“Don’t be afraid in being unique, different, or a grain against the norm.
The norm may well be completely wrong.”
There are so many differences between women and men that this isn’t the time to go through them all. This blog has pin-pointed many items that reflect these gender contrasting habits, emotions, predilections, rationalizations - and ultimate decisions on the back of it all - whether directly or indirectly, from the start of posts being published.
When it arrives on the doorstep of partner preference and sexual appetite, nothing comes close to illustrating this difference than how pre-selection attained from the opposite sex impacts on the hunger this has on others from the opposing gender. It’s important to note the distinction between preference and sexual appetite, against conclusive choice. More on this later…
Over recent years there have been a number of cases where certain females (often University aged) would put their virginity up for sale. I was going to reference one of the stories, but quite frankly they are everywhere. Some women were prepared to go on a lie detector to prove their virgin status. I’m not sure what the outcomes were, but needless to say there would have been no shortage of male bidders. Further needless to say, but I’ll do it anyway, the more physically attractive the woman, the more male bids and the higher the price.
One day as I waited for a hair appointment, I picked up a magazine and saw a reader question section at the back. One man wrote in, tongue in cheek in his question I can only hope, picking up on this subject. He mentioned whether it was worth him trying the same thing to earn some cash. I credit the magazine, because it would have just been easy for them to just disregard the reader and place his question in the rubbish bin. Instead, the “Doctor Love” answer was spot on. In humour but valid return, they responded in the way of stating how women despise celibate men, and in fact he may well have decent chance of female interest if he used it as them being the thousandth woman to sleep with him.
Notch modesty creates dry female panties
I always recall one mistake I made on this topic a good few years ago. I was in a relationship with a very facially pretty woman, although her body was little above average. She thought she was hotter than objectively clearly showed. Early on in our dating phase, she sent me a text mentioning that I was a stud, and I know it. At the time I thought it could have been a bit of a dig or a cry for reassurance of my feelings towards her, but I just ignored it.
A few weeks later when we were lying in bed, she brought the topic up again. I’ve slept with far more women than the average man – hopefully because I’m a fairly decent catch, but undoubtable stronger reason due to, unlike most men, I didn’t choose to settle down with the first half-decent woman who put her arm around me. But with hands up naivety on my part back then, I chose to understate the truth in hope that the reward was her easing of trepidation. When I looked at her face, it was the all so familiar face of a fake female smile. In other words, her external view attempted to show glee, simultaneous to internal disappointment and frustration. Her ego felt better, but her sexual urge had slid in those moments.
In a way, I could get away with this humble wrong move much more than an average looking man. When women are faced with good looking men, they do need some level of comfort that he will stick around, and this is most relevant in the early stages of the relationship. Although excessive female pre-selection will always make a woman more sexually into you, and give her heightened urges to date you, many of them will also avoid a man if he comes across as too unattainable for loyal boyfriend material. This is all the more common with women above the age of 23. Also, an average looking man with a high notch count will get more leeway than a very good looking man with the same notch count, all else being equal.
The bigger mistake I made on this occasion was the fact I was already nailing her. Outside of prostitution, once a woman has decided to have sex with a man, it usually means she is in love with him. Even a woman deciding to have a one night stand with a man she finds sexually arousing, with knowledge it won’t last, will frighteningly love this man far more than the man she eventually marries. This is why there is such a small link between love and marriage. Women are in love with men who are hard to pin down and commit. Women can love (but are not in love with), like a best friend, men who will marry them. Cross-overs do exist, but in percentage terms these occurrences are rare.
Men’s ideal female partner sexual history
Now yes, some men do marry women who have collated a fair number of past male sexual partners. But two points to this:
· A high percentage of men who commit to women who have slept with a high number of men (often more men than women he has slept with) are men with low appeal and stricken in options. You will often find men of this kind with female partners who have children from previous endeavours – and, by no mean coincidence, a high number of male sexual partners from the past. Her options are limited due to this past baggage on her behalf, and unwanted men are her only feasible targets.
· All else being equal – essentially, primarily and predominantly this being a woman’s physical looks – a man will prefer to settle down and commit to a woman with fewer past sexual partners than the one with a higher quantity.
This isn’t to say that men want a virgin, as these women, unless spending years on end rehearsing moves for when the real thing happens, are useless, reactive, non-experimental and lacking knowledge in bed. This is why the unofficial rule of thumb for ideal male preference, at least for longer term commitment, is a woman who has slept with 3 to 4 men that consisted of long term (6 months or more) relationships. With further ideology, this woman will be around her mid 20’s when the fourth one was popped. Any fewer, and the likelihood is she borders onto being boring between the sheets. Significantly more, and the question mark always floats above the bed-posts stating possible slut or poor long term (or heaven forbid, marriage) material.
A final thought
I’ve often noticed that both women and men get it awfully wrong in their exploitations of pre-selection when attempting to attract members of the opposite sex they like. Women play the wrong hand as, due to their uncontrollable need to feel wanted, special, and to show the world how popular and valuable they are, they will seek the attention of other men, whether directly (in social environments) or indirectly (social media, texting) and in turn try and get her target man jealous. As men don’t use jealousy productively in being further attracted to a woman, this doesn’t have any positive implication – other than him thrusting inside that bit harder than usual to maybe teach her a lesson. All a woman needs to do is maximize her hotness, emphasize her loyalty, and illustrate her good girlfriend material traits, in keeping her man attracted and interested.
On the other hand, and as explained throughout this post, women are more attracted to men, at least in most cases, when other women show interest. Yet the vast majority of men do not acknowledge or comprehend this female uncontrollable taste, so they act like prince charming in proving she is the only girl in the world and he only has eyes for her. Bad move.