“He’s ok to look at”

“The dog never barks when it knows the perpetrator.”

If you have experienced certain women staring in your direction with more than curiosity, on more than a couple of occasions, and with transparent sexual interest, you will not be alone. This frequency of events does not happen to many men in regularity, but it will have been inflicted on most men at least once in their existence.  To naïve and innocent men out there, it would be forgivable to think this is the main attraction cue you need in order to take things further and secure the deal.  Over time, you realize nothing more could be further from this thought mechanism and the truth.

More often than not when an indicator of interest has been sent in your direction, but subsequently followed by rejection, the relevant woman will have a boyfriend.  The question begs then, why did she look at you? 

• It is important to remember that most men don’t exactly possess much more than an average level of physical attractiveness.  With this consideration, the respective girlfriends, fiancés or wives of these men will be going through contented emotions at best, but more likely boredom.  Women eventually choose men who are safe, but they live to regret it in later life.  So when this same woman does see a man in her periphery who is considerably easier on the eye than her male partner, her subconscious reaction and impulse causes eyes to stray in his direction.
• Even if a woman’s boyfriend is a decent looking – hence above average looking – man, the same cycle of events will be enforced upon her as explained above when she collides with a very good looking man.  As much as men and women differ entirely in their psycho-emotional make-up, and the consequent choices that go with it, they are very much the same in terms of uncontrollable and instinctive responses to alluring features of the opposite sex.  Men look at the hottest women, and women look at the hottest men.
• In the same pattern as above, if a woman’s male partner is pretty much similar grade in facial terms to another man she sees, if the other man attains more impressive body profile and height, she will once more be tempted to glance over.
• Women are obsessed with what the outside public, and especially their closer social network, think of their importance to the world.  This obsession and need to feel valued is primarily and proportionally eased by securing a puppet boyfriend to idolize her life, but this positive feeling wears off over time.  So if a woman can reel over a better looking man to engage with her, it can pathetically make her believe she is still attractive.

Side-note to last point:
This female fragile pride also goes a long way to explain why many women (even hot and very cute women) take a polar opposite approach, in looking the other way and appearing like they have swallowed a wasp when walking past the best looking men.  This will be despite noticing him beforehand and finding him sexually arousing.  The thought of showing interest, and him not showing any or much interest back, is too much for her to gamble in respect to the possible doubts of her self-opinion that his apathy will place in her mind.

Are many of these women likely to adulterate, you may ask?  Well in spite of the consensus that women are of promiscuous nature in today’s society, not many will just drop their knickers for a bit of fresh pork sword.  Because although in marriage terms men and women file for divorce on infidelity grounds in equal percentage measures, far more men, given the chance, would have sex with a hotter (in relativity to his female partner) woman than a woman would have sex with a hotter man.  The reason more men don’t cheat is because they either do not have the appealing attributes to find a hotter woman, or they simply don’t believe they can upgrade.

However, obviously a minority of women do run off to hotel rooms, cheap apartments or side-alleys to feel alive with a man who will turn her on more than the one who awaits her homecoming.  From my experience, and unfortunately as a hot-blooded male who prefers younger and fresher female flesh, a woman in her early to mid-30s (usually married and with kids) is more likely to offer herself than a woman who is in her mid to late 20s (usually unmarried and without kids).  Why is this the case?

• First, most of the younger compartment of women (mid to late 20s) are still awaiting the big wedding day and potential status of motherhood whoring.  Although a high percentage of these women will be with men who, to be kind, leave them uninspired, they are less likely to jeopardize the possibility of it going pear-shaped prior to the attention-seeking events.
• Second, most of the older category of women (early 30s onwards) have achieved the milestone life tick off list of a house, wedding and kids, and the man who provided them with all this is now pretty much spent.  She will risk more when she has less to gain and less to lose.
• Third, and I think this aspect is overlooked, is the fact that the older bracket of women have realized the mistakes that the younger group of women are now making.  It was all good and well placing a safe bet with the provisioning man in her 20s, but now she has, despite being proud of the children she loves as a mother, come to accept that he was never the man who gave her butterflies.  When all is said and done, the relationship was all about her.
• Fourth, women become friendlier, more amiable, and less egocentric the older they become – and at a higher speed once the 30th birthday arrives.  All this manifests to produce a specimen that is far less hostile towards men of greater gender beauty relativity.  They will also lean on their life experience from a voice within telling them these men should have been given a chance when they (the women) were in their 20s and more appealing.  It’s almost as if they are trying to resurrect the poor decision they made 5 or 10 years ago.  

You may have noticed I excluded any information about even younger women – 18 to 23 years of age – in comparison to the elder ladies as mentioned.  In summary, these not so innocent flying chicks in this age bracket tend to fall in the middle.  They don’t have the impending big showcase days to roll the dice with like the mid to late 20s broads, but they naturally haven’t started the head in hands regret process due to their lack of experience.  Many of them also haven’t reached the stage of egoism and trust dilemmas in being with a better looking man, almost to the point where a fair proportion actually place priority on male physical attractiveness.  With this in mind, it is very much an individual based trial and error methodology.  Some will grasp for pastures new, whilst others confide in safety and idolization inclinations with less sought after men.


Non-relationship women

So if most women, and in particular women worth having, are in a relationship, why would it be that single women still reject the men they gave bed eyes to?  Ultimately, it has all been said before on this blog.  Men and women are from completely different planets in this respect.

For a moment, take a pie in the sky scenario.  A man looks at a woman who is more physically attractive than his female better half.  The woman he stared at approaches him in a warm and genuine manner, and she strikes up conversation.  If the man is single, he will take things onto the next level.  If he is attached, he will either cheat or politely decline on a loyalty and faithfulness basis.  Irrespective, the man will be friendly, polite and appreciating.

Now reverse the situation to the usual course of events.  The man approaches the woman who gave him an interest indicator.  The woman, now feeling insecure, uncomfortable, embarrassed and weaker due to her obvious signs, puts up her armoury to avoid coming across as the instigator.  Her counteracting move is to vainly convince her mind that she has no interest, and it is in fact the man who is making all the moves.  

Add on the small matter that, like no blast of magic, many of these men they looked at are on a similar or greater looks level to them (hence why they looked at the men in the first place), and of course the whole egoism ignition is turned on in knowing they couldn’t walk down the streets with a man of parity or surpassed visual grade.  A woman feels a much higher degree of self-importance when she is with a lesser looking guy.  And this isn’t even going into the lack of trust she would have with the better looking man who would holds options of plenty in the sexual market.

Q-tip 1:
The sign of a quality (therefore very rare) woman is a woman who listens more carefully to the sound of her beating heart than the sound of her thumping ego.

Q-tip 2:
When it comes to the very best looking men (outside of fame), who are ultimately the men who women sexually stare at the most, the vast majority of these women do not choose to date this tiny pocket of eye candy male population.  Nevertheless, this tidal wave of repelled emotion is not close to the irritating and despairing thought of him dating one of her female friends or foes.  Simply put, she doesn’t want him, but she sure doesn’t want anyone else to have him.