“A love is for life, and
not just for Christmas.”
As I’m such
a great guy and in a good mood due to the festive season that is now in full
flow, I’m going to throw out some rules of thumb in the sexual market that
should now be rising to the surface of many consistent readers minds. These stocking fillers will throw out any
wasted time you may spend during the holiday season and beyond, in trying to
impress the one you have vainly had your eye on for the last 12 months. I hate to be a dampener in this season to be
jolly, but call me the loving Scrooge who is saving you mistletoe money and an
aching heart, if you will.
Nice Guy Good
Guy Jerk
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Santa
Nice Guy or Rudolph Jerk?
If the woman
you are hitting on is the standard 10% to 15% hotter than you – as you will see
in most heterosexual relationships under the female age of 35 - lean towards
being a jerk. On a general scale of 1 to
10 in ascending jerkiness when the circumstance is “man meets hotter woman”,
aim for 6 to 7 in the early stages. The
hotter the woman, or the bigger the visual gap in her favour, the more of a
jerk you will need to be.
If you’re
hitting on a woman who is not as hot as you, then why the hell are you? Seriously though, on the assumption that you
are keen on her for other mitigating reasons, the pitch should be nearer
5. One day you should be a nice guy,
followed by at least one day of jerkiness.
When the physical blessings are roughly a match, the same process
applies with the variant of starting at 6 as opposed to 5.
If you’re a
good looking guy with a similar impressive looking woman in gender relativity,
the pitch should be 6. If she is slightly
hotter than you, adjust to 7. If she is
cute but not hot, adjust to 5 ½. Unlike
average and ugly looking men, who have to keep a woman challenged from the
first moment, a good looking man already captures the female eyes and an
element of her uncertainty. This automated
assumption by women (especially women that don’t know the man personally) that
he is a player or a jerk means he needs to show more vulnerability,
attainability and proof of being a loyal boyfriend. However, don’t lean too far to the nice guy
side. Good looks for men are not as
valuable as an attitude that keeps a woman on her toes.
If a woman
tells you she always falls for bad boys, realize this is through subconscious
choice and not misfortune. It’s never a
bad time to remember that there are 6 nice guys for every 1 jerk, so a woman
wouldn’t pick the 1 black ball in the bag over the 6 red balls every time. With this in mind, comprehension of her
holding predilections for jerks due to her innate character is imperative. It would be easy for a nice guy to believe he
is the one who can save her, but rest assured he will be the one to lose her by
being too nice. With a woman of this
kind, a man should lean towards 8 to 9.
Only when he is confident she deserves, and requires, an element of
romance should he tame the apathy down a level or two.
If a woman
is the typical sweet, innocent and “butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth” type –
as most girls come across and convince people they are – don’t let this cloud
your objectivity. Most women will always
put their own welfare first, and if a better male option came along they would
leave without a tear in their eye. Most
often, this departure is down to men acting too nice rather than too much of a
jerk. Women will tell you the opposite,
but this is only to hold down their integrity.
With very little else to go on, pitch early on at 4 or 7. Astute character judgement is necessary when
contemplating the low end or high side. If
pitching at 4, this is risky because some women may lose rapid interest through
concerns of a man being too nice. But in
most cases her ego boost that immediately emotes will give you this
leeway. Ensure you gradually move to 5
or 6 (from 4) in the scale sooner rather than later. If pitching at 7 – hence more of a jerk –
this is less risk orientated in the early stages due to confirmation you are
not a supplicated guy and you have other things going on in your life. If it’s clearly working well, stay at 7 but
throw in isolated nice guy days. If you
feel you’re losing her due to her thoughts of your lack of interest, throw in
an act of 3 or 4 before moving back to 7.
If in doubt, always start at 7 rather than 4.
If the woman
has an incredibly big ego and high self-opinion, don’t even think of pitching
on the lower side of 7. This is all the
more pertinent if she is very physically attractive. You may as well not even go there in the
first place unless you hold desires for failure in the first week. Women who are graced with huge egos are only
there because they are surrounded by nice guys, uglier female friends and
passive parents who have allowed them to feel like they deserve to wear a crown
on the ever growing head. These women
may like this, but they don’t respect it.
Fundamentally, a starting ground pitch of 8 is required. Any higher, and the roll of the dice is that
her pride rules over her needs. In other
words, the ego inside talks louder than the respect she has for someone not
idolizing her, and she may just move on before you can even take it any
further. But if lower than 8 she may
simply tar you with the same brush as the growing flock of nice guys. A woman of this nature needs an immediate
kick up the backside to realization of her true place in the world. Only throw in gratitude days of affection,
time and money when she has given reason for her to deserve it.
If the woman
is cute but clearly insecure, natural nice guys are tailor made for this female
compartment. Although the majority of
these women will still have instinctive and sexual thoughts for more edgy men
who are high in demand and low in commitment, most women in this bracket will
convince their mind that the only types of men they need are excessive nice
guys. These women are rarely seen on
girl’s nights out, so they haven’t been as exposed to bad boys as much as their
more daring and attention seeking female peers.
A cuddly night in with her unwanted boyfriend beats all this. At least, this is what she tells
herself. A nice guy can pitch at 1 or 2
and still get away with it. She may
become bored, but her faithfulness and loyalty is usually the reward.
The
snap-shot explanations show a relative trend, and this should never be far from
the mind of a man when in interaction with his girlfriend or female
target:
Too much of
an extreme (1 to 2 or 9 to 10) is rarely going to be beneficial. Excluding the magnified insecure woman, if
only one extreme pitch could be taken then it should be to the jerk biased
side. The law of minimum effort for maximum results should be stamped on a naïve
man’s forehead.
Generally
speaking, the hotter the girl, the more inclined she is to go for jerks. This also applies for many cute girls who
think they are hot. This trend will show
a gradual shift to the left as she gets older (in particular post 23), but her
mindset will move slower than her physical decline. Simply put, if a woman was once very hot and
often found with the biggest jerks, she will refuse to change her ways before
accepting jerks no longer want her. Further
put, she will refuse to believe men no longer find her attractive even if they
have stopped looking at her. So in the
younger years – when she is hot – an extreme jerk with high social status is
the ideal match. As she gets older, men
can (even if they shouldn’t) get away with a more even scaled approach. Wealthy nice guys will frequently be found
with this once but declining hot woman post her 23rd birthday, and
more often still as her 25 year landmark approaches, but it tends to be a
relationship based on her terms and his gratitude.
Nevertheless,
for the general process the message should be clear. You wouldn’t train your body at the gym with
the same exercises with the same intensity every time if you held desires for
lasting improvements. You wouldn’t stay
in the same role of the exact same job at a lifelong company if career
progression was your goal. You wouldn’t
eat the same meals each and every evening if the fulfillment of variation
brought about different enjoyments. And
you wouldn’t go to the same holiday destination during the block-booked 2 weeks
of every year if experiences and memories are what motivate you to get out of
bed in the morning.
Women are no
different. If a man acts with the same
demeanour all the time she will soon find herself living in a mundane
world. As women aren’t very proactive in
changing up their lives, they expect a man to do it for them. As much as women will say they hold ambitions
to find a really nice guy, this is their egos talking rather than their
hearts. Similarly, women may like the
thrill of a jerk’s unpredictable and care-free traits, but eventually they look
for someone more responsible.
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