Tuesday 17 August 2021

Do women really chase men?


“When there’s nothing clever to do, the temptation is trying to be clever.” 


As an immediate disclaimer, I am not the creator of the link to be shown or the beneficiary of any subscription.  I came across it by no more than chance when it was an advert shown prior to searching for a music video.  My instincts were to take a nosy at it. 

Depending on your software formats, this link may be available on audio, or it may alternatively only be viewed in text.  I listened to the audio version, although at times I started to lose interest when, in my opinion, it slowly moved from productive advice and realisms onto a little far-fetched reality.  

Nevertheless, it does point out some critical factors that manifest in women finding a man more attractive.  Every single factor will have been covered in this blog on more than one occasion, however for the purpose of amalgamation and time I will bullet point what the creator views as the reasons: 

1)    Social proof / status

2)    Pre-selection (mainly by other women’s attraction, but also by other male attention)

3)    Female jealousy

4)    Female competition

5)    Male self-entitlement

6)    Male options with many women

I’m not going to elaborate on each reason, simply because by now it should be self-explanatory.  You can also screen through my archives for dedicated posts.  The trend is clear though. Women are far more sexually attracted to a man when they have to fight to win his love. 


Women, by and large, will tell you the opposite to how they feel and how they want to act out in the face of male appeal.  What a woman will tell you is she loves a man who does everything for her, who lays down the red carpet for her, who makes her feel like a princess, and who shows how happy and privileged he is to be with her.  What she truly desires is the opposite to all this, within feasible reason.  What she truly craves for is to never have a man in the palm of her hands, and especially without a fight to earn this.

Key points to the story

As I alluded to above, the more believable content was at the top-heavy section.  The creator confesses how he is a short, mediocre looking man with no stand-out non-visual desirables.  This would most likely make him a bit below average in overall male sought-after standards.  By no means should men of this level give up on ever finding a decent looking woman, but only a minority will strike to secure a cute, or even hot, woman.  This is in spite of most women wanting to be with lesser looking men, but there is only so far most women will drop down in both male physical attractiveness and overall male appeal levels.

He states that numerous women declined his advances or never took it to the next level despite his unequivocal niceness.  There won’t be many honest men out there who haven’t fallen flat on their faces in this, what once seemed, illogical course of events.  Most young men, or men of any age without a level of experience with women, will believe in the logics that the nicer and more giving you are to a woman, the more you will get in return.  With time, experience and know-how, you realize the inverse is far more common.  This is all the more applicable in terms of the more physically attractive the woman is.

The turn of fortune event

He narrates that the big light bulb moment in acknowledging what attracts women the most, in particular if you are not a good-looking man, is social proof.  Women started to become intrigued in his existence when other men had written various stuff on his t-shirt and were congregating around him in making him the centre of attention.  Whilst the jury is still out on me being convinced that the most attractive women will swarm around an average looking man who other men are effectively ridiculing, I will concede there is some substance to this.  A woman holds strong inclinations to be popular and be part of a big “in-crowd”, and if a man is creating an audience for himself, she may uncontrollably start to footstep nearer and nearer.  I guess it is like a fat male comedian making an audience of thousands laugh.  A woman will be more attracted to that fat comedian man in comparison to if he was just said fat man walking past her invisible thoughts.

So, if the above paragraph summarises point 1, points 2, 3 and 4 are by-products from this.  The social proof (point 1) from other men brought other women towards him (point 2), and this naturally manufactured further female competition and female jealousy to win his attention away from other women (points 4 and 3 respectively).

The next stage

Perhaps this is the point when I start to call a little bullshit on his self-proclaimed accomplishments.  I get the point that the incident gave him the tap on the head moment to accept what women are attracted to, and he is right in so far that the more women simultaneously entering a man’s life, the more self-entitlement and options with women this will forge (points 5 and 6 from above), however I don't think that just one moment of night success could instantaneously construct a plethora of attractive women (granted, we don’t know if they were attractive or just easy lay less attractive women?) falling by his knees.  An average looking short man will still need a bit more to his armoury than this.

This is where I think the substance of truth in what women desire is his attempt for monetary capitalization.  In other words, I think he has worked out what women want, but he misses out on a lot of pieces to the overall jigsaw.  Of course, I haven’t bought the subscription, therefore I can only go by the audio and text synopsis. 

Caveats to the truth behind women chasing men

In essence, the fundamentals behind what he documents are accurate.  Women are attracted to male popularity and pre-selection, and they are turned on by fighting with other women for his exclusive (and sometimes unexclusive) love.  Be that as it may, it is important to map out some caveats to all this:

·       All else equal, a woman will chase men the most who are 10% to 15% less physically attractive than her own grade.  Below or above this range and the chasing threshold has diminishing returns (to the point where it has no returns if too far below or above this range).

·       Women will usually need proof and knowledge of other women pre-selecting a man in order to chase him.  Sometimes verbal recognition, even if proof is absent, will be enough.

·       All else equal, women ranging from 6.75/10 to 7.5/10 in physical attractiveness will do more chasing than any other section of women.  Women below this range will do less because most men worth chasing are out of their league.  Women above this range will perform less proactive moves because they, by vast majority, hold a mindset that men should chase them.

·       A non-famous good-looking (and in particular a very good-looking, hence 8.5/10 or greater) man will receive fewer female suitors than his above average-looking male counterpart.  This may seem unreasoned, however women are generally more at ease chasing, and being alongside, men of lesser comparative physical aesthetics. 

·       A non-famous good-looking man is far more likely to receive female chasing from a 7/10 (or lower) woman than an 8/10 (or higher) woman.  Once more, this may appear groundless, but the easy explanation is because said 7/10 woman fears rejection less than said 8/10 woman.

·       Famous above-average to good-looking men will only be chased by hot women.

·       Famous but average to below-average looking men will be chased by both hot and cute women.

A final thought

It has to be clarified that female chasing of men (in social environments) is barely at a ratio of 1:20 in relation to male chasing of women.  Sounds obvious, but necessary to spell out.  In the virtual world (hence dating websites), this ratio would be lower than 1:20 (closer to 1:10), however as harsh as this sounds, nearly all this female chasing will be via desperate, lonely and undesirable women on the singles market.

In final conclusion, it also has to be pointed out that, even in today’s faster moving and “never in one place for long” world, most couples you see together are not from the fabrication of a scenario where unknown man sees unknown woman, he advances towards her (hence chases her), and the rest is history as they live happily ever after.  The large majority of couples, irrespective to what surveys may contrive to convince you otherwise, are formed from an existing social network that is usually either through friendship or working links.  In other words, the man didn’t need to do much chasing in the conventional process because he already knew her in the first place.


Link shown above


  1. Based on my personal experience, I noticed that women who are 6's and above don't want to deal with a guy who is just as or better looking than them. I think that they go for rough masculine looking men over pretty boys because they want a man that will make them feel feminine and girly.

    1. I'd go one step further and a lot of women in this category will also be seen with (and sometimes even put themselves in a position to be chased by him) more feminine or neutral looking men. A lot to do with this is because there are far more neutral sexuality looking men than masculine men. But yes, the vast majority of women will prefer to be with a rough/rugged looking man over the pretty boy look.

  2. Have you seen todd v pua video

    1. I'll take a look soon and give a full response mate.