Tuesday 28 October 2014

Watch her change as she ages

“We all have to live in this world, but not all of us have to play by the rules in this world.”

There seems to be quite a substantial amount of talk amongst wishfully thinking (but fallacy acting) women, nice guy creeps and fortunate realists with regards to where female external and internal attractiveness stands, and how it evolves, improves and fragments.  I guess most people have their own agendas, but even with apparent self-motives you would like to think a person will always speak through their honest veins in order to make the best life possible moving forwards.  You can run from the truth for so long, but it has a nasty habit of biting you in the ass, sooner rather than later.

From a general perspective, these are the common trends you will find with women as they grow through their years:
  • Women become friendlier as they get older.
  • Women take more emotional risks as they get older.
  • Women bond more solid and loyal friendships with other females as they get older.
  • Women produce an “easier-going” attitude and demeanour as they get older.
  • Women become less insecure as they get older.

Nevertheless, the above points are not a simple case of a direct line.  The below chart that I have devised will illustrate further:

There are three measurements against the ascending age.  Beauty is self-explanatory, and as you would expect, the ego is pretty much aligned with the level of the respective physical attractiveness.  It peaks around the age of 20.  But the stand out pinnacle point is the age of her expectancy level as the 30th birthday encroaches.  Sure, her ego isn’t at the level of her younger (and hotter) former self of the last decade, but the material world we live in the form of glamour magazines and reality television programs have led her to a misconception that she can demand more than ever.  This is, somewhat strangely, even though she has less to offer.  She has less to offer because women are primarily and high-proportionally judged on their physical beauty. 

The main reason women have a peak expectancy level at this stage of life is because they can form a misconception to believe they are just as eye catching as they ever were.  The whole social network “you go girl” phenomenon has forced this to be the result.  And as they have, or should, have grown into “better” people – hence personality, sexual knowledge and earnings – they raise the bar for men to jump over.  When men are less forthcoming, the easiest solution to ease the painful and resentful mind is for a woman to blame it on the consensus that hardly any “real” men willing to grow up exist anymore. 

To a point, they are right, because it cannot be denied that more men resort to video games, internet porn and independent pastimes than their equivalent aged male counterparts of generations from our past.  So the female argument is to be convinced that a lack of male takers is down to male immaturity rather than her fragmenting physical allure. 

The male counter-active argument, and thus the more likely accurate reason, is that more men are contemplating the risk v reward analysis of settling down, marriage and kids.  The reward of “guaranteed sex” is perhaps not worth the risk of potentially losing your savings and independence.  More weight is now being placed onto the possible risks over and above the bias towards the short term rewards.  That said, most women will still find their way to the big wedding day and ultrasound department, because most men are still afraid of loneliness.  It will just be a gradual decrease over many decades. 

And when you view comments on blogs, or even hear the occasional male honest voice, you will conclude that current married men, many who are happily married, confess that if they were at the same age as when they became a husband, they wouldn’t go through it again.  If even only a few present married men admit to this, rest assured that there must be innumerable men thinking the same things.  As for divorcees, and men who have been taken to the cleaners with concern to depleting marriage exuberance and consequential divorce, a good percentage of them wouldn’t re-write the chapter with a different woman.  Like the marginal amounts of men who are willing to face up to modern day female habits, requirements and demands in the western world, it simply isn’t worth it.         

The female function is not tuned to be appreciative over a long term basis.  Sometimes it is not even tuned over a short term.  A woman’s brain is functioned to be expectant, with fragmenting gratitude being the by-product consequence.  The more someone gives, the more the other person wants.  This is just a simple case of female human nature.  And with exceptions, the general rule is: the hotter the woman, the more she is likely to be this way.

And a final thought…

If you are a very decent to good (or very good) looking man, and you have noticed that older women are hitting on you far more than younger cute or hot women are doing likewise (if at all), you are certainly not imagining things.  During times of this nature, knowledge of female sexual emotional psychology and illogical processing is a must, because it can leave a less clued up guy scratching his head or even doubting his value.  

What you find in this case, with the more naïve men out there, is an automated thought process in believing the only reason older and less attractive women approach you is because their younger and hotter counterparts are either with better looking boyfriends than you or guys who are blessed with social status, money, penis size or charisma to compensate for their lesser looks.  Women who date down will tell you this is the case, but the simple reality is that so few men in percentage terms have any of these credentials.  Put another way: there are far, far fewer men with any of those blessings as mentioned in comparison to the vast number of couples where the woman is the visually stand out feature of the two.  Now start to draw your own conclusions behind this undeniable reality…

Logic would suggest that hot men are most attracted to the hottest women, and hot women are most attracted to the hottest men.  Similarly, logic would also suggest that as women get older and less visually beautiful, they will naturally go for men who are not as good looking than the types of males they hunted down in their younger and more eye catching days.  But logic only runs true within the male spectrum of mate selection onto the opposite sex.

Essentially, men do not change.  A 25 year old man would want to be with the most physically attractive woman he could see within his periphery.  The law of average would make that woman around 21.  A 50 year old man, if no barriers were to be put in front of him, would still choose that same 21 year old woman.

Now flip the analysis to a cute or hot 22 to 25 year old woman.  In the main, this woman will still find the best looking man the most sexually arousing, but she would be most receptive and advancing towards a lesser looking man.  He wouldn’t be ugly, but he would be that typical 10% to 15% less physically alluring than her.      

Where it becomes trickier is with older women.  Make no mistake, most of them will still prefer a man below their own looks grade, but a higher percentage than their younger and hotter selves would be up for a short term blast or longer term aspiration with a better looking man.  I’ve seen it with my own two eyes - women who are now into their 30s or 40s trying it on with guys in their 20s.  I’ll place a few quid on these being women who made “safer” choices many years ago with men who provided them with a wedding and kids.

And this all goes back to my point at the top:
“Women take more emotional risks as they get older.”

Ultimately, as women get older their prides become less delicate, their egos gradually disintegrate, their insecurities are managed to a point, they aren’t so conscious and obsessed about what other people think of them, and they are prepared to face the cold feeling of emotional rejection that their younger peers cannot bear the sheer thought of.  In essence, the small chance of reward – for a younger man to commit or intimate with her – outweighs the likely risk that she will be turned down.  If only she thought this way when her betting odds and options were of greater margin.

Saturday 25 October 2014

Male hairstyle: the attraction onto women

“Complacency is the enemy of success.”

On this blog I have covered male projected attraction onto women in many forms.  As previously explained, I always believe the fundamental analysis should be made from what is seen in a physical manner.  In time constrained moments, this is all women have to go on in assessing their desirability magnitude.  But then the non-visual aspects of a man take over, many of them – status, attitude, confidence and wealth - far over and above the power of how pleasing to the eye he may be.  At least this is the case for women above the age of 23, in most circumstances.

With a man’s projected attraction onto women, it is far simpler.  He primarily judges a woman on how she looks, and only over time will he make a consideration and assessment to her potential as a long term girlfriend.  Of course, not many men have this luxury, as not many men have the appeal to turn down women at will.  A woman’s personality, values and morals will be secondary to her physical attractiveness, and anything extra to these metrics is a pure bonus.  How many average looking women with high status professions do you see with the highest quality men?  How many men, if given the choice, turn down a hot looking woman who works in a supermarket over a plain looking female counterpart with bags of career potential or future family inheritance?  The truthful answer is: hardly any men.  Flip the question to the gender inverse situation, and the truthful answer will be: most women.

In terms of male physical attractiveness and how women look upon men positively or negatively, this blog has focused on facial impressiveness, body profile and height.  Dress style has also been considered in the overall manner to how it can be used to an advantage or detriment.  This post will acknowledge how far a man’s hairstyle can take him in appealing to the millions of female onlookers.  As a guy who has braved over a dozen styles in his young life – all the way from a shaven cut to a David Beckham pony-tale trend from 2003 - I’d like to think I can give an unbiased view to how the corrective hair illustration can leave women wanting more, and all the way to getting it equally horribly wrong. 

Women love male hair, probably because there are so many more styles men can display in relation to the female equivalent.  Sure, women can do all sorts with colours, but you only need to look at how a love struck girl strokes her fingertips through her boyfriend’s hair to know how it can almost hypnotize her consciousness.  Now there are too many intricate male hairstyles to cover in one post, but the simple analysis of shaven, short or long will give a valid insight to the way to go.


Whether it be the messy, Mohawk or basic Tin-Tin look, the “short back and sides” request will always be the most frequently seen style with men prior to commencement of going thin on top.  This style is the go-to option if you want to appeal to the mass market of women.  There is very little to go wrong by having enough hair to tempt women into thoughts of a ruffle, but not too much to leave forgettable recollections in her thinking he is due a good cut.  Irrespective of whether mine has been a centimeter or couple of inches in length, graded or not at the back, the traditional short style has always left a signature in female thoughts.  I’ll always remember the tears in some women’s eyes when they were aware I would be losing my locks once the chemotherapy treatment commenced, and some men even looked upset when I told them the same news. 

For ugly, average and above average looking men, my advice would always be to go with the short look of some kind.  Because hardly any women will be intimidated by your facial grade, an appealing hairstyle will not have any adverse effect.  If styled well, it can add a 0.5 grade on your overall physical attractiveness.

Good looking men will have less benefit from these glamour styles, but the haircut per se will rarely be the reason for being rejected by women.  Unlike great facial looks or a top 1% male body, very few women will condemn a man on an impressive short hairstyle that further elevates his physical appeal.


When considering a longer haircut, needless to say the length in its entirety can make or break the emotions of women looking on.  When I look back at my phase of longer hair (long enough to do the Beckham double pony-tail), it wasn’t a wise choice.  I’m still glad I experienced it for a few months, because it allows me to compare it against other styles.  But I can only remember one woman who preferred it over the shorter look.  If I told you she had a heavy metal music orientated husband, it paints the picture to the type of woman she was.  For the record, she was fat, pale and ugly.

Now some men can pull it off, almost to the point where you are underwhelmed when you see their new shorter look.  Taller men appear to carry it best, and in my opinion blonde men look decent with longer strands.  Outside of those parameters, there won’t be many a man, in percentage terms, who has women more drawn towards him with long hair than short. 

Tall, good looking men are best suited to have longer hair, but as stated, very few men will have more benefit with women against the comparative shorter cut.  Even if it is actually less impressive to his overall physical attractiveness scale, it would be unwise to think this will make a man more attainable and be rejected on fewer occasions because of women’s insecurity and egoism issues.  They will only further believe the good looking man sporting long hair is more into his mirror reflection than their immediate perception.  Once a woman believes this of a regular guy (high status or famous men can easily get away with it), the consequence is that of game over.

All other men – ugly, fat, average looking and above average looking – cannot gain any benefit from a longer cut in relation to what a shorter style can reap.  Don’t comprehend it, unless it is genuinely for your own trial and error in flirting with life.  Like a “beefcake” body, a long hairstyle will only magnetize a minor percentage of women.


The frowned upon stigma of a shaven style, that was once the belonging of previous generations, is long gone today.  The last 15 years has brought about many men opting for the get out of bed and do nothing haircut.  But is it advantageous?

First, the men who should always opt for a grade 0 or 1 all over are men who are noticeably going thin on top.  There is no way to disguise this, and growing it out or trying to gel and style will only make you look even more foolish.  Bite the bullet, and shave it off.  Women’s eyes will project in a far more admirable process when you get the razors on it.  For men still blessed with a full head of hair, the directive of a full on top shave is a more considerable one.

It’s ironic, because for years I thought about shaving my head but always went with the consensus that you may as well style your hair whilst you still have it.  But some men really do look good with it, and you even wonder if their success with women would move south if they grew their hair.  With me, I had no option, because after half a dozen chemo dosages I was the equivalent of a man going thin in the natural course.

Did it benefit me?  Well, the first thing to say is when I first had it shaved I was also frail, pale (in relativity to my natural olive skin) and tired looking.  I have no shame to say it made me look years older.  However, as it slowly started to grow to a level where it looked more like a decision making shaved head (hence not a high forehead) it was apparent how many women seemed to take an eye onto me.  I recall going on a weekend trip to Stuttgart in Germany less than 3 weeks after my final treatment, and I even surprised myself when numerous women were looking on in intrigue or liking.  I felt like asking them if my mate had asked them to do it (something I knew he couldn’t do due to his lack of German linguistic skills).  A week later, I met my current girlfriend.  Even if I do say so myself, she was the hottest girl in the club.  We’ve often joked about the fact I caught her eye when I pretty much looked the worst I had ever done, but she still diverts from this subject.  I have this niggling feeling that my look back then gave me a more attainable passage to a woman’s mind.  That said, I have never shaved it since.

And maybe this has some bearing on the fortunes of other men from the high end of physical attractiveness.  A short, styled haircut may not hinder him, but in certain cases a shaved head could help him.  He may not attain as many glances from women when he possesses a shaved cut over a short but styled look, but the attainability mentality – hence not looking quite as physically attractive – may open more doors for long term relationships.  It all depends on the main motivation.  If securing a woman for the longer haul is the main objective, I believe a shaved cut may bring about some positive surprises.  If you’re like me, and you refuse to make decisions on the basis of easing female insecurities and egos, I would always go with a short and styled trim.

With the less blessed looking men, the times when a shaved option will benefit you are not going to outweigh the rewards of a shorter style.  Like long hair, there is only a small percentage of women who genuinely prefer a man with a shaved head.  It could be due to their whole inclination psychology of the bad boy lure, or it may more likely be because they are women who like the entire spotlight on them.  A man with a shaven head will almost always receive less attention than a man of similar height, build and looks, but with a contemporary ruffle to the hair.  But like women who are often seen with beefcake bulked men, would you really hold desires to be with one of them?

Also, look out for women who verbally state they prefer men with no hair on top.  A minority of them may be genuinely telling the truth, but I can guarantee you a far greater proportion of these ego-maniac females are saying these words because they can no longer attract decent looking men with hair.  Similarly, they are frequently women who can only live a day in a life knowing they are the main event when walking down the street together.  It will be no surprise that most of these women – who now blabber out the fact they like bald men – were always seen with men who had a full head of hair when they (the women) were younger.

So if you go by the law of averages, women will generally prefer a short and styled male haircut.  Long hair will work with men of certain profiles in the periphery of a minority of women, but the occasions are low.  The same applies for a shaved head, with a slight incremental leverage to the comparative figures when comparing to men with distinctive long hair.

As a side-note:
Is it me, and it may be me being biased due to having very dark hair, but do blonde haired couples often look odd together?  The lack of colour contrast dynamic often enforces me to look at those couples with less glee.  Even a blonde haired man and a female brunette project a better view.  But I always think that a darker haired male meets lighter haired female combination feeds off in the greatest positivity.  Naturally, I accept the sheer masses of blonde haired people in countries like Sweden and Denmark will dictate a high supply in couples of such kind, but even then I couldn’t think of anything better than a good African man taking a romantic stroll with the innumerable eye-catching Scandinavian beauties.  A friend of mine once said how well they receive darker skinned men who stand out from the crowd.  I can also back this theory up during winter sunshine holidays in the Canary Islands.  I think visits to Stockholm and Copenhagen will be on my radar very soon.


Tuesday 21 October 2014

The differing emotions of women pre and post 25

“Was she the one that got away, or a lucky escape?”

It’s a common topic that pops up in the male chat room with regards to the pros and cons of dating younger or older women.  This blog has covered both areas in further detail, but this particular post will focus on how men should expect to encounter challenges from both sides of the female 25th birthday celebrations.  Regular readers of this blog will know why I use the 25th birthday as a defining tipping point, as this milestone is most representative to women consequently hurrying in urges to settle down and find the man they are willing to commit a future with.

As a guy who has dated women aged between 18 and 32 over the last 5 years alone (don’t assume the older women have necessarily been in the more recent of this 5 year duration), I’m in a pretty good position to assess how women appear to act in emotive terms dependent on their age.  Nothing is ever simple and straight forward.  I have a close friend who is more than 5 years younger than me, yet his female partner is 17 years older than my girlfriend.  How does that work?  

The general rule of thumb is pretty straight forward:  the younger the woman, the bigger the ego.  Why is this the case?  The simple explanation is that the vast majority of women do not become more physically attractive post 23, and a reasonable percentage will even see their best days as young as 19.  Women, on a broad scale, should visually look their best between 23 and 25 if they have refrained from smoking and an array of nights out.  A fair number will maintain their beauty, with negligible diminishes, until the late 20s, and a tiny percentage may possibly hold onto their pinnacle look during the early 30s.  Once 35 strikes, you will expect to see an accelerated decline if it hasn’t already commenced. 

So generally speaking, the younger the woman, the hotter she is.  The hotter she is, the more male attention and options will arrive at her disposal.  The more choices she has, the greater chance of her attaining a high self-opinion.

When a woman is faced with the highest number of options – at a younger age due to the likely enhanced physical appearance – a man can anticipate a level of high maintenance in her demands that will not be seen in her later years.  This is, without knowledge of female sexual decline that will inevitably occur in the not too distant future, very draining for men with women at this age.  Naïve men are most inclined to bend over backwards to please her, as they only analyze the present and don’t consider a woman’s limitations as time goes on.  Further to this, the easy option for men to take is to reward women when they look their best, as the assumption is the nicer he is the more she will appreciate him.  But women with options need challenge far more than time, money or compliments, and in fact women at a younger age should actually be treated with less, rather than more, respect in comparison to their older female counterparts.  When women pass 25, and they start to doubt the mirror reflection, sycophancy, in moderation, should be considered as a tangible reward.

Nevertheless, despite very few women looking more pleasing to the eye post 25, I bet it hasn’t escaped some men’s attention of odd experiences with high demanding women in their mid to late 20s.  It may even be the case that some of these women are post 30.  This is all despite being past their physical beauty peak.  The biggest ego I have ever experienced with a girlfriend was with one who was approaching her 28th birthday, and this was in comparison to me not long before splitting up with a hotter girl who was 8 years younger than her.  It can leave a man scratching his head to how the female mind could let it believe she is worth more at a later age, but once you scrape the surface there are answers to be found.

No person can objectively hide from the reality of what they see in the mirror.  When you look in it at least twice a day, it wouldn’t take eagle eyes to notice a couple of blemishes not seen before.  In general, this process will happen earlier for women than men, and it will decline at a faster rate.  However, although full comprehension can be accepted from the inside, false hope of the beauty never ending can rule over the facts, and this manifests to force many women post 25 to go the extra yard to convince men of this fallacy.  Nothing can be more dangerous than a woman clinging onto the last grasp, as she will place high hoops for him to jump over.  It’s a test that most men fail, and the woman can believe that if her man continues with all his efforts then she must be worth it.  She just doesn’t respect him for it.

Women will naturally date more jerks at a younger age, and then go onto a nice guy as they reach mid 20s range.  Some of these women will never have dated a nice guy up until this age, but this will be due to the lure of bad boys rather than the protestations of misfortune.  Never forget there are far more nice guys (at least 6 to 1) than jerks in the world.  So when a woman does date a nice guy, who is over caring, over sycophant and over spending by definition, her ego will be boosted even if her butterflies are in none existence.  Most scenarios of this kind will result in her departing from the boring nice guy, but some relationships of this kind will last in content mode absent of excitement.  Either way, whether it is with him or onto the next poor sucker, her mind will allow a belief that all men should treat her this way.  She fails to confess that a massaged ego is adverse to a true happiness. 

The main reason to women post 25 growing in self-opinion, in my view, is that most of them will now be in some kind of male dominated working environment.  If at least 80% of men are the perennial average looking nice guys who are lacking in female activity and options, the male default is to give any half decent looking woman as much time, effort and attention in hope she will find him appealing.  The office workplace only further epitomizes this habit, as he who lacks in sexual attractiveness strives to bridge the gap in being a good provider.  If you haven’t got raw male power or good looks, a man will burst his guts to improve his income and status.  Surely this will make her use like him, right?  So although she is no longer wanted by edgier men who were more accustomed to her younger years, she is now surrounded by unwanted men in higher numbers.  Once more, despite no visceral desires for these men, they don’t half stroke that good feeling to rock her world and fill up her social media pages.

So in summary, women should have bigger egos when they are younger and become friendlier as they get older, and this, by and large, is the case.  Hotness brings about options, and youth equals hotness.  Where the cross-over becomes more complex is when a woman is very cute or hot, as she is wary of the physical decline simultaneous to not accepting it is happening.  As long as there are men she doesn’t want who feed the mouth of self-importance, she can continue as if nothing has ever changed.

  • Never pay a price for a product above what it shows on the label. 
  • Pay a lower price that allows for depreciation and a decrease of your appreciation as time goes by.
  • If the product is at the highest market value, and it is in high demand, acknowledge that there will be a supply of similar or slightly different commodities on another given day. 
  • If there’s a bidder you are up against, and it goes to an auction, show no hesitation in walking away.  It may feel like you have lost the battle, but you will win the war.  When you see his weary face a couple of years down the line, strapped of cash, energy and optimism, take a moment to look at the product alongside him.  It will be the “prize” he chose to out-bid you for.  Is it still worth the high price he paid back then?  
  • A year later and you see the same product on the shelf and available to buy.  It is at a discounted asking price in comparison to 3 years ago, and a price much lower than the expenditure you were willing to release back then.  As a wiser and richer person of today, you dismiss and walk past the window in knowledge you are willing to pay a higher price for something of far greater value.
  • When you see a product you like, once more you make a bid lower than what it says on the tin.  The shopkeeper can simply take it or leave it.  

Saturday 18 October 2014

“Have you got a boyfriend?”

"By three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is bitterest." (Confucius)

They often say the most fruitful and profitable inventions are from from the most simple ideas.  Sometimes we can over analyze the certain angles, diversions and curve balls that will be thrown our way in life, only for the ball to never even land in our court in the first place.  Basically, we can think about things that never even materialize.  For those of you who work in the commercial world, and for those who attend apparent irrelevant and resource wasting courses (although I bet the lunches are mighty fine), you may be familiar with the 80/20 rule that is often blurred out by these consultants.  That is, you should spend 80% of your time and endeavours on the most valuable 20% of final output.  In similar construction, you should spend the remaining 20% of your efforts, if time allows, on the 80% that leaves no significant mark on the end product.

This blog will not cover many aspects of actual approach tactics to women per se.  This is mainly because there are various internet sites, books and courses on offering from PUAs who are far more qualified to offer the appropriate advice.  In addition to this, I believe much of interaction strategy (game) is common sense in theoretical terms, although I do concede that effective delivery in the practical field is not so simple.  Further to this, a man could learn all the lines under the sun when it comes to walking up to a woman he doesn’t know, but unless he holds the right attitude and attains the corrective knowledge to why the female mind functions in the way it does, he may as well be an exquisite lip serviced robot that perfects the art of talking to women without knowing how it got there in the first place. 

And as a final self-proclaimed come misconstrued arrogant justification, being in the privileged top 1% in male physical attractiveness makes certain approach methodology unproductive.  I would, by my calculations, need to walk past 99 women aged between 15 to 40 in the UK before finding someone of equal or greater physical attractiveness than me in relative gender terms.  Sounds cocky, I know, but I try to keep things real for the sake of validity.  Future posts and close friends will confirm my humility and modesty.  So from my experience, the perennial “neg” (a comment that neither compliments nor insults a woman), in addition to “DHVs” (men demonstrating higher value) should always be geared towards a man who is in the spotlight with women who are frequently more eye catching than his own looks grade.  Good looking men, with height and bodies to compliment, need to spend more of their time displaying vulnerability and attainability signs with the vast majority of the female population.

Nevertheless, there does come a time when a certain phrase, something so short and sweet, brings about the ideal results of maximum reward for minimum exertion.  The early question of “have you got a boyfriend” is priceless in its overall consideration.  I’ll give you 5 reasons:

  • It is a direct question that doesn’t skate around the surface of any subsidiary topics.  Women know that men who engage with them usually want something at the end of the conversation beyond a “nice talking to you” cop-out, and this assertiveness shows her that this man doesn’t take any prisoners in his path towards attaining what he such desires.  Women are attracted to confident and assured men who know what they want, and in addition to this they admire men who take things in their stride by not fearing negative outcomes.  A man who shows self-pity in his body language when being rejected may stroke a woman’s ego at first – as whilst women do not take pleasure in rejecting men, they take stronger pleasure out of the good feeling of his projected attraction onto her – but they do not respect men who slump away in a sea of doubt.  A man leading with the “take it or leave it” direction is the one who leaves a much fonder memory.
  • This question allows a man to save time wondering or pondering how to eventually get to the words he truly wants to say.  He could waste minutes, maybe hours, before finally hearing her refusal words in reference of his advances.  Time is too precious to waste on a woman you don’t even know.  Although some men find it hard to take no for an answer, I’ve never been a huge fan of attached women generally.  A brick through my window some years ago left a sour taste in my mind for situations of love triangles, and it gave me enough feedback to not invest in a committed woman unless the reward far outweighed the possible risk – hence she was unbelievably physically attractive and mentally stimulating, with little chance of her boyfriend or his friends tracking me down.  It’s important to remember that men and women are from opposing universes when it boils down to being involved with attached members of the opposite sex.  All things equal, men would almost always take the single woman.  Women, deny it as they may, would more often choose the taken man.
  • It is a genuine question.  Whilst some women enjoy a “neg”, or god forbid, a cheesy complimentary chat up line, many more can construe these openings as insulting or unchallenging/too attainable respectively.  With this “have you got a boyfriend” line, it falls on neither extreme.  Call it a risk free opener if you will.
  • If she does in fact say she has a boyfriend then it allows a man to illustrate his pre-selection validation by mentioning his girlfriend.  Ask the target girl what she thinks the pros and cons, not including sex, are with regards to being in a relationship.  By speaking the words of eliminating sex, this shows her you are confident and relaxed to talk about sexual matters and relationships – which are subjects that women love to talk about more than anything.  If she says she hasn’t got a boyfriend, simply state the fact you admire women who don’t need reassurance in having continuous boyfriends and that it’s worth waiting for someone of quality rather than a case of content.  She will most likely believe this is the way you view the world (as it should be how any man views it), and it will come across as you being a person who validates women rather than the inverse.
  • Even if she has a boyfriend, her reactions to the question and responses from her answers, in addition to her emotion (or lack of) towards him, will enable a man to evaluate whether it is worth pursuing.  That choice remains with his good self.  Also, a good response to her likely phrase of “I have, sorry” is to bounce it back with “why are you sorry?”  Her inevitable answer will be more words about having a boyfriend.  At that point the final response should be, “I should be sorry, because it will be your loss.”

Five simple words can save a lot of time, energy and contemplation, whilst most likely scoring huge advantages.  I refer to it as an early question because rarely will it be profitable as an opening question.  Unless you are blessed with fame or extreme local social status, women need a little time, no matter how physically attracted or sexually aroused they are towards you, to assess getting to know the man a little better.  But there’s little advantage in talking for 20 minutes to a woman only for her to turn round with some kind of excuse, so for me it should be thrown in within 5 minutes of approach.  Life’s too short to waste time.  And if you belong to the numbers mentality group – a man who almost thrives on rejection in the knowledge of the more he asks, the greater his success with women – where’s the harm in directly opening with the question if you’re oppositely passing a cute girl on a bar staircase?  Nothing lost. 

Women will allow a man to spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, months or even years in allowing her to feel better about life.  This can be in the form of innumerable questions, supplication, compliments, buying of drinks, lavish gifts, provisioning exertion, and him prioritizing her life, not his own.  All these acts of a blue pill man will elevate a woman’s ego to levels beyond her objective value, and a naïve man can, and does, naively think this giving path eventually wears her down in declaration of love.  But all this achieves is illustration of a man who needs to do these things to seek her approval.  For every time he makes a move of this kind, the female brain mechanism allows itself to think he can do no better than her.  Once there is a glimmer of this feeling, she will gradually grind down to a point in every lost ounce of admiration, love and respect towards him.

As I will often refer to, it is prudent for a man to place himself in “win:win” situations of this kind.  The sentence in is content entirety is not as important as the attitude it should create when approaching.  This question should rub off on a man’s attitude to not place her value levels above his own.  Even if she is more visually striking, this doesn’t make her any the better a human being.  And the presence a man portrays will leave a far more efficient mark on a woman’s mind than any said words.  Women (and many there are) who have been infatuated by illiterate but intriguing men were not taken back by his verbal acumen.  They were put under an emotional spell by his brashness and care-free behavior.  Seduction is a refined craft rather than a defined art.

Of course a happy ending isn’t guaranteed.  Many women, with the natural self-centred and attention requirements that go before them, will lead men on if it is to their benefit.  Sometimes they will even be unsure one way or the other when interacting with the man.  For example, she could accept a good looking man’s proposal, only to later hide in the trenches due to her delayed brain function informing of his excessive greater value, higher physical impressiveness or likely infidelity.  With an uglier man, relative to the female candidate, she may have enjoyed the pampering he gave her in front of a group of friends, but she later feels there isn’t that true connection to take things further. 

But when all is said and done, it really is an effective early line for positive outcomes.  It might be too direct for some, but it suits my persona of today because, for different reasons, I can’t afford to spend valuable time on aspects that have no tangible or intangible rewards to my welfare.  I have enough people to talk to, so if I’m interfaced with a woman I like on a visceral basis I want to know if she feels the same way or not very early on.  With this deliverable, at the very least other women will see a man engaging with her.  And, contrary to female protestations and male misinterpretations, nearly every woman is always more attracted to a man who is in the company of another sister competitor.

As a last note to wrap this up, make a mental note of the actual words in the question – “have you got a boyfriend?”  A mistake to make, although unlikely to be detrimental in the whole scheme of things, is to word the question as “do you have a boyfriend?”  Whilst “got” may not be the most pleasant created word within the English dictionary, in the dynamics of female sexual perception it is more edgy than asking by the use of “have”.  The question I recommend has an air of not giving a crap either way.  Phrasing it in the other system gives off a slight message of trepidation to the answer.  Saving pennies can create pounds in the perceptive mind of a woman.

Wednesday 8 October 2014

A Woman's life summed up in 3 pictures

"This is what you get when you poke a stick in a hornet's nest."

This post wasn't planned, but I couldn't resist a few words on how you can pretty much see the magical world of a woman's life in terms of egoism, self-entitlement, self-pity, opportunism, mate choice and physical decline.  I love metaphors, phrases, real-life happenings and success or failure stories, but no amount of words can ever quite come close to revealing the truth behind emotions, predicaments and fake dressing of content or unhappiness that coincide in our lives than the images produced from a camera lens.

What struck out at me from a distance was the heading to this article:
This Woman Was "Too Pretty" To Find Love On Dating Websites

Straight away, this theory is a complete crop of shite.  No woman can be "too pretty" on a dating website.  I have done my own self-analysis of this dating method, and let me tell you there are more better looking men trying to find someone from the opposite sex - whether it be for love or sex - than the numbers of physically attractive women.  This goes against the normal course of events in society where there are nearly 4 times as many cute women and hot women in comparison to above average looking men and very good looking men respectively.  In addition to this, even if male good looks are not a priority for a woman (and they rarely are a priority), there will always be the hoards of lesser looking men who can offer more in the way of provision, reliability and commitment.  So sure, love may be hard for a woman to find if she lays down the usual long tick list, but capturing it is no more difficult online than on the street per se.

In addition to this, I very much doubt that vast quantities of men are writing messages to women in proposing to only "hook up".  Just take a look at the mediocre, to be kind, calibre of >90% of men on dating websites.  Sure, they would give their right arm to just find a woman for sex and then move onto the next one, but very few men in percentage terms have this armoury to attain such luxury.  This woman in the story claimed men only wanted her for sex (which, an interpretation for any woman stating this is self-promotion of - "how beautiful I am"), but "Mr Average" is hardly going to lead with this, is he?

I've linked the whole article below, but here are 3 of the pictures with a few summaries added from yours truly.

I'm predicting she was in her early to mid 20s when this professional photo was taken.  Yes, decent from what I can see, although any professional portrait will enhance the true real-life look.  All in all, ignoring the chavvy tattoo on her left wrist, I'd give her a 7.5/10 from what can be seen.

Now she is somewhere between 28 and 33 (on the basis the article states the two of them bumped into each other 5 years ago).  I hedge a bet she was 29 or 30 on the big event.  Women who want a wedding day to show off don't need to wait long for a clueless man to take her down that route, and her husband looks as beta as they come.  Even on the biggest day of her life (cough, cough), she struggles to scrape above 6.75/10.
"The pair dated for a few months when she was 19 but they split because he was too quiet whereas she was too outgoing."
Once more, let's have a free interpretation to what this means:  Basically, she wanted to explore all avenues with, let's just say, edgier guys out there, whilst he was a geeky nice guy who was way too boring for her.

As the article states she is now 33, I can only assume the above picture is a very recent one.  6.25/10 at best?  The couple have a young boy too.  
Q-Tip 1:
Notice how the son is nowhere to be seen.  You will often find that women show more affection towards their daughter than the respective son.  Although a man may have far more in common with his son, he will be equally as proud to be seen with his daughter.

If this process of events cannot smack a naive man in the face, then nothing will.  I'll clarify once more in chronological order:
  • At 19 - prime beauty for many women, but more importantly the peak of their social options - her now husband was not her type.  She dated men of differing characters (hence jerks) to him.  
  • From her early to mid 20s, she will range between pinnacle physical beauty within her life span to slow decline.
  • During the late 20s, a woman has internally accepted that men from her past are no longer as interested as years gone by.  To counter-act this nagging thought, a woman will look for new accomplishments to show her value to the world in the form of a wedding ring and children.  Naturally, only certain men, although it is still most men, will take on this responsibility over the knowledge of lost freedom.
  • At 33, even the nice guy beta male she marries is not much less physically attractive than her.  If you graded him at 6/10 in physical looks level, and you used the 10% to 15% leverage to how men can upgrade (assuming he has a decent job and reasonable level of personality), he should be in the arms of a lower end cute woman.  Basically, he could do better.

Q-tip 2:
Never give more to life than you need to.  Life will never give back more to you than what you put in.  Nothing epitomizes this more than the sexual market for men.  One day, if you exerted so much money, time, energy and gratitude towards a woman in the past, you will look at it all today in thinking where it ever got you.

****All the above statements made by the author are opinions based on generalizations of females in similar stature and findings to the woman named in the article.  This blog does not subscribe to claiming this actual woman delivers life moves as stated.****

Acknowledgements and further reading



Tuesday 7 October 2014

Women’s interpretation of men lacking ambition

“It’s not the end, not even the beginning of the end, 
but more perhaps the end of the beginning.”

First: a basic truth behind women’s choices in men.  A woman’s ideal male partner is someone who is higher in occupational status but lower in physical beauty than her.  It may sound obvious to season campaigners who study this subject, but I think this basic principle is lost on most people.  Men, naïve as many are, can be naïve or oblivious to this all so common occurrence.  Women, who are far more aware and astute to this fact, conceal their words to protect their integrity.

Of course this trend only starts to emerge from a certain point in life.  On the whole, this will creep in when women hit their 24th birthday, and if it hasn’t by then it will certainly have done so when 25 or 26 candles are on the cake.  At this point, women are both looking to settle down and starting to doubt their beauty in comparison to the pictures from their late teens and early 20s.  Naturally, a man who isn’t striking to the eye but who is bringing in the cash manifests as a man who ticks each box for most women’s life path.

Many of these men – who are less physically attractive but with decent occupations – do not inspire women in sexual terms.  Sure, they have a penis and may know a thing or two in the bedroom, but they are never going to be the kinds of men who leave her craving to rip his clothes off.  The odd exception may be if the respective woman works at the same place as the higher status man, because his display of power in the workplace can, to a restricted point, psychologically arouse her more despite him lacking in physical stature.  An ideal man for a woman is someone who has a level of raw male power and height, but who possesses facial features that are undoubtedly less impressive than her own.  If this man is higher status than her, the dream ticket has been found.  A man who is as, or more, physically attractive than the relevant woman is rarely desirable to her for long term relationship consideration, but if he does show leveraged status above all other men, it is not coincidental how this same woman will take oversight to her irritable feeling of physical inferiority. 

When a woman does finally track down the man she is willing to commit to, and this man will usually be the low in demand but high in commitment willingness male, she sure holds desires for him to play his part of the bargain.  This comes in the form of earning as much money, taking on as many promotions as possible and working as many hours as his frail body allows, in order to give her and the family as good a life as she believes they all deserve.  In previous generations, this “deserved” life was little more than food on the table, one family car and possibly a short summer vacation.  For the modern day woman, with techno freak children at a counter, the requirements have been elevated to a candy bag mixture of an affluent living area, a big house, two cars, a socially accepted school with a reputation suffice for the son and daughter, wide screen plasma televisions, laptops, tablets, mobile phones, sunshine destinations, and enough clothes for the wife and children to look good against the competition of next door.  Have I missed anything?

Now the above is a touch extreme.  Strong men say “no”, and in truth very few women in percentage terms have the quality – hence extreme physical beauty that is sustainable – to demand all of this.  But my point is that the bar appears to be raised as every year passes by, and the poor man in this dynamic usually bears the brunt of accusation in falling short of the mark.  He needs to do a little bit more to pay for the inflationary requirements of next year.  The woman is asking him to show more ambition…

When a woman sits down with her male partner during the evening meal, the subject of money will never be far from the first topic of conversation.  I may not have a nagging wife myself (aren’t I the lucky one!), but I hear it from many visits to friend's houses.  A woman is quite cunning when she will state the word “ambition” to a man.  She will claim it is all about him fulfilling his potential, gaining greater job satisfaction, acquiring a new lease of life and being able to show the world he has made it.  There is no mention to the disadvantages it may have on his health, stress levels, free time or work-life balance impact.  However, a woman’s true motivations behind her man showing more ambition are to earn more cash and portray an elevated status for her to show off during the next social drinks outing. 

Q-tip 1:
Behind most women’s words, when men are discussed, is a translation that they desire an ideal male partner to have money and status.  This won’t be said in words per se, but look out for the giveaway signs that bring it all back.  An obvious flaw women make is by mentioning what her female friend’s male partner earns or where they live.  It is another way of saying her man should be trying harder to get her to the same standing start.

Q-tip 2:
Men can, do and will take their jobs more seriously, often to the point of seeking further professional ambition, when they are in genuine love with a woman.  This “seriousness” is further compounded if he is in love with a hot woman (especially a woman hotter than his usual familiarity and history).  When this is the circumstance, a man can channel more ambitious thoughts through that little brain of his because the love acts as a vision for a future life with the woman he has found.  When single, men, like women, can get frustrated with the predicaments of life, and they deliver in a more care-free attitude in the workplace. 

Ambition is healthy for a man to have.  It gives him a purpose in life and a reason to wake up in the morning.  Where the meaning of ambition differs for men is that they see it as an array of elements that form one.  Ambition can be measured as accomplishments in life away from work, true happiness, quality of life, long term health, embraced memories, prideful recollections, tear in the eye moments, time to take a breath, and weekends to look forward to.  All the mentioned are no closer to being achieved by taking on stressful career ladder propositions and working 60 or 70 hours a week once there. 

On the other hand, a woman’s inclination for male ambition is pretty much the opposite.  It is for him to take on long hours at work with sleepless nights as a consequence, and it is to pay for items in life that run positives on her first and foremost.  At what point does she stop to consider how the perceived ambition could actually drain him dry from any enjoyment in life?

I wouldn’t say I’m an ambitious person in occupational terms.  I was once very much hungry in ambition when graduating from University, but various companies, and the tribulations male colleagues have put themselves through to reach goals, have enforced me to look at the bigger picture.  In addition to this, I’ve seen numerous men, and I’ve been bitten on this once or twice myself, who have gone way beyond the call of duty in hope of a better day, only to fall flat on their faces due to false promises. 

Further to this, I have experienced the little matter of a life threatening disease.  If cancer, or a similar illness or tragedy in life, cannot make a person see the bigger picture of what life offers, then nothing ever will. 

What I am ambitious in is reaching goals.  I strive to look good, I like to feel healthy, I endeavour to dress well and I indulge in odd luxuries if the wallet can stretch.  My objective is to experience as many women as feasibility allows from all countries, ethnicity and personas.  I am ambitious to see as much of the world as possible, but this is simultaneous to still knowing my responsibilities to get there.  If I worked longer, even as little as a couple of extra hours in each day, it would restrict me from achieving much of what I set out to do.  One of these restrictions would be not having time to study daily worldwide business in subsequently making money on the stock markets.  Ladies, is this your interpretation of lacking ambition?

I feel for men who are driven down this route.  Tired, worried, exerted and energy stricken men are an all too common viewing in the modern day world.  The majority of them are seen this way because they are trying to please the woman they are with more than the consideration to their own well-being and repercussions. 

But to summarize, did these men have to try so hard?  If they rewind time, even by just a few years, can the same woman they are with today demand what she stipulated back then?  In other words, who else would give in to her demands now?  Not to put too fine a point on it, she isn’t as hot as she used to be.  As mentioned before, the longer a relationship goes on, the stronger a man should be with his role in the bond.  If only men could have a crystal ball before they dived in balls deep.  If not, how about colliding into and reading a blog of this genre?  I can guarantee you they’d all be happier for it.     

Saturday 4 October 2014

Women’s hatred towards men looking younger

“We are who we are, and we do what we do. 
No amount of devious plans will halt the irresistible force of human nature.”

If you open your ears once in a while, and you choose to scrutinize the true feelings to vain attempts of good intentions or concealed animosity, you can learn much about how another person truly emotes on a subject in life.  In the case of women’s discussions that I often hear on the topic of men’s habits, it hasn’t escaped my attention how they show such distastes towards men dressing in an inappropriate fashion in respect to their age.

But hold on one moment.  Are women’s words born out of fundamental concern to a man making a fool of himself in obliviousness to those laughing down at him, or could it just so possibly be drawn from ulterior motives, discomforting thoughts or hidden motivations that suit their own welfare?

Before more meat is put on the bones, I throw out 4 headline points:

  • Should men dress the age they are to suit their birth date or the age they look?
  • What are the true reasons to why women take a disliking to men dressing “younger”?
  • Do their emotions differ depending on the man himself?
  • Are there any pronounced exceptions to the norm?

Should men dress the age they are to suit their birth date or the age they look?

There are two schools of thought on this: 
The female argument is that, irrespective to how old or young a man looks in comparison to his chronological age, he should dress in the way he should act.  He should act the age he is, because this shows a man whose mental development has moved in line with the years that have passed by.  Most women want a man to act his age, right?

The male argument (and I’m happy to play the pied piper role on this) is that surely a man who looks 25 but is 30 in age is more equipped to dress in a younger fashion than a 25 year old man who physically looks like he has already celebrated his 30th birthday. 

What are the true reasons to why women take a disliking to men dressing “younger”?

Women will tell you they are only looking out for a man in saving him embarrassment.  He will be unaware to the ridicule from external angles, therefore they having nothing more sinister than his interests at heart.  Some will be saying all this in sincere terms, but far more will have their own agendas at the forefront.  A lot depends on the woman.  I’ve been in relationships with women where I was, and still am today, convinced all their words were made with genuine intent.  But I’ve dated many more women where I was left with conspicuous questions to how honest they were in respect to which plate they were primarily looking after. 

The more accurate cynical stance would be that women feel vulnerable when placed in a predicament where men will be placed in situations to attract abundant women from various quarters.  More on this next.

Do their emotions differ depending on the man himself?

Pure and simply, the answer is: yes. 
If the woman is with a man who is less physically attractive than her by a noticeable margin, she will be more inclined to dress him to look younger than dissuading him from an image to knock years off him.  Women don’t desire to be with a man who shows them up, because at the end of the day women are, even when it comes to their most sensitive metric of physical appeal, still in need of knowing people don’t look at her partner in disgust.  With this in mind, she will aim to reach a safety net that maximizes his look without taking public eyes off her.

This brings it appropriately onto a woman’s mentality when she is with a man who is near or above her level of physical attractiveness grade.  Not many will venture into a relationship with these eye catching men in the first place, but the minority who do will have one eye on his further exploitation.  A handsome man looking even younger only comas the respective female partner into a suffocating impulse that damages her ego, and in these instances she is prone to get him to dress his age, at the very least.      

Are there any pronounced exceptions to the norm?

Not that this is applicable to the regular world, but like every analysis of female projection onto male celebrities, women will not condemn famous men making the same fashion choices as they would do so with men “off the street”.  Think of Jude Law, David Beckham, Enrique Iglesias or Will Smith – all men in their late 30s or early 40s – and they dress in a stylish way that knocks years off their age.  Would you hear women complain about this in the same way they would about being with a man they know personally?  It has already been documented on this blog in other posts, but you will never lose touch with the numbers of women who contradict their words with everyday men in the lost track of justifying the same actions that high status men deliver.

I see all this as an intriguing analysis, because men rely far less in looking younger and stylish to attract the opposite sex than the inverse situation.  However, as a summary, you will never go too far wrong in assuming the following with women who are hostile towards men who dress to impress:
Women age at an earlier age and at a faster rate than men.  This uncontrollable sexual evolution naturally allows many men to be with younger women, and a woman’s mind does not take kindly to this act of life.  To somewhat mitigate this nagging emotion, women will often use manipulating, cunning and bad advice tactics to sway men away from looking younger. 

A reasonable rule of thumb to draw, with nothing else to go on, would be to assume that:   
If a man is with a younger and hotter woman, or a woman with high levels of inner confidence, there is far more likelihood she will have less issue with her male partner looking younger.  If she is older and less physically attractive to his relativity, expect a woman to be far more antagonistic when she sees him place that dapper shirt on for the first time.