The perfect man in a woman’s eyes: part 3

“We all make mistakes, and we all have strengths and weaknesses.  But some of us too arrogant and ignorant to monitor the things we excel in, simultaneous to denial of improving our acknowledged shortcomings.”

One more time for the music….

Protecting and secure partner

The woman alongside this man feels safe with him.  He radiates calm, but offers safety.  If a “low-life” man confronts them, he stands in front of her whilst avoiding confrontation with these thug types of guys.  He shows he is the bigger person by walking away, but always guarding her first.  In previous generations, a woman needed a man to be hard on the outside but soft in the middle.  Times have evolved, and this man has moved with the times.  He is softer on the outside, but strong in the middle.  

Of course, he is aware there are a small segment of women who would like him to stop and fight, usually as much for the drama and their attention ego boost for the belief two people would fight for her.  However, this man knows these are the low calibre women he wouldn’t want to be near.  If a woman doesn’t suit his needs, he’ll happily walk away, and this keeps his girlfriend on her toes.  On the other hand, although he is firm, he is quick to show his own gratitude towards her when she has acted accordingly.  He values her every bit as much as a beta character male, but he isn’t afraid to lose her, such is his belief other women find him attractive.  This attitude allows him to avoid the usual jealous, desperate and possessive ways so accustomed to a perennial nice guy.

Sexual prowess

This man has standards in a woman that need to reach his required level, but he also isn’t over selective.  Due to this, he has had a decent number of previous sexual relationships with various types of women.  Numbers give variety, variety feeds experience, and experience rewards in efficiency.  He is skilled in bed, and he knows how to satisfy and please a woman, but most of all he knows how to satisfy himself first.  Men may be led to believe by do-gooders that they should place all female needs first, but women love the men the most who put themselves first.  The reason they find this so attractive and sexy is because it illustrates a man who isn’t afraid to upset, and as a ramification to lose, a woman.   

Without being immensely good looking, or sculptured in a defined bodily physique sense, he turns her on viscerally.  This is in the way of dominating her, showing leadership and diversion in the bedroom, and captivating her in a world of sexual fantasy.  In an era where women have become more independent, they still need a man who can lead and guide them, and nothing underlines this more than when they take each other’s clothes off.  He recognizes a woman’s sexual needs, and he understands women in general.

Knowledge of female emotional mentality

This brings it appropriately onto his strongest asset - he understands a woman’s mind and the psychology that goes hand in hand with their emotional decisions.  Likewise, he holds a thorough comprehension to the distinction in the varying types of female personas, and how to adapt accordingly without changing his natural demeanour and principles.  Whether through natural senses or learning over time, past mistakes and triumphs, he has reached a stage in his life when he knows the strengths and weaknesses in women, the trials and tribulations that come with the territory of relationships, and the way they are unique in their own manner.  In a similar way, he has collated general characteristics in women, and he has drawn conclusions to where a man’s interaction strategy can usually work a treat.  He may have undertaken hours of study in addition to this, but the end product is one of a male who is far more aware of the way women work in comparison to the majority of clueless men out there. 

He assesses the time to give them space, there is the need to sometimes act aloof and reserved, there is his element of surprising them, there is his comprehension to the inundated amounts of men trying too hard – only to end up in the friends’ zone with women.  Most of all, he has realized women and life do not go hand in hand with the logics of life.  The phrase of “the more you give, the more you get” is rarely true, and whilst there are times this is necessary, by hanging to the other extreme – bad boy character in lieu of nice guy deliverables - he acknowledges success with women is far more likely.  With this consideration, he only tells her he loves her as much as she speaks the same words to him, and in the main he will wait for her to say it first.  Whilst women need to feel valued by the main man in their life, they also need to be in awe of him without being intimidated. 

Interaction with women

Fundamentally, he has studied how to acquire interaction strategy – otherwise known as game – when dealing with women on intimate terms.  A woman’s natural psychological make-up for intensity and drama causes her to have a level of requirement for a man to test her.  It is usually an unawareness of maneuvers in her mind, but it leaves a man, even the most genuine of a man, to counteract this approach with a strategy of his own.  He knows as much as any other man that it’s a shame the world has come to this, but he has learnt from numerous encounters that a woman’s habits in this respect are not isolated cases.  They are the majority rather than the exception.  However, due to his astute and relaxed outlook of life, he adapts to an extent that isn’t harmful to the woman he is with, but more importantly, he ensures his own welfare is always in check.  If it reaches the stage where she apparently attains the thrill of mind games to an unreasonable degree, whether by accident or deliberation, he will walk away. 

This man knows not every woman is to the extreme of this nature, but he accepts it is necessary to not play by her rules.  Over time, she will quietly, although deniably, be happier for this challenge.  So he can identify with women, but he only lets her aware of this to a point.  If he exploited this knowledge, he would place her in the realms of vulnerability and insecurity, due to her fear that she will never feel enough power in the relationship.  He always remembers that women need to believe they have a level of power - they just do not need to consciously be told of this.  Likewise, she needs to believe her man has power over her, but she should never reach the point when she is certain of this.  Fiction can rule a woman’s mind, but facts can force her to run away.

Acknowledging the detriments of male vanity

Another decisive pulling point this man has over the vast majority of men, and especially good looking men, is his comprehension to how women view a male and his reflection.  This is one of the biggest mistakes men of high physical impressiveness fall into, and it involves a woman’s opinion of vain men, and above all the one she is dating.  A woman likes nothing more than her man to look after himself and maximize his potential, however if he spends even a quarter of as much time as her to glamour up, then he will be seen upon in negative eyes.  In fairness, it is slightly hypocritical and inconsistent of women to have this feeling, but no woman wants to fight over mirror time with her lover.  Further to this, a man confident of his looks does not need to spend much effort in grooming, as he is assured and secure in his own skin. 

This man leaves her to the beauty room, and he waits downstairs for an hour watching the football before complimenting her on her beauty.  Not that he is in awe of her beauty, as once a man starts to think this way then he is on a rapid road to a mentality of believing he should be privileged to be with her.  An astute man will always believe, without saying the actual words, that a woman should be privileged to be with him.  This confident thought is only true because he takes a broad view of other men’s strengths and weaknesses, and the implication they have on high quality women.  As he doesn’t live in his own bubble, and he has an extensive interest in human interaction, it is easy for him to pick up on many areas where so many men are failing in a variety of ways.    

Balanced mindset

If ever there was a pertinent word to define the perfect man, it would have to be balance.  This would closely be followed by versatility.  In any case, the two words are inter-linked towards his success with women and life as one.  He isn’t naïve - in thinking all the world is good and selfless.  He isn’t a cynic, in believing the entire world is greedy and selfish.  He falls into the ‘Zen’ category, by understanding that some people are selfish, some aren’t, and knows how to connect to them and how not to be used, and genuinely likes people and appreciates them for who they are.

This outlook is further emphasized with his thoughts of women.  He knows the world isn’t perfect, and this is never more apparent than with the females he interacts with.  However, he has learnt to take the good points in them before the bad, and this is mainly down to the perspective gained throughout the years.  He has come to the conclusion that any immature comments or compliance tests they may use in attempt to de-value him are born out of jealousy, bitterness and insecurity.  He knows that if a woman goes out of her way to bring him down, it is the highest back-handed compliment a man ever needs.  When she does make these weak attempts, he acts in calmness, and refrains from over-reacting in the way she is accustomed to with most men’s implementations. 

Nobody stands further away from supplication than this guy, as he disqualifies any woman who doesn’t show interest in him.  There are too many other quality women to dwell over one who is, more often than not, giving him undue receptiveness for being out of her attainability spectrum.  He achieves this mindset because of his belief in his options outside of a woman he is interested in, or the woman he is in a relationship with.  Although he adores the feeling of empathetic love with one woman, he holds onto the mentality that they are fundamentally interchangeable.  Options, or lack of choices, are the selling point to a man in determining if he falls on desperation or carefree extremes.  Needless to say, the majority of women take more fondly to the latter.

Context of true human value

He acknowledges that whilst many women may seem unapproachable, unreceptive or unfriendly, this is usually out of their insecurities, self-consciousness or vain hope to feel and demonstrate a higher value than reality shows to the rest of the world.  He is fully comprehended to the pronounced manner women act in this way to convince themselves of external validation and importance.  He knows that most women would prefer to act amicably all the time in their interaction with men, but imperceptible and wrongly assumed belief that an illustration of interest is a sign of weakness, refrains them from acting in this natural way.  This man knows that most women, once approached, are actually appreciative of the effort and courage it takes to genuinely and unconditionally engage with someone unknown to him.  Most of all, he enjoys the company of women, and he sees upon them as human beings but not secluded princesses that so many men perceive them to be.  He has realized that women can only make his life brighter, and most importantly, they can never destroy the contribution he brings to the world. 

Other people are just the same to him, whether they are tramps off the street or people of extreme fame or status.  No woman he has met in his life is a cut above his worth to the world, but on the other hand he also does not see himself as anything special too.  Even if he is aware of his worth due to the inundated compliments from other people over the years, he acts in obliviousness, with humility at the forefront.  He is fully aware of his value without exploiting it, as he holds this innate ability to not take himself, or life, too seriously.

Conclusion

This man doesn’t desire to be alienated, irrespective of his value.  All he wants in life is to be happy, for others to be happy around him, and for people to wake up in the morning with the sun shining in wait of a new day.  If it rains, so be it, as life is precious to him and there are always motives for him to accomplish.  Every day his objective is to begin each day as if it were on purpose, with no issue at work too intensive to tackle.  A problem to most people is a challenge to him.  He knows this mental outlook isn’t always possible, but life is too short to spend it wondering what might have been, pondering on regrets, or wishing you were living the life of someone else.  The perfect man is happy in the person he has become, he is unapologetic if this viewpoint doesn’t impress everyone, and he would never waste time trying to change in pleasing other people. 

He hasn’t got the time or inclinations to second guess women, and he forms a firm mentality that allows him to believe, with the right amount of compromise on his part, that women can take it or leave it in terms of whether they hold desires to be with him.  He values and appreciates the beauty, greatness, exclusivity and complexities women bring to his life, but he also knows that women are replaceable – by both other women and other events in life - once they start to behave the way he doesn’t have predilections to.  This relaxed mood rubs off on the women he dates, and they see him as a guy who isn’t afraid to lose out, as another female conquest will be available on another given day if they begin to act out of accordance.   Ultimately, the crucial reason why women find him appealing is that he doesn’t endeavour, or desire, to be someone he could never be.