“Aim low, and you’ll achieve safe satisfaction at best.
Shoot high, and the world is yours for the taking.”
Subconsciously, I think my observations towards the dynamics of strangely matched couples in visual terms came about near to when I was old enough to start dating in serious terms myself. In fact, it would have started before this time in my life. When I recollect the number of pretty girls at school with ugly, smelly, dirty (but perhaps high social profile) boys, it could well have commenced prior to 13 candles founded in my birthday cake.
Needless to say, the mismatches were, in 9 cases out of 10 back then, a vision of cute girl with mediocre looking boy. As time went on, and in view of today, this visual imbalance occurrences is of a similar ratio – where the woman is better looking than the man. In the rare cases where you will see a man as the better looking figure, there are 3 usual possibilities:
- A very good looking man with a cute (but not hot) woman. This is partly due to cute women being at least 10 fold more common than hot female counterparts, but more down to the undeniable fact that hot women do not like the uncomfortable feeling it brings in being with a man of equal or greater physical allure relativity.
- A low confident average looking man with a woman even less blessed than him. These moments do not strike up much notice from the watching public, because it isn’t as if they are struck by him in the first place. Nevertheless, his lacking of confidence, combined with the need for an easy (yet uninspiring) life, results in this collision.
- Couples above the age of 40. This pattern only further magnifies and pronounces as the years go by from this milestone. Simply put, women physically age quicker and worse than men. So, on the basis the couple are of similar age, if the woman was the more impressive at 20, 25, 30 or even 35, this gap decreases for every passing year. Once 40 strikes, the man in this bond often becomes the “better looking” out of the two.
As I’ve documented on this blog, if judged objectively with no agenda or ego attached to your grading, you will do well to see a good looking man with anything below an average looking woman half a dozen times in a lifetime. With the inverse scenario – hot woman alongside a mediocre or worse man – and you could see the same number in a matter of days.
A stand-out moment
There was one particular Sunday evening about 6 years ago that still stays with me to this day. I met my brother at a pub style restaurant to catch up and take a bite to eat. Sat on the table next to us was a woman who looked about 28, and she possessed a pretty face, a decent shaped body, and clean, straight dark hair. She was a solid 8/10 in physical attractiveness.
The man with her had the shaven/receding hair going on. He was slightly muscular induced, but not in a good way as could be seen by his beer gut and wobbly chin fat. He was facially average at best, and when the two of them stood up, she was a couple of inches taller than him. Granted, this could have been her heels platforming above him, but he was no taller than 5ft 8 inches. In any case, a 6.25/10 rating is the best I could give him. He looked 5 to 7 years older than her.
On the same table sat two children. I’d say the daughter was about 13, and this age estimate would be backed up by the annoying habit of her sitting for the whole hour looking down at a mobile phone with no effort to talk. The son was 2 or 3 years younger, and he sent all conversation in the direction of his father.
There was no chemistry at all between the two kids and the woman. All I could see was the man trying to keep everyone from scratching the other’s eyes out, in the way any man appears to do so when it involves his children from previous endeavours, and his new girlfriend. Does this sound familiar to anyone? One minute he is sucking up to his loved one, the next moment unsuccessfully checking to see if the youngsters are behaving appropriately. Make no mistake about it, she was not the mother here.
But to cap it all off, when the waitress brought the bill, guess who paid for it? Her! This was the part that totally broke my stride. Usually, this is the bargain in events of this kind. He upgrades to gain her beauty, and in return she receives gestures like a free meal. For the record, they walked off hand in hand, so nothing greater than visual conspicuous differences, it so seemed.
I’m most certainly no stranger in seeing, or understanding, why women choose lesser looking men. Posts within this blog will more than give evidence to these imbalances. I’m fully aware that provisioning capabilities, charisma, attitude and status can bridge the gap to allow a man in upgrading. I further know, and believe this is an even stronger reason, that female high egoism, high insecurities, low trust levels and low confidence issues play an even greater part to why they will take a less visually admired man as a longer term partner.
Pre-selection,and the draw of being a father and ex-husband, also plays a major role in female projected attraction onto men. The proof of his love from another woman, combined with the challenge to prove she is a “greater” woman than his ex, add the competitive emotional needs that many women, sadly, thrive on. Women who deny this, in justification that their peers who act in this way are bad people, should be very carefully watched. Every woman has a price to defeat her morals, pride and integrity, and when the right man comes along, all this is thrown out of the window if it means securing him.
But in this particular case, I can only draw to one conclusion. Was it his looks? No. Was it his physical security? Based on his lack of height, no. Money? I doubt it, although you could say he was a genius in making her show investment in him by picking up the food cheque. Style? Definitely not from what was seen that night. Positive body language and firm attitude? Well, not in the way he was acting in trepidation of her happiness. His shoulders seemed to slouch too as he walked off. Status? Hard to know for sure, but it’s not like flocks of people were asking for his autograph. Interaction strategy/game/knowledge of red pill/female emotional psychology? Come on!!
No, when it boils down to it, some women just don’t like to be left on the shelf. A woman of 28, even though still physically attractive enough to go toe to toe with her younger competitors, will not like the knowledge that time is ticking on, that friend by friend appear like they have met the man of their dreams (which is clearly rarely the case, but women are naïve by only believing through blinkered eyes if their friend exploits her “happiness”), and most importantly, that the outside world thinks she is not important or valuable. When this is the outcome, and it is far more common with women as they get past 25, they may just be inclined to settle for what comes first. In this case, maybe this low calibre man just so happened to roll his dice on the right number at the right time.
A final thought
As stated above, pre-selection and past female confirmation of love is a huge draw for men in respect to attracting other women. It really cannot be underestimated. However, an important lesson can be taken on board by men and women alike when considering the anecdote in this post.
You may have noted that this particular occasion was on a Sunday evening. When relationships fail and children were birthed, by vast majority men will have access to see their kids at the weekend only. Occasionally, he may pick them up from school once in the week. Sometimes this limited access will be due to the woman being a bitch when settlement contracts were devised, but it can also be a consequence of male fatherhood apathy and appetite too. Either way, the man almost always has more time to himself than the woman.
If all else is equal, and although women feed positively off men with children in the opposing way that men negatively look upon women who are mothers from previous times, it is no mean coincidence that the fact non-biological kids are not there 24/7 acts as an aid to assist a relationship of this kind when the man is a current father. The new woman will only need to see the little shits – shits who are no responsibility to her – on rare occasions within the week. Flip the coin, and a
sucker man taking on a woman with kids from
a previous fella will do well to not fall over toys when he is making the
tea. Simply put, the novelty wears off
much quicker when it becomes a nature of secondary habits.
Lucky for current mothers, most men who take you on will, despite what you say or think, be stricken with options in the sexual market. The reason he is with you is because he believes he can do no better. If any man was put on a lie detector and asked the question to which identical twin sister he would prefer, with one being a mother and the other being single, who do you honestly think he would choose?
P.s. See you in a few weeks. I’m off down under for a short while….
Have a nice trip!ReplyDelete
It's an interesting place if you haven't been there before.ReplyDelete
Appreciate it. If I don't come back, it will be because I fell off the Harbour Bridge climb! A post on Aussie women will also be on the radar.ReplyDelete
What are your thoughts on this?ReplyDelete
Do good looking guys really have this much power?
I think there is another element you may be overlooking, that he makes the money and she holds the purse strings and controls it.ReplyDelete
If they've been together for a while this def applies often.
She holds the credit cards, but he's the one paying.