Monday 20 May 2024

The main reason men lie about age


“The only thing all of us have in common is the fact we are getting older.” 


In spite of many people (more women than men) thinking they are whiter than white and immune to any wrongdoing; the fact is that none of us are selfless all the time.  This is all the more applicable when we have something to gain.

My take on this is simple.  You should be as honest as much as possible, as a mindset and delivery that proceeds with the truth and reality gives off a much healthier and stress free existence.  Should this be true, it is kind of a given that you will enjoy life more.

With this said, if I was to pinpoint my most frequent occasions of lying, the vast majority will consist of age related answers.  I would tend to think that a high percentage of men post thirty, who have a liking for younger women as well as women their own age, will have also lied in this regard too.

Why do men lie about their age?

There are a few reasons behind this.  Whilst this answer is predominantly based on my own experience, I believe other men may have followed some or all of these trends:

·       As in my case, some men will look considerably younger than what the birth certificate shows.  At 31, I was being told I looked anything between 21 and 24.  With this in mind, if I did not know someone personally or it was just a case of a quick conversation, it was easier to agree than tell the truth.

·       Whilst men do physically age better and slower than women, the fact still remains that most men look their chronological age, or even a bit older.  As much as this is a minor reason, I have lied about my age to these exampled men in order to not make them feel less about themselves.

·       When a boy is the age of 16, he cannot wait for the next two years to pass quickly in desiring to be 18.  When he reaches 18, he may be in just as much a hurry to reach 21.  Nevertheless, from 21, I place a firm estimate that >90% of men actually want time to slow down, and once they reach their mid-20’s, they wish they were younger.  This desire of being younger in number terms (not maturity, professional, monetary terms etc) only exacerbates for every new age decade he approaches.

·       There are times when it benefits your professional or social acquaintances to believe you are younger than you are.  For example, I work in schools where the students are aged between 11 to 16.  It is obvious that they will like me and be able to relate to me more, the younger they think I am.  With this considered, me lying about my age is selfless, as much as selfish.

But the most main reason is….?

Not to put too fine a point on it, the main reason men, in particular men post 30 years of age, lie about their age is to date, or perhaps with the intention to just sleep with, younger women.  I doubt many men actually get a buzz out of lying per se in terms of age revelation, but they will look at what they have to gain.

I recall between 30 to 33 when I just found it easy to attract women between 18 to 23.  Without firm proof, much of this circumstance was because they knew I was older than them, but not by the actual years.  They would have thought I was between 21 and 25 (some said this, others would have assumed), depending on the woman’s eyes (and perhaps agenda to what she wanted to believe).

How did the women respond?

When I look back, I only lied to one of them.  I was 31 at the time, but she thought I was 21 (albeit in a dark nightclub the first time we met).  She was only 18 at the time, but she looked at least 21.  I told her I was 24.  She was more than happy with this.

After a couple of months, and after we revealed our mutual love for each other, my conscience got the better of me.  When I told her I was 31, she did not come across in immediate shock.  I tend to think she had done some online digging on me anyway, but she did not fully believe it was me. 

After a little chuckle to herself, she just crept closer and kissed me.  It was one of the most relieved feelings I have experienced, in the main because I had fallen in love with her, and also because she was a good person.  Had it been just a one night stand or short term fling, truly little contrition would have taken part.

This leads me onto why I have often lied about my age to younger women who appeared interested.  In the case of the girlfriend referenced above, reading between the lines, I predict that had she known about my age from the start, she may have not pursued.  The fact I did lie allowed things to develop, and our experience and relationship – in spite of the age gap – was left to blossom.  In other words, had I not lied she may not have had this experience in her life.  Had I not lied, she would not have experienced such happiness.

The same applies for less committal types of women.  A lot of women only hold inclinations for my presence in their life during certain periods, therefore once more, it is a fair assumption on my part that had I told them my real age, they would not have got what they wanted.  Call me selfless or selfish, it is up to you…

Case in point anecdote…

Fast forward a few years, and I got to know a young woman near to where I resided.  She lived with her parents, and I though she looked 23 or 24.  We texted for a few days, and we agreed to meet up one Saturday.

Prior to the event, she asked me how old I was.  Telling her the truth in that I was post 35, she revealed she was to become 21 in the next few days.  After a bit more dialogue, she said it just did not feel right due to the age gap.  We never met up.

A couple of months on, and I received a text from her claiming that she found a key on my drive.  I had lost no key whatsoever, and I would put my mortgage on there being no key in this fabricated story.  In essence, she most likely wanted to meet up in her most fertile few days. 

As it turns out, unfortunately, I was going on a vacation early the next morning.  Nothing came of our little endeavours, and we never set eyes on each other again.  For what it is worth, about a year later I saw her carrying a baby.  Lucky escape…!?

Do women lie about their age?

Whilst women will lie and time waste at will and with no remorse generally, especially with respect to emotional topics or relationship/interaction with the opposite sex, women lie in far smaller numbers in comparison to men about their age.  This is kind of ironic, because getting older is a harsher reality and outcome for women than it is for men.

So, whilst women most likely despise and resent getting older more than men, their inclination to lie is not as great because their predilection for being romantically and/or sexually involved with younger men is not near as high - in neither numbers nor motivation - than the inverse gender dynamic. 

What women compensate in replacement of lying about their age, however, is to act in an immature manner.  This is why, in the modern day, you see women in their mid-20’s acting like 18 year olds, women in their 30’s acting like they are 21 again, and some women in their 40’s or 50’s who are pitifully giggling or tapping on phones like females decades their junior.

A final thought

If you were to read an online topic and comments section, you will not find a more ferocious female vocal audience than one which manifests the subject of a man lying about his age.  As always, this is more down to women’s (most likely older women) fear of said man being attracted to and sometimes securing younger women, than it is about him lying about his age per se.

In fact, you would almost think that a man lying about his age and being interested/sleeping with much younger women is, to many older women, a worst crime than him cheating on a woman his own age.  Some jealous men (ironically men who have cheated on wives in the past) also think this way too.  I guess a lot of people live in glass houses….

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