Wednesday, 15 June 2022

Feral girl summer – a load of cobblers

 

                                            “You can’t win unless you learn how to lose.                                                (Kareem Abdul-Jabbar)

  

Call me behind the contemporary times, or simply being savvy in spending my time on useful reading, pastimes or alike, but I’d never heard of this feral girl summer rubbish until a few days ago.  Like most female memes of today, the words mean little to the substance.  In other words, anyone can say anything they like, but if they don’t act out these words in practice, or they always have a price where they bow down to hypocrisy, then the meme isn’t worth the paper it’s written on as far as I’m concerned.

What is a feral girl?

Why hear it from me, when you can hear it from a feral girl herself linked to this article:

To be "feral" is to go against the expectation to be more organized and more optimized, or to strive for a clean lifestyle. As this TikToker put it, "I will never wake up at 5am to drink green juices and be hyper organized. I will instead be in 4am reddit holes, diet coke first thing in the morning." It's like a more energized version of goblin mode.

What is feral girl summer?

Once more, answered by the feral girl…

Feral girl summer is the act of causing good trouble and having carefree times at any location in 2022 — from party settings to the pantry — during the summer season.

Above all, feral girl summer encourages tossing caution (in regard to fear of judgment, at least) to the wind and having fun.

“Time to wreak havoc, cause chaos, align your rodent chakras, and just completely get after it,” one post on TikTok about feral girl summer encouraged. “Life is supposed to be fun.”

In easy language…

Allow me to give you a proper and honest explanation to what these young (and some older) women are saying.

In essence, a feral girl (or a woman on a feral girl summer) is effectively thinking that she can do what she wants without any accountability, without any responsibility, without a care to what people think of her, without any concern to the consequences it brings on herself or other people, and without any thought to the judgement those will have on her actions and life choices.  In that same timeframe, she believes that other people, including male suitors, should and will just accept her for what her all so mighty presence brings to the world.

Why do women get away with this?

As pitiful as this attitude and life execution is, the reality is that a high percentage (>60%) of women in the western world will get away with this to a great extent.  I offer the following reasons why:

·       An oversized male population (>80%) which consists of weak beta males, lapdogs, men lacking any grain of knowledge in how to deal with women and put them in their place, men so desperate for sex that they turn a blind eye to any female habit that in reality is a huge distaste to them, and men who have no idea how to tell a woman that the choices she makes will be a big mistake.

·       A growing “girl power” and feminist culture we live in - brainwashing young women into thinking they can just live a fun life, and any mistakes can be picked up by others or resurrected later down the line.

·       A lack of firm father figure leadership to forbid her from making poor decisions in life.

·       Single parent upbringing where fathers are, either entirely or in the main, absent from offering any guidance or opinion on key decisions in her lifestyle.

·       Mothers, older sisters, older female friends, and older female work colleagues or social acquaintances who, such is the year-on-year growth of female immaturity and fear of getting older, promote the whole “fun girl” lifestyle rather than providing efficient advice to what will benefit said feral girl the most.

·       The social media craze that promotes women to exploit their fun-loving lifestyle to show the world they are having such an exciting time out there.

The problem with this is….

Sure, women can get away with this mentality, way of living, and behaviour with most men – as explained in the first bullet point above.  These men are low sought-after in the dating market, and as the majority of men fall into this bracket, there will nearly always be a male taker for any half-decent (or greater) looking woman out there. 

The problem arises when women actually desire, and why wouldn’t they, a higher sought-after man.  These men are much rarer and harder to find, as men in this coveted compartment are found in a ratio of at least 1:5 in comparison to good-looking women.  In theory then, these men will not only select a hot woman, but they will decide which woman is worthy of his selection based on other desirables (mainly personality, small number of sexual partner history, lifestyle, loyalty, faithfulness, and likeability) she can bring to the table.

Therefore, if women aspire for more than just the run of the mill man who makes her feel better about herself due to his comparative physical ugliness and willingness to kiss her rosy ass, then she needs to think about the repercussions to her implementations.

Feral girl lifestyle is unforgiving

The other big consideration, and most likely the biggest implication, to this pathetic feral girl conditioning is the fact that this lifestyle takes no prisoners free of charge.  I’ve seen it with my own two eyes on countless occasions.

Just in the last few weeks I could count on two hands where I’ve seen women in the gym – ranging from cute (7/10) to lower hot (8/10), who seem to flip flop between two to three weeks of regular attendance, followed by a no show for a couple of weeks.  On each and every occasion on their return, there is a pronounced level (even though not excessive) of extra fat sitting in their arses, upper thighs, arms and neck on the first day when coming back to training.

I’d hedge a fair bet that this decreased attendance at the gym in this truancy timeframe coincided with a few too many nights out, accompanied with poor dietary routine.  The point is, even at a female age of late teens or early twenties, a woman’s body is, absent of incredibly kind genetics, unforgiving to a lapse in physical exercise and increase in higher/poorer calorie intake.

Q-tip:

The smartest women know what the highest quality men hunger from them, and these women tailor their lifestyle to suit said man’s requirements.  The dumber women, or perhaps the most arrogant and ignorant women, simply do what they (women) want to do, in either naively believing any man will make any dispensations for her fun-loving times, or more likely knowing she can always settle for the masses of low regarded men who will always be forgiving to her ill-advised choices.

A final thought

One thing I will say, as a saving grace if it can be seen such a way, is that the majority of women, even women who hold a far greater need for attention, self-indulgence and ego massaging (which just so happens to be most women of today in the west) than the motivation to be attractive to men, are smart enough to know where the boundaries lie in terms of how far a said feral girl can push these limits.

What I mean by this is that whilst a woman loves the feeling of feeling better about herself and holding thoughts that the world is watching her, most of them do usually hold the knowledge to be comprehensive that sleeping around with men quicker than they can lift their pants up from the last one who nailed her is not productive at all.  No man is attracted to a woman who attains a reputation for sleeping around no matter how hot she is, and this even includes the most desperate and undesirable men out there.  If a certain man still goes for this kind of woman, it isn’t because he is turned on by her notch count.  It is because he is desolate and petrified that this slag is the only woman who will take him.

With this acknowledged, it kind of all loopholes back to how the modern-day western woman can be summarised.  In essence, her ego is bigger than her heart, but she will still moderate this obsession for attention and feel-good factor in order to eradicate any brakes being placed on the best life she can provide for herself.


Acknowledgements

https://www.today.com/popculture/popculture/what-is-feral-girl-summer-meaning-rcna28179

Wednesday, 1 June 2022

How nice or jerky should a man be?

 

“Save in the good times, spend in the bad times.”

  

I tend to think to think that most men, on more than a few occasions in their life, have asked themselves or others why certain women end up with men who treat them badly.  It’s a question most men will ask, as contrary to what many fallacy mindset women will try and convince you (and herself), most men (>80% of men) are nice guys.

Q-tip 1:

It is an easy link for women to broadcast that most men are jerks, because women do not like to face up to the reality that most relationships and interactions consist of the woman playing with the man’s emotions, far more often than the inverse scenario. 

Where do I stand on this topic?  As always, I like to illustrate the variables before issuing the answer.  Although this post was devised over eight years ago, and granted my writing is most likely more polished now than it was then, nothing has occurred in the interim time to change my view one bit.  Time will pass, life may change, but women’s emotional habits, psychology and decision-making generally stay the same.

Whilst I would fully recommend reading the full post, I snapshot the following:

·       The hotter the woman, the more of a jerk the man should be.

·       The less attractive the woman, the more beneficial it is to do nice things for her.

·       Any man, with any woman, should not be too nice, and he should not be too nice all the time.

·       The more physically attractive (especially 8/10 or greater) the man, the more productive his niceness will be.

·       The less physically attractive (in particular below 7/10) the man, the more productive his jerkiness will be.

·       The bigger the gap in physical attractiveness between the woman and man – where she is (in usual scenarios) better looking than him, the more of a jerk the man needs to be.

·       The smaller the gap in physical attractiveness between the man and woman (and in particular in rare situations where he is as or more physically attractive than her in gender relative terms), the nicer, within reason, the man needs to be.

·       Even a hot man (say 8.5/10) hitting on a cute woman (say 7/10), in spite of the above points, should not construe being too nice as being beneficial.  It is simply more a case of not being too cocky, arrogant, or apathetic.  The nuance should not be oversighted.

·       Men should not be too giving, in both emotional and monetary terms, too early on in the relationship dynamic.  If he is, he sets himself up for a fall later on.

·       If a man attains other appeal blessings – personality, wealth, high status, charisma, style etc – in addition to his top end physical attractiveness, he needs to be a margin nicer in comparison to the equally good-looking male counterpart without these none male beauty positives. 

·       An aesthetically pleasing man with very little else to offer – hence, a lunkhead jerk – should just continue being a jerk.  There are enough cute and hot women out there who love jerks for being jerks to outweigh the jerks in number per se, and him becoming nice would only serve to lose his own unique (or at least rare) selling point.

·       If a woman has a self-opinion of herself that is higher than what she truly has to offer (hence mainly her physical beauty), a man consequently needs to crank up his jerkiness level to align with her self-leverage. 

The limitations of nice guy / jerk online information field

I do not mind saying that I’m quite critical of the information given to men on this subject – information and advice distributed by both women and men. 

My critique towards women advising men will always be primarily due to the fact that women by nature, and this includes even the more honest women out there, will often inform men that they (men) should do the things that aren’t in conjunction with how women truly feel or how women act out in reality.  Don’t get me wrong, some female writers and vloggers do give a reasonable amount of honest counselling, but it seems to me like they are incapable of doing this in entirety. 

My condemnation towards a lot of male instructors was alluded to further up.  That is, these men are only offering one source of instruction on a one size fits all basis.  They are, or at least the vast majority are, never taking into consideration the variables which impact on the sweet spots between niceness and jerkiness in so far as analysing robustly the differing calibre of the woman and man within the dynamic.

Maybe this is due to time constraints?  I accept that to put a video together (and to a lesser extent, a written post) with all the editing involved is a hard enough task as it is, therefore to sub-divide each inconstant as I subscribed above (and there are a few more I haven’t shown) may be beyond feasibility.  On the other hand, are they just ignorant to the variables, or too bloody-minded to accept this is a major implication on the final product and end results?

A final thought

When all is said and done, and with all the complexities to consider as explained above, it perhaps is an easy conclusion for a man to simply say that he should just be himself, and let the rest take care of itself.  This argument could be further reinforced when you consider that, when you do not know a woman personally, you only have your gut instincts and past life experience with other similar women to fall on.  She could in fact be different to your perception of how she is.

To be fair, this isn’t half bad advice.  If a man obtains the knowledge that women are complex creatures, and he holds the authority that she just accepts him for who he is and the rest is the rest, then in theory this approach should be a golden ticket.  It is effectively then, in theory, no skin of his nose either way.

The problem is, this is, as repeated, in theory.  In practice, most men do get stressed over women, they do get manipulated by women, and they usually leave the scene of crime with more questions than answers simultaneous to placing his head in his hands.  Therefore, a man being himself in isolation to anything else, as good as it sounds on paper, rarely can be used in practice to reap the final rewards.

This is why I always think there is a sweet spot to strike between the two schools of thought.  I agree that a man should not change his general persona and habits for a woman (although compromises always have a place in my life), however this should be in conjunction with ascertaining the full grasp of how women are psychologically and emotionally made up, and how their decisions are a by-product of this.  When you mix the two pieces of the puzzle together – being yourself in addition to understanding women - perhaps then it will genuinely be no skin off your nose.

Q-tip 2:

Many men are outright misogynists, and they detest women of all kinds because of the ill experiences they have sustained.  Believe it or not, there are some men out there who know women for what they are, they choose to tailor their game to how women will act, they accept the outcomes for what they will be, and they gain pleasure in sharing these experiences (which will sometimes be failures of some nature, coupled with more than a few success stories) to benefit the good guys of the world in hope of a brighter day for them.  I guess it is up to others to distinguish between the two types of men as exampled.

Wednesday, 11 May 2022

Finding positives from negatives

 

“The only thing we all have in common is the fact we’re getting older.”

  

I felt a bit sorry for my little step-nephew a couple of weeks ago when I heard he got upset that his younger brother didn’t want him hanging around with his (the older brother’s) new girlfriend and her friend.  There is only a couple of years between the two boys – aged eight and ten. 

Even at a tender age of eight, the mind can become jealous and lonely just like any adult.  The brain mechanism is the same, and the only real difference is an adult’s life experience and brain (and body) muscle memory which should allow them to gain perspective of any low time of life they go through.  Unfortunately, too many adults age at a mental maturity rate that does not keep up with their aligned chronological years. 

An equivalent low point from my past

I remember going through a similar phase at around thirteen.  I wasn’t an ugly kid by any stretch, quite cute in fact, but I went through puberty contextually late, and I was naturally skinny.  With these factors assigned, I wasn’t exactly a boy with much female interest projected onto me.  And as any man can relate to, as could even boys of today, the girls that liked you back then are never the girls you liked back.

It seemed like I lived year or so when nearly every boy in my network - a close friend or otherwise - seemed to be coupling off with a girl for every day that passed by.  Naturally, some of these couples were doing nothing more than hanging together in a group (some of them maybe never even kissed), but it was still a girlfriend/boyfriend status all the same.

Perhaps more importantly to whether it ranged from never holding hands to early sexual experiences, with everything in between, was that irrespective these boys who picked up a girl were never available to socialise.  What was once after school football every day turned into hanging around shops.  Regular video game nights were soon played on my own.  Phone calls to their house were answered by parents saying he was out.  I felt so alone, and the days seemed awfully long.

My older brother was great, and he, even if reluctantly or forced by my parents, involved me with his peer sport games.  Nevertheless, it didn’t take long for me to subconsciously realize they begrudgingly had to take it easy on me or just thought I was a nuisance.  One of them even told me to “fuck off”, which made me feel even lower about myself!

How did it all turn out or get better? 

Honestly, I cannot recall the exact how’s and when’s regarding a brighter day.  I guess it just happened naturally, and over incremental time.  Perhaps by fourteen or fifteen I matured to a level where more of the popular girls didn’t just think I was invisible.  Maybe (or most likely probably), in retrospect, some of the boys were dumped by their girlfriends.  On fewer occasions, the boys even jettisoned from the girls.

Ultimately, the cold and dark days became warmer and lighter in metaphoric terms, and as explained above, the brain muscle memory allows us to wake up a little more positive than the day before.  A bit like the stock market, nothing goes in a straight line up or down, and there will be bumps along the way with your emotions and mindset.  But again, like stocks, most of the time, with patience, the general trajectory is up and to the right.

Positives from negatives mentality brought into adult life

I’m a firm believer that your childhood plays a huge part in how you manifest as an adult, and how you cope with the tribulations life throws at you.  Yes, I know of isolated people who transformed almost unrecognizably in character from a kid to a man (or woman), but by and large you never fully lose the genetics with which you were born.

Q-tip 1:

In my opinion, seventy percent of your adult character is a by-product of the genetics you inherited – from the personality traits your parents were born with.  Twenty percent is how smart you are, and how in association you can implement this savviness to produce a more positive disposition that is over and above the natural character you were designated.  This leaves, at most, ten percent which can be blagged, masked, and contrived - to fool the majority of innocent people who cannot see through you.

Therefore, if a minimum of seventy percent of what people see in you is formed from your natural character, you need to accept who you are and make the best product out of the tools you were given.  Only a small segment of these tools can be sharpened to build a better final product.

Examples of positives from negatives

This list is not even close to being exhaustive, but from a brainstorming and personal exercise perspective, I offer you these:

Negative 1

I’m not as physically attractive as I would like to be.

Positive Response

When I look around, in practice most of the hottest women don’t go for the hottest men.  Maybe it’s best to not be too aesthetically pleasing as a man!!?

Negative 2

I don’t have as much money as I would like to have.

Positive Response

Most of the time, the more money a man has is a direct consequence of working long, stressful and tiresome hours, in a job he hates.  By not doing this, even if it has meant having less money, the end result is a higher health level and greater physical attractiveness.

Negative 3

I can’t find a suitable woman for wife material.

Positive Response

As enriching as it is to be in love with a woman in the early phases of a relationship, women undeniably cause you stress, they are emotionally inconsistent and volatile, and they cost you a lot more money than when you were single.  You also do not have to answer to anyone when single.

Negative 4

I’ve never had children like my friends.

Positive Response

Children will:

1)    Give you less time for yourself.

2)    Give you less money for yourself.

3)    Offer less opportunity to do or have things in life you could have otherwise.

4)    Give you less opportunity to accomplish personal goals in your life.

5)    Physically age you at a faster rate than not having children.

6)    Increase your stress levels.

Negative 5

I don’t have as many friends as my younger days.

Positive Response

Looking back, most of these “friends” (or at least social acquaintances) only genuinely cared about themselves.  A lot of what we did was a waste of time, a waste of money, and quite frankly nothing to greatly remember with fondness or exhilaration.  I was just a young man doing what I thought was necessary to be social, often out of peer pressure.  At least with fewer social options, I am wasting less time, and spending more time on the things I desire to fulfil.

A final thought

Simply five examples that sprung to mind.  I would expect that many men, especially men in their thirties, forties and fifties, can relate to where I’m shooting from.

Everybody is different, and many people will attain a differing view to me.  It would be boring if we were all the same.  In essence, I’m an avid believer that it doesn’t matter what path of life you believe in, providing you are honest with yourself in assessing each path.  Those that ignore the alternative are usually those who trample through life in blissful, and somewhat arrogant, ignorance.

Q-tip 2:

Nobody truly knows what path in life would have been best for them, as to know this you would require two bodies of yourself living both lives.  Those who say their chosen path was the best are most likely the people who question their decisions the most.

Wednesday, 27 April 2022

Women with high self-opinions

 

“He who holds the money holds the rules.”

  

In truth, such is the escalation of social media sycophancy and supplication received via both suck-up men and female peers, that it should be no surprise to any man with two eyes and decent judgement that the average female self-opinion has increased in line on a year-on-year basis.  It’s a sorry state of affairs if you ask me – oversized female self-opinion over and above any mere sign of humility genuine humility – but it is a compounding implication of life which isn’t leaving us any time soon.

Not that I’m going to be a total hypocrite here.  I have gone down on record within this blog, and I have said in words to many people, that somebody’s self-opinion of themself needs to be marginally higher than their objective (hence what they have to offer in real terms) value.  If it goes below the objectivity mark, then you run the risk of not fulfilling your potential.  However, if it goes too high above the reality of your offerings, a person will likely live day to day in waiting for something that will most likely never happen.

The pros and cons of women with high self-opinions?

There can be two main schools of thought in assessing this:

·       From a negative standpoint (and this will apply to most men), a woman with a high self-opinion will hold very high expectations of what a man should offer and provide for her.  In this case, it is accustomed that these women never think the average man is good enough for her, and she ends up settling for a man who cannot offer what she believes she deserves, or she goes for a man she loves for what he is (therefore his money, status and assets) rather than a man she loves for who he is (hence his physical attraction, personality and charisma).

·       From a positive standpoint (which applies to a small minority of men), a woman with a high self-opinion doesn’t just go for any man in order to satisfy her validation and attention needs.  Whilst these women do have high expectations which are much more leveraged than the average female benchmark, the plus point is that a high percentage of high self-opinionated women will not have received more pricks in her than a dartboard.  Whilst >99% of women will always want to be with a man who is less physically attractive than her, you will conceivably find that a small number of these women (around 20%) may, at least at a younger age, not be as resistant towards men of equal physical attractiveness in gender relative terms.

A recent anecdote

Around last October, an attractive long haired redhead walked in the gym who I had never seen before.  I doubt she was any older than 22.  She was, for me, the perfect height of around 5ft 5”.  A very nice figure, pale skin, and a couple of upper thigh tattoos which I’m quite partial to.  Her face was cute if not stand out.  Anything above an 8/10 in overall physical attractiveness would be too generous in my humble opinion, however a 7.75/10 may be seen as too harsh.  In other words, she was 8/10!

What was noticeable, perhaps after I had seen her for a few times, was that she walked with an air of authority which is rare for women I see these days.  Most women walk with poor body language – head down, shoulders slightly slouched, insecure feel, self-conscious, on the phone to avoid any human eye contact etc.  Whilst this redhead still did the familiar female head down looking at phone concurrent to walking thing, her stride was forceful and one that radiated a degree of confidence in the environment that existed.  Most probably fake confidence, but still a portray which could convince most naive and experience lacking men.

I’d seen her glancing in my direction on nearly every occasion she had been in the gym over those first couple of weeks, and one morning she was training on the next machine to me.  I struck up conversation, but it was transparent early on that her awkward demeanour translated to the high end, simultaneous to her confidence moving a step backwards.  It was clear she didn’t want to talk for long, and she concluded that she needed to crack on with her workout.  I walked off, although she did manage a smile at me as I did.

Over the next six months, the image of high self-opinion traits carried on as explained above.  I continued to see her looking over at me on numerous occasions, although on the rare times we passed each other I can only recall once when she looked me in the eye and smiled.  There was one day when I had no choice (due to a lack of room) but to perform my lunges so close to her stretching exercises.  I remember wearing a nice cologne that day, and it was amusing that another woman I had history with was looking on from five yards away. This was comical on two fronts, as not only could I sense the redhead enjoying the proximity between us, but the other woman is the kind of female who, after time getting to know her, is clearly someone who gets a kick out of fantasizing over a man she likes sexually pleasuring (most likely in a rough and aggressive manner) another hot woman.

There were also two occurrences when I was waiting for a lift on Monday mornings whilst dressed in my work clothes.  On both instances, the redhead walked out when I was there with further attraction in her eyes.  When she drove off, I couldn’t help but see the flick of the hair attraction clue in the mirror as she went by.

As harsh as this sounds, she drives a terrible clapped-out car.  It must be the worst car on the car park.  It is obvious she is a university student due to the times I have seen her leaving the gym, which also explains the beaten-up vehicle ownership in conjunction with a verbal articulation level that is above the average woman in there.  Poor in monetary terms, but reasonably clever you could say!  I’ve been a student myself…

With all this considered, I decided that I would soon have another chat to her when the situation best arose.  That situation came about just last week during a Saturday morning.  In my mind I knew this was likely more of a short-term sexual satisfaction objective (perhaps on her part too).

Well, whilst nothing is a surprise to me when it comes to women’s emotions, receptiveness, attitudes and psychology, it’s fair to say that this time she was even less engaging than the time before.  It wasn’t even worth striking up a second topic with her after a few seconds.  Once again, if ever any further proof was needed, that a woman being sexually attracted to a man is rarely enough to make her pursue with him on an intimacy basis.

Q-tip:

Never let a knock-back put you down.  A knock-back is often a by-product of your worth that situated you there in the first place.

A final thought

As nothing more than my will at looking at reality over what may seem like sour grapes, I think the hasty snub on her part may have been significantly assisted by the following factors:

1)    Even most women aged <24 still prefer a man who is less physically attractive than themselves.  Even at my relatively mature age, I’m pretty sure the vast majority of people would still say I’m 8/10 to 8.25/10. 

2)    As an interchangeable reason to 1), the last couple of weeks (prior to approaching her) in the UK had seen a lot of sunshine.  On the day I approached her, I was probably as tanned as I would be from a summer's week in southern Spain.  She is quite pale if the truth be told (although in the past it appeared she wasn’t a stranger to sunbeds).  This factor most likely added a little bit more inferiority in her mind.

3)    She drives an old-hat car, whilst I drive one of the better cars on the car park.  Although a woman undeniably prefers a man of higher status in wealth and asset terms, it is plausible to believe this gap is once more too wide for her comfort levels.

4)    Going back to a couple of weeks ago when we were working out very close to each other, I sensed it was her most fertile week back then.  In retrospect, it would have been far more productive to talk to her then in comparison to a couple of weeks later when she was back to menstruation phase.  My bad, I guess…

A final, final thought

In conclusion, women attaining high self-opinions are generally not great girlfriend material.  If they are not great girlfriend material, you can bet your bottom dollar that they are not good marriage material. 

Occasionally, especially for the most sought-after men, women with high self-opinions can be beneficial from the perspective of their low notch count, loyalty, and the unspoken knowledge that they chose you because of your male quality metrics. 

Finally, even the very high self-opinion of a woman will not be a weaponry strong enough to ease her insecurity and inferiority when faced with a man who acquires a longer sword than her, so to speak.

Tuesday, 12 April 2022

Women have little emotional balance

  

                                                You don’t have to run faster than the bear.                                                                            You just have to run faster than the guy next to you.”                                         (Jim Butcher)

  

Whilst you will still come across a small minority of women in the Western world who radiate a positive and optimistic demeanour in your social observations, the sad reality is that the large majority discharge a vision of negative presence.  You would like to think that in the last few weeks where it has been extremely hard to ignore the saddening and sickening images seen in Eastern Europe, people will have used these scenes as a way to appreciate what they have in life and to see their own problems in true perspective.  Unfortunately, perspective is an alien word to most.

With the exception of women on nights out when they place a mask over their emotions (although some women still look miserable in these places too), the common sight I see – whether it be in the gym, in the workplace, walking the street, in the supermarket etc – is a female with an expression of misery, seriousness, and a look of attaining the world’s problems on her shoulders.  Even as one of the least compassionate people out there, I still sometimes have a level of sympathy when I see this.  When all said and done, I sincerely only hold desires for good people to be happy.

Why the long face, sweetheart?

In truth, this “misery” should be seen for what it is in real terms.  Yes, sometimes it can be a woman who is just naturally miserable, but far more common is that it is not misery per se.  The reason you will see women, in particular younger women (aged 18 to 30), looking so downbeat is a by-product of the self-consciousness within themselves.  Self-consciousness, and her twin (but not identical twin) sister by the name of insecurity, bring about an uncontrollable, subconscious and defaulted disposition to constantly possess a long face.

Although I can recall many miserable looking women as far as my memory allows, there is no doubting in my mind that the general female occurrence of looking miserable (to reiterate – because of her self-consciousness) has compounded year on year for the last couple of decades.  But why has this been the case, you may be wondering?

Granted, no scientific reasoning can be given as far as I can locate (scientific studies based on female/human emotion are generally a waste of time anyway, such is the reliance on a person’s honesty for validity and credibility), however if you want my two pennies on the main causes, I offer the following:

·       Social Media (Facebook and Instagram mainly).  This has manifested an obsession to try and be popular, combined with a constant conveyor belt of seeing other physically attractive women – whether that be women in their social circles, or celebrity women they follow.  When someone is persistently reminded of numerous popular and attractive women out there, it can only result in said woman looking on in frustration and concern to her own level.

·       Female competition.  With more women than ever using aids to look more physically attractive than they naturally are – whether by the use of make-up, cosmetics, surgical enhancements, or photoshop improvements – once more women are always wondering who is over their shoulder in respect to another woman stealing the show. 

·       Celebrity lifestyle exposure.  Whether it be the woman in the celebrity spotlight via her own right, or the woman in the arms of a celebrity and wealthy man, any random woman not living this life (hence >99.9% of women) will look on in envy of what could be.  Rather than appreciate what we have, the human mind, and in particular the female mind, is channelled to think of what we do not have.

·       Frustration in their own life.  Most people are in jobs they gain very little satisfaction with or liking for.  This applies to men as much as women, but on the basis men have greater perspective than women, women will become more bitter about this predicament.  Likewise, most everyday people are not living the high life in their social time.  Once again though, men generally require less thrill and change up, in comparison to women who need drama, gossip and excitement to broadcast to others.  When women are, usually, on the wrong side of both circumstances, disappointment in life is a hard face to conceal.

·       A shortage of male quality.  As life becomes harder for ‘Average Joe’ to make ends meet, the gap between female expectancy in life and the feasible providing level of the average man has become wider and wider.  A woman who holds standards too high (standards higher than her physical attractiveness can offer men) in men will either stay single and lonely or, more likely, settle for a man who will never be the man she truly wanted to be with.  When this occurs, she ends up resenting both the man she is with, and life.

·       WhatsApp groups.  Not dissimilar to the first explanation with regards to social media, WhatsApp or similar facilities have also been a detriment to women’s happiness.  The Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO) and need to be popular will nearly always rule a woman’s mind over making logical and sensible decisions, but the simple truth is that women now can barely go a few minutes of life without looking at what is going on, and who is living a more exciting (although usually exaggerated in excitement) existence.  Imagine also how much bitching must go on in these female WhatsApp groups.  This can’t lead to too many smiles, that’s for sure.

So, in essence, all the above offers a clear reasoning to why a woman lives most of her life in worry, frustration, envy, and negativity.  This is in place of what it should be - happiness, optimism, positivity, and appreciation of what she has in life.

The flip side of misery

Nevertheless, what you will often find (for men who are brave enough to interact with women they do not know personally) is a woman who plays the total opposite role to what you saw when she had her head down when she walked past you, or when she was in continual viewing and typing of her phone when stood or sat near you.  A fair proportion of women will likely ignore a man if he did try to interact – either by walking quickly away in the street or pretending she can’t hear or see you in vain attempt to hide behind the headphones she is wearing – but some women will interchange in conversation, such is the greater urge of some male attention.

When she does (kindly!) stop still or take her headphones off for a minute or two, it will be no coincidence if she starts to talk a lot about herself.  In the immediate interaction, this is a good thing (as opposed to a woman just giving abbreviated answers) because it will ease the pressure on you to produce ceaseless topics to talk about.  The chances are she will ask you next to nothing about yourself, but don’t let this dissuade you early on.

In this period of responding to your questions, the strong likelihood is that her answers will derive in a form of presenting how exciting, popular, positive, busy, dramatic, and fast-paced her rollercoaster life is.  Most men (including my former self) can often be a little disheartened when this occurs, as they will believe she has very little time for him should they be a couple, but with experience you will soon start to realize that this exaggeration does not align with the reality. 

Q-tip 1:

An easy formula to use when assessing an exaggerating woman is this:

A woman’s verbal execution, divided by 2.5 = The actuality

This formula can be used in both the positive and negative language she uses, by and large.

And this over expressing of her lifestyle can be an education to abide by when dating or in a relationship with her too.  The big advantage you have when past the interaction base is that you can now see the misalignment with your own two eyes, as opposed to reading between the lines of what she is telling you.

How does a man deal with it all?

Ultimately, the only way to ever be relaxed with this female extreme behaviour is to be the cool, calm and collected cucumber around her.  When she is down, listen to her, but know that nine times out of ten she will not be as depressed as she makes out.  As the statistics back up, more women threaten to commit suicide, but more men go through with committing suicide.  I think this tells its own story…

On the other hand, whether it be in the immediate or post interaction, fathom that her overstated life preoccupations are not what she verbalizes.  Much of the time she is telling you how occupied, rapid and sought-after she is will, but in practice, it will be less than half the amount she claims.  Much of this time will be spent watching TV on her own.

A final thought

With all this said, if a woman is using made-up excuses to not see you due to the bullshit reasons as explained above, the facts of the matter are it is one of two things:

1)    She is testing you in the early stages to see first how clingy and needy you are, and second, how much you have going on in your life too.

2)    If she does this on more than two occasions (and two occasions is the allowance as an absolute maximum - if nothing but to cut her some slack if she is, in the unlikely event, telling the truth), make no more contact with her other than respond if she messages you.  The strong likelihood is she is not serious about taking things further.

Q-tip 2:

When a woman genuinely needs you, listen to her, and give constructive, honest and compassionate thoughts to her situation.  When she claims she is so busy and popular, treat it as water off a duck’s back, in addition to playing fire with fire in discretely showing you are equally up to your neck in it in this respect.  A woman is more attracted to a man when fighting for his time, and her heart is repelled when comprehensive to him striving for her time.

Thursday, 24 March 2022

Women with excessive tattoos

 

“Better no contact than contact with no substance.”

  

A few years ago, I approached a really attractive blonde in a bar.  Whilst she was very engaging, friendly, and apparently happy that I did interact with her, she did say she had a boyfriend when I unapologetically asked early in the conversation.

I sensed, with no proof (but which would become more apparent in the future), that she was a little disappointed about having a boyfriend and not pursuing with me.  A few weeks later I saw her with her boyfriend and his mates, and whilst by no means a bad looking guy at all, I saw her looking over at me shortly before making no excuse to come and talk.

About a year later, she had physically aged terribly.  I’d hedge a bet that when we met, she was about 27, but a mere year later she looked in her mid-thirties.  In the whole scheme of things (hence versus the female competition) she was still one of the more attractive women out there having stayed in prime physical shape, but the late nights, drugs, and craving to do the things to stay locally popular had taken its toll on her skin and eyes.

The stupid sleeve tattoo

Another year on, and I saw her in a club during a night out in another city.  She was all over the place, falling over on the dance floor as she made efforts to make the exit.  It was a pitiful downfall of a once beautiful – both on the inside and outside – woman.  How the mighty had fallen, was what came to mind.

A few weeks later, I saw her in the same venue.  She was with two men who, I believe just based on experience of these dynamics, were nothing more than blue balls followers.  It was almost embarrassing as I caught her just looking at me for seconds on end, from no more than a couple of yards away, as they both stood next to her.  I avoided any sustained eye contact with her.

Looking rough still in relativity to when I first met her two years earlier, it was hard to ignore the full arm sleeve tattoo she was exploiting.  As someone who prefers naturally beautiful and feminine women, the female compartment who go for fake tits, enhanced lips, inundated sunbed time, and overuse of makeup, is not to my liking.  It will come as no surprise then to know I’m not a fan at all of women sporting excessive tattoos.

These women do have their place though…

Nevertheless, I’m not going to be a complete hypocrite.  For shorter term benefits, generally, I have been involved with isolated women who resembled the perennial woman as explained above.  I’ve never slept with a woman with excessive tattoos, and most certainly not one with a sleeve imprint, but if the truth be told I’m quite partial to women with tattoos on their ankle, foot, upper thigh, or lower back.  One of the best girlfriends I have experienced – both in physical attractiveness and all-round girlfriend material terms – possessed a large thigh tattoo.  I expect, with a proficient level of experience and objectivity, that she is an exception rather than the rule.

Did I mention girlfriend material?  Albeit this article based on an Australian study was written over a decade ago, I think it sums up the tattoo scenario perfectly:

Results: A total of 14.5% of respondents had ever been tattooed, and 2.4% of respondents had been tattooed in the year before the interview. Men were more likely than women to report a tattoo, but the highest rates of tattooing were found among women in their 20s (29.4%). Men and women ages 20-39 were most likely to have been tattooed, as were men with lower levels of education, tradesmen, and women with live-out partners. Tattooing was also associated with risk-taking behaviours, including smoking, greater numbers of lifetime sexual partners, cannabis use (women only) and ever having depression (men only).

Conclusions: Tattooing has increased in popularity during the past decade. Yet tattoos still appear to be a marker for risk-taking behavior in adults.

The area I have highlighted pretty much sums up the kinds of men and women who have tattoos – the lower classes.  This isn’t absolute, but it paints the greater part of the portrait.

For elaborated summary, I bullet point the kinds of women most likely to sport an excessive array of tattoos, and tattoos that are seen on the most prominent ill-advised (arms, neck, chest, upper back) body parts:

·       Lower class women

·       Drama hunting women

·       Less intelligent women

·       Less educated women

·       Attention-seeking women

·       Women not interested in a career

·       Less feminine women

·       Women who hold a powerful desire for bad boys

·       Women who attain a need to be popular and part of a social proof group

·       Women who have truly little going on in their lives, outside of fabricated drama

Once more, I must stress this exemplifies the majority of women, but not all.  The woman at the centre of this post, in addition to the past girlfriend I reference, were the opposite of all the above with the exception of their attention-seeking occasions and desire for bad boys (which, if honest, is an innate composition of nearly all women).

A final thought

It cannot go without pointing out from the findings that the highest rates of tattooing were found among women in their 20s - which accounted for 29.4% of all women and men.  This again should not arrive as any astonishment at all from a female age context, as naturally women in this age range are at their pinnacle in respect to seeking and desiring public attention onto them.  It’s also the age (although I would argue this needs to be 20 to 25) where women can get away with making decisions that goes against most men’s desirables, because a woman’s youth and beauty at this age is a greater compensator to overcome this male distaste.

What is maybe a little more surprising to me, based on nothing more than anecdotal observation, is that a higher percentage of women in their 20s have tattoos than likewise men in their 20s.  Even in this day and age, where women have become more masculine and men have become more feminine over the last couple of decades, I wouldn’t have expected the female number to pass the male quantity.

Then again, when I think further, it perhaps does fathom more.  First, I would expect that the vast majority of this 29.4% of women only have one or two small tattoos, and similarly only in discrete areas of the body.  Second, bearing in mind that >80% of men are perennial beta male nice guys, the vast majority of these men will not own any ink on their skin. 

If the truth be told, in my opinion any average-looking man with a mediocre (or worse) body profile is better off having no tattoos.  The only argument against this would be that, such is his none appeal and low sought-after status with women worth having, a tattoo or two could bring some female eyes onto him.

A final, final thought

This all begs the question therefore – why do women have excessive tattoos, if an extraordinary proportion of men do not desire them? 

·       Women are so into their own lives that they do not stop to think what men want.  Or more to the point, these women do not care what men think.

·       Women are more interested in the short term (especially when younger) thrill of standing out from the female crowd, than the down the line consequence decisions like this can have on the numbers of men who will commit to them.

·       As alluded to above, so many men are low in demand beta males that there will always be a man somewhere out there who will take oversight to a woman choosing to advise a tattoo parlour to ink all over her.

·       A lot of women attain false psychological female projection.  In other words, they hold a misconception (or sometimes ignorance of reality) in their minds that what they find attractive in a man is what men find attractive in women.  Tattoos are classic examples.  Women are sexually turned on by men with tattoos, but men either prefer women with no tattoos or tattoos that can only to be seen by him when she is naked.

Q-tip:

Nearly all women are more sexually turned on by a man with a tattoo in comparison to a man without a tattoo.  Most of these women would also happily be in a relationship with the same man, although the amount of ink on his body will prove to be a factor dependant on the social class of the woman.  On the other hand, a substantial proportion of men are sexually turned off by a woman with too many tattoos, and slightly more turned on or simply neutral about women with only discrete tattoos.  There are very few men who are less turned on by a woman without any tattoos, all else being equal.  Finally, and most importantly, men prefer to be in relationships with women who have not a tattoo to be seen on their skin.

 

Acknowledgements

PubMed.gov