“Stay in your lane, and you won’t get run off the motorway.”
I went for the annual catch up with a few weeks ago. The first place we ventured into is a nice small village pub in an affluent location that is Repton, Derbyshire. As we walked from the outside terrace to the indoor bar area, I noticed a group of women (four of them, with a couple of them being around the 8/10 looks mark, and the other two slightly lower) sitting with a few men of similar age. The young men weren’t bad looking from first impression – around the 7/10 mark. The whole group would have been aged in their late teens/early 20’s. My friend and I stood at the bar for the duration of our stay.
No more than half an hour later, we decided to move on. As I walked past the group who were still conversing away, when I opened the door to depart I heard one of the girls say in a tone and volume that clearly desired to be heard :“He is very good looking!”
Of course, there is no guarantee she was referring to me, but let’s face it in the world of reality it would have been more than a big coincidence had she not been. Maybe they were just talking generally at that particular time, but again, this would have been hugely coincidental.
For the purpose of this post, let’s say she was pointing out me.
Anyone who lives in the real and objective world will know that the ratio of women complimenting and promoting a man’s physical allure is roughly at a 1:50 basis in comparison to men complimenting and promoting a woman’s physical beauty. I’ll explain why:
· A good part of this explanation is because, in consideration to males and females aged 18 to 30 (the peak physical attractiveness timescale in respect to a lifetime), there are significantly more eye-catching women than likewise men. In sheers numbers analysis alone, this will naturally bring about more men complimenting women than the inverse.
· Another major reason (and most likely the main reason) is because a woman knows her primary attribute in attracting men is through her physical looks, therefore as an instinctive and innate habit derives an incontrollable reluctancy to emphasize a man’s physical blessings, such is her ego and pride acting as a resistance to do so.
· Although, as explained above, hot women largely outweigh hot men in numbers terms, most women’s social and working environmental locations, whether through choice (to feel better about herself) or consequence (as more men are in the workplace than women in most industries), will consist of a male heavy scenario. As most men are beta males – average looking and average in most other desirability metrics – a woman will usually find herself with a man of this kind who will (wrongly, if he harbours ambitions to keep her interested in him) deliver acts of ass kissing her, over-complimenting, and feeling he needs to roll down the red carpet. These male acts only serve to elevate a woman’s self-opinion which is stretched out of the objectivity parameters, and with this over-elevated mindset allows her to believe she is more beautiful than she is. All this manifests into jealousy towards men who stand out more than she does.
· Although age dependant on a percentage basis, by and large women place far less emphasis on male physical impressiveness than men place on female beauty. This will direct women’s compliments onto men, usually indirectly, in the form of his profession, residence, intelligence, confidence, personality, money and assets, rather than his impressive face, body and height.
With all this being the undeniable case for those who see life through truthful eyes and ears, why would a very rare situation exist where the young woman exposed her praise onto a man like me, and in the meantime making no excuse or shield in doing so? Pure and simple: she wanted to get one over the likely cocky young men in her social gathering.
Why is this the case?
Men are more confident than women. I’d go as far to say that nine out of ten men are more confident than nine out of ten women. Naïve and inexperienced men can be fooled in believing that if a woman is hot, and she dresses well and acts in a way that appears so busy and popular, she is also confident. Nothing could be further from the truth. Most women are insecure and self-conscious, and this by no means reduces as you climb up the female hotness ladder. In my experience, most hot women are more insecure and self-conscious than cute or average looking women (in the same way, cute women are more self-conscious and insecure than plain janes).
On the total other extreme, a half-decent looking man in his late teens/early 20’s thinks he can take on the world. He hasn’t gone through many, if any, worn torn experiences that offer him a balanced view and thought-process of highs and lows, strengths and weaknesses he attains, successes and failures that are accustomed to life, and a true evaluation or knowledge of how people view him. This is, if you like, the enviable obliviousness of male youth – a rubber ball internal mentality that ignores self-deficiencies but highlights self-perceived greatness. This mentality is in spite of many deficiencies that do exist, and likewise a greatness that is non-existent.
But with this rubber ball mindset produces an air of male confidence that is accustomed to he who overstates any praise exposed onto him and who can deflect any criticism away from him. Therefore, a man in his late teens/early 20’s, along with his army of equally “take on the world thinking” male friends, can bring about an inner opinion considerably higher than his objective value. Ultimately, a man at the raw age of 20 may only be 7/10 in the physical looks offerings, but the life he lives and the mind he owns believes he is at least an 8/10. If he drives a Ford Focus with a slightly enhanced engine injection, his brain can believe it is on the level of a Ferrari.
This level of confidence that sits way above his objective value is good for attracting women, if used cleverly and discretely. Women love confident men, even arrogant men to an extent, and it is a far better road to take than extreme modesty (it can be argued that if you are a very good looking man it is better to air on the side of humility than over-confidence, but based on most men being average looking this will not be the advice I give for most men). Nevertheless, due to female insecurity and low-confidence as explained beforehand, a cocky man can easily puncture a woman’s ego and put her nose out of joint.
All this illustration will primarily, probably solely, explain why the young woman raised her voice to state a man walking past is “very good looking.” She wasn’t at all interested in me from a getting to know each other perspective, and I’d be more than predictive to say that if I saw her one on one in another social environment and I opted to engage with her, there’s a fair chance she would give me the cold shoulder. Just call it the law of averages, based on my experience and intuition.
The true reason she said what she said was to get one over the men sitting on the same table with her. She wanted to emphasize that, no matter how good looking the men on her table think they are, they’re not even close to the level of the man who walked past. If one of guys was the boyfriend of one the other women, this would only further motivate her to say it. In that moment, she purely used me as the bullet to kill her enemies. Her voice, in analogy terms, was simply the weapon that fired me.
Q-Tip 1:No man will ever be good with women until he understands the way they think, act and speak. He needs to accept her motives for any delivery she partakes. This, unfortunately to many men, will mean you have to stop polishing her rosy ass, no matter how hot she is, and accept that this harshness and acceptance of ugly truths in life will only serve to benefit you in the longer haul.
A Final Thought
It’s a worthwhile note that this woman, as like all her female friends sitting alongside, were at least ten years younger than me. Socially, the average woman in her early twenties will much prefer a social network with female and male associates of similar age. Sexually, or in physical attractiveness projection terms, at least half of this same compartment of women prefer men a decade older who have looked after themselves physically. This is pure and simply because a man of 30 who has looked after himself will look much more physically attractive than his 20-year-old former self.
Q-Tip 2:Older men must accept that, even if a considerably younger woman finds him sexually attractive, more than half of these women will likely opt to not take things any further with him due to the age gap. Likewise, women (mainly bitter women post 30) also need to accept that a decent percentage of much younger female counterparts will actively look to be with a considerably older man.