“Tomorrow belongs to those who can hear
it coming.”
(David Bowie)
When you see
this below picture, what do you think?
The obvious
answer, a topic that perhaps can be seen as somewhat dominated by this blog, is
a considerably more physically attractive woman than her respective male partner. She’s an 8.25/10, and he’s a 6.5/10. Whilst this >25% gap between the two is
larger than what is usually seen (most women go for men who are 10% to 15% lesser
looking), it’s by no means a fall off your seat moment for people who observe
in the real world. You will see many
women of >8/10 with 6.5/10 men in the physical looks department.
Of course the common phrase used to sum up these relationship comparisons is: "He's boxing (punching) above his weight." This has become an almost enjoyable phrase to use by most people - distributors and recipients of the comment alike. The female recipient likes to hear this because it enlarges her head and basically spells out that he needs to be grateful to be blessed with her all so valuable presence and existence. The male side also emotes fondly to the words, because this is symbolic (at least this is what he naively thinks) that his non-visual attributes are what scores him a better looking girlfriend.
The problem is, this phrase is born out of artificial happiness which can, and usually does, have detrimental implications further down the line. A woman dating a lesser looking man is by and large a case of making herself feel better about life, whilst the man is very rarely aware of this being the main motive on her part. Don't get me wrong, this none organic way to get together can work if a man is aware of the circumstance and plays his strategy in accordance - flipping the script in convincing her she is the one who should be grateful to be with him - but only a tiny percentage of men are that clued up.
Of course the common phrase used to sum up these relationship comparisons is: "He's boxing (punching) above his weight." This has become an almost enjoyable phrase to use by most people - distributors and recipients of the comment alike. The female recipient likes to hear this because it enlarges her head and basically spells out that he needs to be grateful to be blessed with her all so valuable presence and existence. The male side also emotes fondly to the words, because this is symbolic (at least this is what he naively thinks) that his non-visual attributes are what scores him a better looking girlfriend.
The problem is, this phrase is born out of artificial happiness which can, and usually does, have detrimental implications further down the line. A woman dating a lesser looking man is by and large a case of making herself feel better about life, whilst the man is very rarely aware of this being the main motive on her part. Don't get me wrong, this none organic way to get together can work if a man is aware of the circumstance and plays his strategy in accordance - flipping the script in convincing her she is the one who should be grateful to be with him - but only a tiny percentage of men are that clued up.
A story
A few years
ago, long back when you could visit another country without contemplating quarantine
procedures to enforce you not to go in the first place, I sat by the poolside
during a vacation in northern Italy. I was
minding my own business, eyes shut and high into the sky, when a couple sat
nearby and started talking in German (or a dialect of the German language). I speak and understand reasonable German, but
most certainly not to the level of comprehending what they were saying. It mattered little anyway.
For my curiosity
and interest in heterosexual couple dynamics, I discretely looked to my left
hand side (for clarity, they are not the couple in the photograph!). What immediately stood out to me, and if the
truth be told moved me negatively, was how darker skinned she was than
him. They were both of Caucasian ethnicity,
yet she was as tanned as a white woman I’ve ever seen and with dark hair, and
he was as pale as could be with ginger/auburn locks. It just looked weird.
The usual
course of events
Putting
sexual inclinations and satisfying their hearts as a priority to one side for now
(and let’s be fair, most modern day women put their egos and motives to feel
better about life ahead of both the aforementioned), this is what women ideally
desire in a man as their male partner. The
list is not exhaustive:
·
A
man who is taller than her
·
A
man who is facially less gifted and stand out than her
·
A
man who, in gender relative terms, does not have a better body profile than her
·
A
man who has higher social status than her
·
A man
who is smarter than her
·
A
man who attains a higher job profession status than her
·
A
man who earns more money than her
·
A
man who possesses more money/assets than her
·
A
man who has darker hair than her (or at least as dark)
·
A
man who is darker skinned than her
Based on the
fact which both science and real-life observation proves, when a man and a woman
are of the same ethnicity, the male face and body is of darker complexion than
the female equivalent. With this base
skin colour laid as the foundation, the man will tan quicker and go darker than
the woman further still with spells in the sunshine of parity.
So when you
see images as illustrated in the above image and as explained on the Genoese
poolside, you end up scratching your head even more than usual. Personally, I find it a strange, weak and
even repulsive viewing when a woman is significantly more tanned than her boyfriend. It just doesn’t sit right.
I’d even say
that an Indian or African origin (to mention only two darker skinned ethnicity
groups) woman alongside a white man gives off a much better dynamic. With this, you are born with what you
are. Maybe the white man has a thing for
women of this race, and vice versa. They
will also be churning out a cute mixed-race kid too, or at least with a higher
probability if you go by the law of average.
But a white
woman far darker than a white man? No, I’m
not having that without deeper analysis.
The
reason?
The obvious
reason is a compounded female ego that stretches beyond even the norm. Not only does she want to be more eye
catching than him in visual terms, but she also holds a greater motivation to push
this gap even further apart with a better tan.
What's even more bewildering is if women listened to men, they would actually know that there is sweet spot for how attractive men assess women's tans. A bit like makeup/ and foundation, a little to medium amount makes her look more attractive, yet beyond that and it is counter-productive.
What's even more bewildering is if women listened to men, they would actually know that there is sweet spot for how attractive men assess women's tans. A bit like makeup/ and foundation, a little to medium amount makes her look more attractive, yet beyond that and it is counter-productive.
But not many women (outside of very savvy women) give a shit to what men desire, as long as they are out-doing their female peers. Long live
the female ego, and it isn’t going anywhere south in your surroundings any time
soon. If anything, it is only venturing
in one direction. That direction is not
one I’m looking forward to.
Hair colour
differences between men and women
I recall
meeting a German woman on a beach in Athens (Piraeus to be precise) a few years
ago. We hit it off for a day or two, but
we never stayed in touch. She was cute
(not hot), with a nice curvy figure, long dark brown hair, 5ft 3” tall, and
white skin with just an obvious but not over-emphasized end of summer tan.
As we got
the train back to the city, she leaned against my shoulder and commented on a
blonde-haired guy a few metres away. He
had that surfer look, tall, not bad looking at all to be fair, and he was also
German. She whispered to me that she
just didn’t find blonde haired men attractive at all. Her words seemed genuine. I replied in a light-hearted way along the
lines of life just not being fair – stating that from my experience most blonde-haired
women want darker haired men, and yet dark-haired women also prefer a man of
darker shade.
And I can’t
think of too many cases over the last few years where I have seen a woman with
a lighter haired man. As a percentage,
it has to be very low. Once more, if you
do see it there is a strong chance the woman is self-attention and ego driven,
although not in the same manner as a woman wanting to be darker skinned than
her male partner - when both are of ethnicity equivalence.
Q-tip:
Notice
what else is a negative dynamic in the photograph. He looks way, way happier to be there than
her. This is the exact opposite image a
man should look for. She should be the
one smiling like a Cheshire Cat – even if in disingenuous manner and just for
the cameras – and he should be the one sporting a mild to indifferent smirk expression. You may think, and women will tell you, that women
love to see their man express happiness in being around her. But a woman will always try harder for a man when
she questions his happiness, and she will try less to please a man when she has him in
the palm of her hand.