same age due to worrying about what the outside world thinks of them.  This approach is stressful, energy-zapping, fatigue intensifying, and absolutely unproductive.  As I always say, life is hard enough as it is.  Don’t make it any harder on yourself.