The rule of thumb for female projected attraction onto men goes through this process:
At a young age, most women desire the popular bad boy. These men are usually more physically attractive than the average male level, but they are rarely from the best looking 5%. The reason for this prevalence is that, at a young age, the female mind is at its peak in terms of required challenge, unpredictability, intensity, drama, and a need to be the one chasing a sexual target.
As women get older – post 23 years of age - their preferential emphasis in seeking potential male mates takes an imperceptible change of direction. Although they still have visceral feelings for the bad boy types – because the female mind doesn’t simply switch off from these feelings that draw them towards these men – a conscious awareness has been established to confirm that most of these men, for a number of reasons, are not inclined to settle down, be reliable, or take on the role as a responsible provider. As women at this age are now forming priorities for reliability over instinctive emotional connections (even though the ideal scenario is to find a man who ticks both boxes), they will substitute, to an extent, the bad boy with a nice guy. Nice guys generally fall into the beta male category, and the vast majority are average in aesthetic terms.
Another consideration to female selectivity is the age at when women’s sexual market value starts to decline. Exceptions will always take issue with the reality, but rarely do regular women become more visually impressive beyond 25 years of age. They will subconsciously be aware of this apparent perpetuation of their pinnacle look, and this realization forces them to reinforce in their belief that the highest calibre men are those of higher status - but not the highest in physical attractiveness. Basically, they now doubt they are on a level playing field with better looking men, so they drive force to other desired metrics, even if they are not convinced of this transition in their own mind. This recognition of sexual obsolescence, even if in plausible deniability, draws them to lesser looking men who they would perceive to have a heightened appreciation of their existence. In addition to all this, a large amount of women above 25 years of age formulate a mental state of trust, insecurity and egoism issues that are negative in taking into account being in a relationship with a good looking man. With all this in mind, a suitable choice would appear to be a high earning, high status, commitment willing, but average looking man.
Although this is the normal course of events in the path a woman takes in emotional decisions, it isn’t always a route that will conclude to a happy ending. Whilst the bad boy dilemmas in the early days will sustain heartache, sleepless nights and stress, this dynamic does fall in line with how a woman views a high value male. When women hunt down a man, the brain is informing her that he is of high quality. Once she is knowledgeable a man is proceeding in all the constant sycophancy and tracking, an element of what she feels the need to do in being validated by him is taken away. Men will almost always need to make the first move – as very few women are proactive and open to possible rejection – but a re-frame of this hunting strategy needs to be in a way that involves a woman requiring a man that little bit more than the inverse. With women making conceivable safer and more secure options in being with men who very few (or no) women are magnetized to, this bond is always susceptible to boredom, predictability and irritation on their parts.
The majority of men make the big mistake in thinking the way to a woman’s heart and sexual impulses is through constant flattery. As most men fall into the “average” bracket – average in physique, facial features, status and personality – and as female cosmetics allow a transformation to look more attractive than they naturally are, it is no surprise that many men find themselves alongside a woman as, or fractionally more, physically attractive than they are. There are also pronounced numbers of women significantly more pleasing on the eyes than the male counterpart they walk alongside.
Nevertheless, these real life observational dynamics can send out cryptic messages to the curious onlookers. Men need to understand the distinction between feeding a woman’s ego and her longer term happiness, as the two rarely go hand in hand. The nice guys of the world – the average looking men as most are – produce the feeding pot to make women feel better and more important in their existence. They believe that, due to scoring above their league in beauty feasibility, they should be inclined to go the extra yard to please her. This strategy of excessive compliments, in addition to the emotional safety and financial expenditure they offer, is all well and good in the early stages of relationships. Women are instinctive to natural egoism escalation, and this good feeling will supersede any other biological mechanism that derives from meeting a man. There are some exceptions, as a small minority will place advanced priority on inner visceral grasp over self-centered thoughts. However, the sycophant mannerisms that boost a woman’s ego is short lasting in her appreciation, and it isn’t long before the positivity he brought to her self-indulged world turns to frustration on her part. The simple fact is this: a woman is aware that the higher value a man is, the less he will need to act supplicated when around her. A man with options – who isn’t afraid to lose his female partner – will have a care-free attitude that subconsciously enforces a woman in love to seek approval from him. It is a re-frame she is not aware of, but it is an invisible attribute he possesses to keep her interested. This isn’t to say complimentary words should be abandoned throughout. It is a simple balance between saying the words at the right time, in the appropriate context, and in incremental measures. A woman needs to earn kind words from a man. If she acts as a good person when in his presence, he returns the gesture. When a man succeeds in this process, and never allows it to fragment, she will never take him for granted.
When all is said and done, the sexual market is a numbers game and a case of supply and demand. There is a shortage of high social status bad boys in relation to women in general, and the small number of these men will take up the small number (although a higher quantity than high occupational status bad boys) of the most physically attractive women. This procedure is prominent, but not isolated, to women under the age of 23. There are far more average men – in physical attractiveness, personality, charisma, money and status stakes – than pretty women. On the flip side, there is a good deal more pretty women than handsome, high calibre men. There are also a lower number of extreme high occupational status men than beautiful looking women in the world. As female visual beauty dominates male projected attraction over any other female offering, whilst women assess a number of male strengths and weaknesses in suitability, the top 4% of eye catching females in a country’s population (90% of these being cute, 10% hot) will almost always have choices to make. This isn’t to mean all of them end up being happy with the man they ultimately select.
The big winners and losers in the modern day sexual market are as follows:
High social status men – bad boys
From a short term perspective, popular men with notorious reputations for being pre-selected will be the biggest winners in the modern day sexual market. This will be most prevalent with women below the age of 23, but because there is a short supply of men who fit this bill, the demand of cute and hot girls will rarely be on the light side. In simple terms, women love the thought of being with men who hold down local popularity. To be alongside a man who many other women crave to be close to, this completes the external validation and inner importance satisfactions. As a man in this bracket gets older, he will still attract women, but the numbers will diminish. More women beyond the age of 23 will be wary not to engage with him – even if they are still attracted – and younger women will not see an ageing bad boy with the same alluring eyes as his younger former self.
Young (up to age of twenty-five), high extreme physically attractive (“hot”) women
These women have the pick of nearly all men desiring their time. This will be the main bulk of men (average looking nice guys), the most physically attractive men, the highest status men, and some “sugar daddies”. If they have additional feminine, intelligence and endearing personality traits, this will further widen their attraction onto men.
Above average to average looking men
Needless to say, but important to clarify, the more sexual market value metrics these men possess, the more women they will attract. Men in this segment have a large pool of women to choose from. As most women in general prefer relationships with men less physically attractive than they are, a moderate calibre average looking man can acquire a woman a level or two of physical grades above the objectivity of his own. This is all the more achievable in a current economic climate that has resulted in a more challenging process for women to take on sole residence ownership and attaining a greater disposable income. Simply put, women may now be more inclined to place physical likings down the pecking order in favour of a man’s contribution to resources. If men of this kind prefer not to dive into the high maintenance stigma that exists with the most visually alluring women, they will not be condemned and disqualified by women with similar looks in relative terms. This is only true because women have far less trust, insecurity and egoism issues with men who are not receiving uncountable glances from female competitors and the outside world in general.
High occupational status average looking men
Even if considerably older than the pursued female lovers, the revolution of high profile celebrity programmes, magazines and media exposure has produced predilections for women to have a taste of the action. This “action” requires cash, and high status usually derives in the form of money. Even without the added benefit of the financial aspect, high social status also goes hand in hand with the evolution of projected lure of fame. If a man was in an occupational high status position (even if low paid), or if his occupation gave him the opportunity to exploit power and dominance, women are drawn to these positive metrics that elevate their external validation and perceived importance.
High calibre good looking men
High calibre good looking men
In the regular world, men of this nature would represent less than 1% of all men in the sexual market. Logic would point to the fact these men have limitless options with women, and some of them do. As these men are not solely relying on their physical impressiveness to appeal to women, they are ticking most boxes that women look upon when choosing male sexual partners. However, although these men are also looking for women with a range of qualities, they are no different to any other man in respect to placing maximum emphasis on how a woman looks. As most women prefer men less physically attractive than they are – as general observational evidence would point out – in addition to many of the “hottest” women being low in self-confidence, there are perhaps not the abundant luxuries men in this category can enjoy that people’s perception would allow them to believe. Consequently, whilst the ratio of high calibre good looking men to high grade looking women is approximately 1 to 4 in number, the likelihood is that only 10% to 20% or these female minds have the inner emotional security and confident demeanour to venture into long term intimacies with men of this kind.
Good looking moderate to low status men
This group will typically be young men under the age of 30. This is because most men will physically look their best before they reach their thirties, in addition to not having the years of occupational experience to elevate their status and wealth. A cocky and arrogant attitude of these men in their younger years also often forms a barrier that prevents them from manifesting an impressive personality and charisma. Good looking men will believe in the fallacy that male good looks are the most important accolade to have in attracting women. To an extent, they can be forgiven for this misconception, as they will notice the inundated glances received from the opposite sex. What many of these men fail to grasp is the realization that women are only looking, and not touching. Such a small percentage of women are relaxed in the arms of a man who will attain as much visual attention as she does, and good looks to a man can be a drawback if he has very little else to offer. It’s no coincidence many good looking men are single: they simply claim they are sexual players, because they can get away with people believing this is the case. Men in this category will have their most successful endeavours with women up to the age of 23. There on after, the success rate will slide with women above this age, and they will be best advised to analyze their chances with women in their late teens and early twenties – the age range where women are more prone to place greater emphasis on the way a man looks and have less fear in being with good looking men – for as long as possible.
Above average looking (“cute”) women
These women will have more choices than they possibly believe is plausible. Although they will almost always come second best to a more sexually attractive female, especially if it is on an “apples for apples” comparison with regards to personality and feminism traits, there is a large pool of men to choose from. However, the bad news is that they will lose out on their probable first choice – bad boys (if younger women) and high status men (if older women). This unfavourable outcome on their parts is purely down to the reality that the low number of men in these categories will plot for the women with higher physical beauty. Nevertheless, as most men fall into the average sexual market value region, there are more than enough mediocre males in looks, personality, charisma, financial and status terms to share around. Further to this, because most of the top 20% of physically attractive women stay away from the equivalent aesthetically pleasing men, confident women with above average looks can strive, and likely be successful, in securing a good looking man.
An ugly man’s dating success is totally aligned to his respective other offerings. If he is a low value ugly man – hence low paid, low intelligence and low ambition – he will attract, and locate, a woman of a similar level in relative terms. It’s when he has other sexual market value aspects women desire that it becomes more interesting. An extremely rich grotesque man, with high social and occupational status, will often be an overall “better” option for many women than a good looking man with other mediocre attributes. This could even include many of the “hottest” women. This may sound strange to people who do not study the sexual market to a great degree, but it all falls back to female reservations in being with men as physically attractive as themselves. Whilst an ugly man will not even attain a second look from a decent looking woman (unless it is in humour or disgust), the imperceptible compulsions that exist to not be with better looking men can lead a female mind to rationalized thoughts, and conclude that an ugly man’s strong points can cloud over her immediate repulsive viewing.
Average to ugly women